It's up to you to get help and get yourself into a more healthy environment
and situation. Don't count on Child Protection Services (CPS) to
help you! There are only a few individuals in that organization with
enough integrity to realize what the whole purpose of that organization
is -- to help kids out of potentially dangerous situations. The majority
of them are only taking advantage of the plight of abused and neglected
kids everywhere to get a bigger operating budget,
meaning more money for the big bosses. So count them out.
Also, laws and preconceived notions are set up so the police won't do anything
for you either.
I realize taking in the fact that both of the above are not going to
protect you is difficult. It might make you feel helpless, angry,
or frustrated. Children should
not have to deal with these difficult issues. Children were meant
to play, dream, and learn about all the good and wondrous things life has
to offer. Sadly, as long as you're living in an abusive situation,
any promise of that kind of life will always turn out to be tainted in
one way or another. It will seem like nothing you try works out,
like life is meant to be disheartening, frustrating, and negative.
That's why you need to be able to get out and into another kind
of environment.
If you are just coming to terms with this, you might think this is impossible
and futile. You might be in disbelief. If your parents, the
people who are supposed to love you and nurture you, protect you and care
for you, can't be trusted to get that much right, who can be? Believe
it or not, there are people who will love you and care for you and do everything
your parents are supposed to do for you -- without the guilt and abuse
attached to it. And even though you won't be getting it from your
biological parents, that kind of treatment is a lot better and healthier
for you. You will feel more whole, more complete, and more positive.
These people are out there. It's just a matter of finding them.
First thing's first. Getting out of the house and into a safe, healthy zone will take time and a good plan. Don't run away one night you feel like you're pissed at hell at your parents' abuse and don't want to deal with them anymore. Use that burst of emotion; don't let it use you. If you run away half-cocked and angry, you probably won't find the people I described. You're more likely to find trouble instead. And you can't afford that. You need as many friends and contacts as you can possibly get. And you don't need enemies. Your parents are already serving to function in that role.
This is the plan in the best order. Follow it to the letter:
1) Try to get a lawyer, but don't count on one.
Save up money from allowances, money from relatives,
personal savings, or a part-time job if you have one. Wait until
you have $300 saved up. Then,
look up "lawyers" in the yellow pages.
Call at least 40 different offices within walking distance of your house.
Don't count on your parents to give you
a ride. When you make the calls, ask
about free initial consultation fees. Only give them your first name.
If they ask about your address or phone
number, don't give it to them. Tell
them you are afraid of being retaliated against and would prefer it if
you could wait until you got to the office.
If they tell you it will remain confidential,
hang up and move on to the next call. Set up appointments with firms
that don't ask for your info and will
give a free consultation.
When you arrive at the office, stay alert.
Make sure you start observing everything around you. The receptionist
will ask you to fill out a form. Tell
her you're afraid of your parents finding
out that you've spoken to an attorney. If she insists that anything
you tell her will remain confidential, tell her
you insist on only talking to the lawyer about
it since he's the one that's bound by the confidentiality agreement.
If she doesn't let you see the attorney
unless you give her the info, be prepared
to do the same as you did on the phone. Walk out of there.
If she agrees, watch her reaction to your
insistence that you didn't want to give her
the info. Look at her facial expression carefully. Do you think
she understands why? Also, does she
take you seriously despite the fact that you're
under 18? Remember, what she thinks isn't as important as what the
lawyer thinks, but she can
serve as a pretty good gauge of how
seriously the attorney will take you.
When you are face to face with the lawyer,
study him carefully. Is he surprised at how young you are?
Does he take you seriously? Is his tone
patronizing or friendly? Does he ask
you where your parents are? Go in there with confidence, and make
him understand right off the bat that
you know what you're talking about.
Ask him about something called pro buono and what his policies are regarding
it. He will know what it means,
but don't let on that you don't. It
will become clear to you what it means when you hear him talking about
it. Also, ask him if he's ever represented
somebody in an emancipation or independent
living case. If he doesn't know what either of those means, he's
not your man.