O.K., People! Why didn't at least one of you clue us in that there is hot man on man action in Dude, Where's My Car? You folks are really becoming out of touch!
Yea, yea. 200 channels and that was the only thing I found remotely interesting to watch last night.
So these two Hobbits (Seann and Ashton) wake up in the Shire. It seems the night before, they went to their Uncle Bilbo's 111th Birthday Party and got wasted. Now they are really hung over and can't remember a thing about the previous night.
They meet Suramon the evil wizard disguised as the most unconvincing transexual in the world. Suramon informs the Hobbits that they must bring him/her a suitcase full of money or suffer the consequences.
Then they meet Gandalf the good Swedish wizard of twins and he tells them they are in charge of the space-time transducer or the time warp transponder or something. Anyway, if this Ring of Power falls into the wrong hands, it will cause all of Middle Earth to be destroyed.
So the happy Hobbits go their marry way and recover the Ring and the suitcase of money and destroy Sauron who is really 5 large breasted women in skin tight leather jump suits.
During the making of this film, the director woke up one morning and had an epiphany:
(director guy slaps forehead) "My God! I am making a terrible movie. This piece of crap is going to get me laughed out of the Director's Guild! And not in a good way."
So the director guy wracks his brain and comes up with a new scene. He hires Fabio for no apparent reason and he has Seann and Ashton passionately kiss each other for no apparent reason.
This saves the film.
