the 2 dudez issue #3 "the unsolved mysteries" *last issue, our two heroes single handedly beat both the evil bossmeister and Barney* Dude #1: Heh, dude, i was thinking... Dude #2: Did it hurt? Dude #1: Yeah... Dude #2: It hurts when I do it to0. Dude #1: Alright! Dude #2: What? Dude #1: I forgot. Dude #2: Oh. Dude #1: I remember! Dude #2: You do? Dude #1: Yeah, just tell me what I was thinking about. Dude #2: I dunno, I'd have to think and that hurts too much. Dude #1: Well, maybe later 'k? Dude #2: 'k. *Suddenly there's a knock at the door* Dude #1: Dude, could you get that? Dude #2: Naw, could you? Dude #1: You do it. Dude #2: No, you. Dude #1: You. Dude #2: No. Dude #1: Fine then, I'll get up. Dude #2: No, I will. Dude #1: No, me. Dude #2: Me. Dude #1: Fine then, you do it. Dude #2: No, you. *I'm pretty sure you get it by now, anyways, they finally get to the door, after about an hour of senseless bickering* Dude #1: What's up, man? Wimpy Man in Glasses: Allo Dude #1: Did you say hello? Wimpy Dude: No, I said allo, but that's close enough. Dude #2: Yeah... Wimpy Dude: Can I come in? Dude #1: Naww, it's pretty messy around here, how about we clean up first! *The 2 dudez set to work, throwing dirty underwear and other miscellaneous undergarments you wouldn't expect to find in a Dudez's pad, unfluff the pillows and other things like turning potted plants upside down.* Dude #1: 'k now you can come in. Wimpy Dude: Thank you, may I sit down? Dude #2: Yeah right there *points to smoldering fireplace* Wimpy Dude: *Looks up the chimney* This is an apartment, in a two story building, how come you have a fireplace? *Dude #2 looks confused* Dude #1: Uhh, dude? Could you like say like that like back like in like english like my like friend's like confused like 'k? Wimpy Dude: *Pulls out pom poms* Like yeah, Gimme a y! Dude #1&2: Y!!! Wimpy Dude: What's that spell? Dude #1&2: Hexadecimal? *Exasperated, the wimpy dude jumps out of the window, which, with it being on the first floor, he isn't hurt very badly, save a few grass stains on his suit* Dude #1: Mmmm, grass. Dude #2: Dude. Dude #1: Yeah, dude? Dude #2: I dunno. Dude #1: 'k? *And now, for something completely different* Skeleton: Buy new Bleechy Wite, it tastes like bleach and whitens like it too! Disclaimer Guy: Do not put Bleechy Wite toothpaste in or anywhere near your mouth. Skeleton: Now at a low price of 100 Zorkmids a gallon!!! Disclaimer Guy: Do not ever open a bottle of Bleechy Wite Toothpaste, or you might throw your guts up and die at the disgusting sight. *And now, a day later at the 2 dudes' apartment* Dude #1: Hey dude? Dude #2: Yeah? Dude #1: I was just wondering... Dude #2: Yeah? Dude #1: Yup. Dude #2: Pretty cool. Dude #1: Yeah, but it sure hurt. *Then The alarm goes off* Dude #1: Dude! It's 6:45! Time to go to work! Dude #2: 'k. *And so the 2 dudez once again walk off into the sunset to arrive to work exactly twelve hours early and twelve hours late.* -END- I know I promised the origin but I think that that would spoil any spontaniety of my little thing here. So I killed the only person who new anything about the 2 dudez's past, or at least roughed him up a bit(I must say, I am becoming a very good fighter). I have no one to really thank, I made this on my own, and due to the lack of response, I will only make one more episode and then stop until more interest is renewed. I guess the world just wasn't ready for my brand of comedy, or anyone elses for that matter for it seem as though the only people who ever visit my page are a bunch of depressed fags who don't give a shit about anyone around them and won't even bother to e-mail me. This does not mean that any of my other works of fiction will be stopped. What other works you say? Good question, because I write a lot, I will have a lot more up, including some poetry and other stuff, I must remind you that I *AM* bearing my soul to the whole world so I would like to make it clear that any outside (or inside for that matter) reaction to my writing in any negative way will be flamed at personally. Shoutouts: Rage Shaddy Melanie Jor'El Brian Transcendental Magick The WLPA Teen Forum and especially Lion Of Judah Reverend L'il Manson and her always so very happy disposition. James O'Barr Mentor Lady Kat Night Ruler King Blotto Raphella VampTramp Raymond Buckland Scott Adams Douglas Adams Not all of these people are acquaintances, but all are inspirations. Hey, does anyone know who Billie Meyers is? ;-P Goodbye everyone. Dude #1 "I'm 15 and already hate myself. Well that just sucks for you, don't it?" Zachary Middleton -Birth of a Revenant