Please email me (look above for the email link!) and let me know if you've got any of the missing ones! It could be your chance to see your name in lights! Have fun and happy chewing!

# 5 Today's the day. (if not, tomorrow is too)

# 7 Tall people may be taller, but they always get rained on first.

# 14 The beauty of a vibrating phone goes beyond silence

# 19 Don’t date someone who says they need to be “selfish right now”

# 26 Love is Blind, but lingerie is still a good thing.

# 27 Why is “abbreviated” such a long word?

# 28 Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

# 31 How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you’re on

# 36 Let the awkward silence that follows your jokes be a sign.

# 38 How is it that every movie that comes out is "The Best Movie of the Year"?

# 78 Save the sequins for your ice skating outfit (or better yet, not even then!)

Sequins: Small round flat pieces of shiny metal or plastic sewn onto clothing to add shimmer and reflect light.

# 86 They're not staring at your clothes. At least not yet!

# 92 Why do people call their advice “two cents” when it’s usually worthless?

# 111 The scenery was nice, but the road was a little curvy

# 116 Replacing someones parachute with canned goods is not funny.

# 131 Why is it that the more you spend on dinner, the hungrier you are when you leave the restaurant?

# 142 Don’t cut the pinapple with a broken knife, or the knife will turn into woodstock ‘69.

# 150 Horoscopes are about as useful as advice printed on gum packs.

# 152 Want to see the world? Just look down. That’s it right there.

# 160 I dare you to chew a few pieces of Dentyne Ice and then drink some very cold water.

# 162 Try this: to get someone to keep talking - nod your head and say “REALLY?”

Updated: 4AM 06/08/2006

This site was created on Sunday May 28, 2006

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