Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired
        signifies in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not
        fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.  This world in arms is not
        spending money alone.  It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the
        genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.  This is not a way
        of life at all in any true sense.  Under the clouds of war, it is
        humanity hanging on a cross of iron.
                        -- Dwight Eisenhower, April 16, 1953
 
 
 

                          Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
        1.  Never use an elevator in a building that has been hit by a nuclear
             bomb; use the stairs.
        2.  When you're flying through the air, remember to roll when you hit
             the ground.
        3.  If you're on fire, avoid gasoline and other flammable materials.
        4.  Don't attempt communication with dead people; it will only lead to
             psychological problems.
        5.  Food will be scarce; you will have to scavenge.  Learn to recognize
             foods that will be available after the bomb: mashed potatoes,
             shredded wheat, tossed salad, ground beef, etc.
        6.  Put your hand over your mouth when you sneeze; internal organs will
             be scarce in the post-nuclear age.
        7.  Try to be neat; fall only in designated piles.
        8.  Drive carefully in "Heavy Fallout" areas; people could be
             staggering illegally.
        9.  Nutritionally, hundred dollar bills are equal to ones, but more
             sanitary due to limited circulation.
        10. Accumulate mannequins now; spare parts will be in short supply on
              D-Day.
 

                                 *** Fortune of the day ***

        The temperature of Heaven can be rather accurately computed.  Our
        authority is Isaiah 30:26, "Moreover, the light of the Moon shall be as
        the light of the Sun and the light of the Sun shall be sevenfold, as
        the light of seven days."  Thus Heaven receives from the Moon as much
        radiation as we do from the Sun, and in addition 7*7 (49) times as much
        as the Earth does from the Sun, or 50 times in all.  The light we
        receive from the Moon is one 1/10,000 of the light we receive from the
        Sun, so we can ignore that ... The radiation falling on Heaven will
        heat it to the point where the heat lost by radiation is just equal to
        the heat received by radiation, i.e., Heaven loses 50 times as much
        heat as the Earth by radiation.  Using the Stefan-Boltzmann law for
        radiation, (H/E)^4 = 50, where E is the absolute temperature of the
        earth (-300K), gives H as 798K (525C).  The exact temperature of Hell
        cannot be computed ... [However] Revelations 21:8 says "But the
        fearful, and unbelieving ... shall have their part in the lake which
        burneth with fire and brimstone."  A lake of molten brimstone means
        that its temperature must be at or below the boiling point, 444.6C.  We
        have, then, that Heaven, at 525C is hotter than Hell at 445C.
                -- From "Applied Optics" vol. 11, A14, 1972
 
 

             "In the arithmetic, of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus
            one equals nothing."

                - Mignon McLaughlin
          "We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh."
                - Agnes Repplier
 
 
 

        *** Fortune of the day ***

        Gold, n.:
                A soft malleable metal relatively scarce in distribution.  It
        is mined deep in the earth by poor men who then give it to rich men who
        immediately bury it back in the earth in great prisons, although gold
        hasn't done anything to them.
                        -- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
 
 

         *** Fortune of the day ***

        My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I
        threw my amplifier out the dormitory window.  We did not act in haste.
        First we checked to make sure the amplifier would fit through the
        frame, using the belt from my bathrobe to measure, then we picked up
        the amplifier and backed up to my bedroom door.  Then we rushed
        forward, shouting "The WHO!  The WHO!" and we launched my amplifier
        perfectly, as though we had been doing it all our lives, clean through
        the window and down onto the sidewalk, where a small but appreciative
        crowd had gathered.  I would like to be able to say that this was a
        symbolic act, an effort on my part to break cleanly away from one state
        in my life and move on to another, but the truth is, Cooper and I
        really just wanted to find out what it would sound like.  It sounded
        OK.
                        -- Dave Barry, "The Snake"
 
 

        *** Fortune of the day ***

                Non-Reciprocal Laws of Expectations:
                    Negative expectations yield negative results.
                    Positive expectations yield negative results.
 

        Definition; November,
                         The eleventh twelth of a weariness.
                          -- Ambrose Beirce, The Devils Dictionary --