Why is it so hard to find that balance?
The comfortable place between apathy and tortuous empathy.
When I start to care so much that my life suffers, and nothing I say or do seems to make a difference, I want to give up.
I want to say fuck you for making me care.
I want to walk away and wash my hands of it.
I want to turn my back and live as a hermit and forget the world.
Then I remember what makes me feel most like that, and it is other people's apathy.
Then I want to say fuck you for making me NOT care!
Then I remember how much I hate when people refuse to take responsibility for theor own actions.
I think about how shitty it is to place blame.
I think about how I always complain about people who constantly point their fingers and never seem to look in the mirror while they are pointing their fingers.
And I want to look in the mirrior and say fuck you, and turn around and walk away from the person in the mirror.
But EVERY time I come back to the mirror he is there again.
I can't walk away from him.
No matter how gard I try.
I turn my back on him, and he turns his back on me, but we both know that the other one is still there.