JOKES!

Should women have children after 35?
No, 35 children are enough!
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Are you coming for my 18th birthday party?
No, I went for that five years ago..
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No one has ever complained of a parachute not opening..
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Living on Earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip
around the Sun..
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Your future depends on your dreams
So go to sleep !
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ALCOHOL KILLS SLOWLY
So what ?  Who's in a hurry ?
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Work fascinates me
I can look at it for hours !
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God made relatives
Thank God we can choose our friends
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Love is photogenic;
It needs darkness to develop
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Children in backseats cause accidents;
Accidents in backseats cause children !
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A Policeman catches a guy who was crossing the street at a wrong
place and shouts,
"Why are you crossing here ?
Can't you see a zebra crossing there ????".
The guy replies, "Let the zebra cross. What can I do !!!!!".
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Do you know of a Sardar who parked his car in front of board which
said FINE FOR PARKING
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A drunk was hauled into court. Mister, the judge began, you've been brought
here for drinking..>Great, the drunk exclaimed.  When do we get started?
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Can you do anything that other people can't
Sure, I can read my handwriting..

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Whom are you working for?>
Same people. My wife and four kids..
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Divorce has become so common that my wife and
I are staying marriedjust to be different..
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When a wife was asked: What book do you like the best?
She answers: My husband's cheque book..
 

Patient: "Doctor, doctor I keep seeing double!"
Doctor: "Sit on the couch"
Patient: "Which one?"

Patient: "Doctor, doctor I feel like a pair of curtains!"
Doctor: "Pull yourself together!"

Patient: "Doctor, doctor I've only got 59 seconds to live!"
Doctor: "Just a minute!"

Patient: "Doctor, doctor my wooden leg is giving me a lot of pain!"
Doctor: "Why's that?"
Patient: "My wife keeps hitting me over the head with it!"

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