The Physics-Beard Relationship
Welcome to our report on the physics-beard relationship. We have spent years locked away with physics researchers, and whilst we were present at many historical discoveries, we were most amazed by our accidental discovery.
It seemed impossible and highly improbably at first, but after much research and deliberation, we believe that our findings are accurate. I hope you do not take our word for this, but actually test this relationship for yourself, then you can experience our discovery for yourselves.
Our discovery began one day when I was in the presence of none other than Mr. Fisher*, ex-weatherman turned A-level Physics teacher. Whilst taking notes, I realised how Mr. Fisher was much better at phyiscs than any of his previous phyiscs teachers, including women teaching the same course. Trying to think why this was, I soon realised his Physics knowledge might be stored in his facial hair, just as Samson's strength has stored in his hair. Curious as to this thought, I put it to the back of my mind, only to resurface days later.
A few days later, I was reading a hefty book describing old physicists, such as Einstein, Pythagoras, Socretes, Faraday, Coulomb etc. At the end of this book, there was a small biography of some of the previously mentioned physicists. Now most of these came complete with photos, all in black and white (of course Socretes and Pythagoras don't have photos of themselves, so busts were used). I was just skimming through this text when he realised that all of these great people sported facial hair. I was startled. Without delay, I proposed his theory to Om {god}, and waited impatiently for a reaction. After a few minutes of silence, Om {god} decided that this should be looked into. The very next day Om {god} and myself were invited to spend a few days at Mr. Fisher's home. Yet more startling discoveries were revealed . . .
*For those of you who don't know who Mr Fisher is, think of a tall, train spotter, with a huge beard that talks like David Attenbrough, that teaches Physics at A-level.