FREEDOM

Before I became a christian, I was one of those religious people. I went to church because I was supposed to, lived a certain life style because that was what I had to do to "get into heaven". There wasn't much sincerity in my effort unless ofcourse I was in need of something - then you would see me praying and worshipping God with some sincerity but obviously my motives were wrong. I used to attend a very charismatic church where all they wanted see was miracles, signs and wonders. I wasn't too crazy about this but I figured I gotta go with the flow. Church services were sometimes like mini - concerts - I sometimes went to church to be entertained and show them the latest dance moves. I thought my funky dance moves had to have God tremendously pleased with me since I wasn't at a club but instead at church showing off my funky moves. My whole worship to God was based on what I thought would please or what the pastor at my church said or what the rules of the church required me to do or how I was feeling that particular day. I ofcourse fell short here and there but I felt I was good enough to enter heaven - I didn't kill anyone, I didn't go around robbing banks and I was gonna wait till I got married before having sexual intercourse. As far as I was concerned, I was alright.

So when I finished my B.S at Brockport, my intention was to go to Syracuse University for my Masters'. I applied to other schools as well. I even applied to State University of New York at StonyBrook just for the fun of it. Well, I got into Syracuse alright, but I got no funding. I also got into SUNY StonyBrook, not only with a tuition waiver but also a stipend. I would be stupid to pass that up so I decided to go to StonyBrook. Who would have known that all this was part of God's plan to bring me into His kingdom.

Arriving at StonyBrook was pretty cool. I had to attend an orientation meeting for the fellowship that I got to attend the school once I arrived there. While we were having lunch, I noticed that the girl sitting beside me said her prayers so when she finished I asked her if she was a christian. She said she was ( Hi Nunu). I told her that I was too but I hadn't been to church in a while since I couldn't find a "black" church since getting to StonyBrook (little did I know that in God's church, there is no jew, no gentile, no greek, (no black, no white) but Christ is all and is in all Col 3:11) She smiled. We hit it off great and exchanged numbers. She asked if I would like to study the bible with her. I said sure - I thought to myself that this would give me a chance to teach her a few things - so I thought.

We started studing the bible and it didn't take me too long to find out that I've had it all wrong all along. My pride was hurt cos I thought I was "Big Willie" when it came to being a good Christian. The first thing that hit me hard was that "The heart is decietful above all things" Jer 17:9. I had been serving God according to what i thought was good or what I felt was right. I read of the example of Saul before he became Paul, how he was going around killing Christians because he thought they were blasphemers, thinking he was serving God by killing them. He was following his heart until Christ spoke to him and asked him why he was doing this Acts 9. Until then he had no clue.

Another shocker for me was that I thought I was "SAVED". I saw being saved as a check list. - There are certain things I am to do and not do, once I fulfull all those requirements, I'm saved. Boy was I wrong. I found out that being saved from my sins is not something based on my actions but it was an act of God almighty. It is not about following a check list but an actual relationship with God that is motivated by love and this starts at baptism. I needed to first repent and get baptized for the forgiveness of my sins and until that sin is removed, I cannot have a relationship with God (Acts 2, Romans 6).

So when I read this in the Bible, I had to make that change immediately. I repented of my ways and got baptized for the forgiveness of my sins. I then learned that being a Christian is not above restrictive rules and regulations as I had thought but it is actually a love relationship with the God of the Universe. I can't even begin to explain the amount of freedom that I feel. I was no longer bound by "church rules" or "pastor's rules" or even my heart but I have been freed by the love of Christ. There is no fear of hell because Christ removed that on the cross and I live a godly life not because I am trying to make heaven(my righteousness isn't good enough anyway) but because I have hope of eternal life and because I know my Daddy above loves me.

Guys, God is love and all he wants is an intimate love relationship from us - after all, he made us. It took me 18 years to find out and I thank God for His patience. If you wanna learn more about this freedom that loving the Lord brings, please contact me at my email address and we can set up bible studies (even via email) or check out my church's web cite. There are alot of bible studies posted there.

So this is my story and I tell to everyone who gives me a chance to. I am blessed in everyway, especially with a love relationship with the God of the Universe - Best Believe.