Red, green, blue is the sky,
as the beatnik looks at my bloodshot eye,
the sonorous jingle at the coffee shop
as the smooth jazz to Bon Jovi skips a hop.

Not long after, I awake.
How much more sleep could I take?
My monkey rang me up at the half  ‘til four!
How glad am I to see my team would score.

Touchdown! Homerun! What fun!
The monkeys were beating the Huns.
The prize, a spleen so blue with jewels;
The monkeys ate bugs off each other and looked like fools.

Alas, my captain spoke.
Said Murdock, ”It was just a hoax.”
Said Face, ”Twas Earth all along.”
Replied Murdock, ”Be they crazy, they shant get the prong!”

And then there was Hannibal,
He was everything but malleable.
He led the bunch
And he never had nothing for lunch.

Last there was B. A.,
Gold chains; the monkeys’ delight.
He shined until the early night,
With Colonel Decker, he shall fight.

They knew not what they were doing.
Only the prize was a turquoise wig with pine.
Is it sumo, baseball, or hogball?
They knew not as they ran on.

Knew not either their corporate  sponsors.
Ah, the carnage! No midget was safe!
They did toss and toss, as the monkeys groomed.
Scoff did they as the last dwarf  had flossed!

Had they no spine they would stop.
They wanted nothing but fundage.
Then tragedy struck,
For a dingo just ate me Mum!

Back in my homeland,
Where Travolta ruled with an iron hand,
Was there the digeridoo,
And the box filled with poo.

As a wee one,
How much fun!
The dingoes’ pride,
Regurgitate on your hide!

Death comes as I cling to life,
No more shall I eat the knife of strife.
The silent, subtle killer is leprosy,
As my finger falls off as I write this with no symmetry.