I was on a tour of Louisiana and this particular day happened to be Bayou Day. Our guide took us all on a small canoe and out into the swamp waters. He told us about how man eating alligators were moving around right below us, and it was rather unsettling. One of the people in the boat asked him if we were in any danger, and he replied, "Normally, yes, but not today my friend, for I have the Magical Alligator Tunnel Powder!" We all asked "What?!?" and he said "Watch...and learn."

The guide reached into his pouch and scattered powder into the water. For a while, nothing happened. Then after a while, alligators began peeking up from the water. Several of the passengers began to panic, but he assured us that we were safe and again told us to watch. After 30 or so alligators gathered on each side of the boat, the guide whistled and they began to leap out of the water over the boat and back in on the other side. They were all doing this at certain intervals so that it felt like we were in a tunnel made of alligators. Then one of the tourists jumped up and yelled "Follow me! I am George Washington!" and the guide yelled "Nooo--" but it was too late. The tourist was attacked by one of the descending alligators and taken down into the water. The guide said "Whatever you do, don't say what he said! It upsets the alligators! It may be too late anyway--" and then it became apparent that yes, it was too late, because an alligator got the guide before he could finish his sentence.

We didn't know what to do--the only person familiar with the territory was dead and we had quite a bit of swamp left. But then a masked man wearing a red sweatsuit came out of the water and yelled "I shall save you! I am the Alligator Repulsor, and I shall keep these beasts away from your boat!" The alligators would get near the passengers, and the Alligator Repulsor would swat them away with his Alligator Bat. We were saved. The rest of the ride was quite relaxing with the soothing sounds of rippling water and alligator swattings.

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