A cub reporter was complaining about the President's accessibility to the
media. Talking to another veteran mediaman, he said it is harder now to get
through the President compared to those days when he was still Mayor,
Senator and even Vice President.

The mediaman said, "Pare, hindi totoo yan! In fact they have installed a very
sophisticated telephone system over at Malacanang. All you need to do is lift
the handset and presto you can talk to the President anytime."

"Really?" said the amused reporter and hurriedly ended the conversation. "O,
sigue pare, thank you sa tip ha? Tatawag na kaagad ako sa Presidente!"

And so the reporter got hold of a telephone and dialed the Malacanang
number, and this is what he heard:

"GOOD MORNING, YOU HAVE REACHED THE OFFICE OF THE
PRESIDENT. IF YOU WISH TO TALK TO HIM IN TAGALOG,
PLEASE PRESS 1. IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO HIM IN FILIPINO,
PLEASE PRESS 2. IF YOU INSIST ON TALKING TO HIM IN
ENGLISH, PLEASE HANG UP AND DON'T CALL AGAIN!"

That didn't dampen the spirit of the persistent reporter. He dialed the number
again and followed the instruction by pressing 1 (for Tagalog), and this is
what he heard:

MAGANDANG UMAGA PO, ANG INYONG TAWAG AY
NAKARATING SA TANGGAPAN NG PANGULONG ERAP. SA
KASAWIANG PALAD, SIYA AY KASALUKUYAN PANG 
NATUTULOG. KUNG MAYROON KAYONG IBANG NAIS
MAKAUSAP, SUNDIN ANG MGA SUMUSUNOD:

"PINDUTIN ANG ISA PARA SA UNANG ASAWA, PINDUTIN ANG
DALAWA PARA SA PANGALAWANG ASAWA, AT PINDUTIN
ANG TATLO KUNG MAYROON KAYONG
MAIRE-REKOMENDA!"