They marveled at their ability to mimic the sounds of others. They delighted in creating patterns from the sounds they mimicked. They were entranced by the noises they made. Each was in love with their own sounds even though they were only mimicked sounds. It was like watching a flock of crows. As one squawked another would squawk and soon the noise would become louder. Even their forms were changing. Where before each had their own body, now there were just a spiral of colorful gases joined together in a strange but somehow elegant dance. The colors merged to form new colors. A foggy mist seem to surround the colors as if it was observing the ritual. Or perhaps presiding over the event. I felt myself struggling for air. I gasped but could not fill my ravenous lungs. The gases were poisonous. That had to be it. They had changed to gases in an attempt to eliminate me.
"You can't kill me with your toxic fumes," I screamed loudly to the copulating mixture.
I was horrified to discover that my own words had now changed into noises. I ran for the door but the gases surrounded me. They were trying to engulf me. Assimilate me into their formless world of nothingness. A world without substance, or meaning. Just the repetition of the maddening sounds. The sounds now were unbearably loud. I was lost inside their shadowy, misty abyss. I struggled and screamed but all I heard was noises and more noises. I looked down and saw my arm changing into a gaseous state of battling hues. The other gases now carried me, lifting me. Was this some time of initiation to the world of gas reality? Suddenly everything changed to black. No more colors or sounds.
I awoke in some unfamiliar, disturbing setting. I gazed out upon my new world and saw the floating Jelly-Fish with its whirlwind of colors. I was frighten and tried to run but I was restrained. Not by a human or even a gas but something solid and unyielding held me. A warmth now covered my body, if you can call my gaseous state a body. With the warmth came a feeling of peace and calm. I was no longer frightened. Somehow I felt at ease as if everything was how it was meant to me. I looked again at the Flying- Jelly fish. Seeing for the first time it's spectacular beauty. White illuminated tentacles hung from its transparent body. The tentacles pulsated, shimmered and shined. They illuminated a power. I could feel it touch me but never did it move. The transparent body was filled with thousands of colors constantly in motion but not blending together. Each color although similar was unique and independent from the others. Together the colors seem to highlight and contrast the wonder of the others. There was more colors then I have seen or known of. More, colors then exist on this planet. Maybe that was it maybe I was not on Earth. Perhaps I'd been abducted my aliens from another world. Even if this was true, it didn't matter. I felt more at home now then I ever had in my life. I was at peace. My surroundings although completely foreign were somehow familiar. As if I'd been there before but I never had.
I gazed again at the form floating in front of me. I felt it's serene presence, as I had not before. This was where the my feelings of euphoria were emulating from. The Form, The Flying Jelly- Fish, The Creature, The Presence, The Visitor. All of these names were appropriate but none captured its essence. I realize the only way to properly describe something was to relate it to something we had already seen. Unless the event had either occurred or similar ones had with every person, words could not properly describe an occurrence. New occurrences on Earth have become so rare we have lost the ability to defined them when they do occur. Well, what was happening to me now had never happen to me or anyone else I imagine.
The Form omitted some kind of force that would enter your body and fill you with warmth and love. I heard myself saying "I love you" and it was again words I spoke.
The Serene Form own words now filled my head. I don't know if I heard the words or saw them, or felt them. But somehow The Presence was able to convey its message to me.
"I love you too, my son."
"Where am I? How did I get here, I asked?
"My friend you've stumbled into this place from shock. You were desperately, frantically searching somewhere, anywhere and some how from your pain you found us. It was an accident. You are not meant to be here, there are but a few humans who have entered. There are things here that your knowledge simply can't understand. It is dangerous to be here. You have come unprepared. I am sure you have already began to question the significance of our pulsating colors. You surely must be wondering to our purpose."
"You keep saying "Us" but I see only you."
"There are many of me and with me. You would not understand nor should you. It is not meant to be. I will tell you this which I hope is enough to make you understand that you can not stay . All of this is occurring inside your own head. We live apart from you but from within you."
"So you're saying I'm hearing voices inside my head. That I am insane?"
"No, you've stumbled into a plain of too many unknown facades, it can not be understood by you. That is why you must leave."
"I'm not sure I can handle what I already heard."
"There is no need to worry moments from now you will awaken from what you will assume was a dream. One last thing you won't understand it now but someday you will: Do not fear the visit of lost love ones. It is from your ability to welcome their return that you demonstrate that some day you will be back here, to stay. Visits from what you consider ghost may not seem impossible, but I assure you every one you have ever loved remains inside of you. Someday you will be free to travel and to bring back whoever you choice. Bring them back one and all but never try to hold onto the vision. There is danger when a spirit realizes its soul has been transported into the land of the living. Farewell my friend when we meet again I believe you will be prepared to hear much more.
I fell out of bed with a strange sensation inside my head. I could remember only pieces of my dream but I was sure it had been a journey into some marvelous place. It occurred to me that perhaps the dreams that leave only a trace in your mind, leave the rest in much grandeur places.
"What the hell are you doing, Tim."
I turned to see it was Bill laying on a cot in our Hotel Room who had asked me this question.
"What do you mean, I asked? I was sleeping I guess although I don't remember going to sleep."
"Well, believe me the rest of us do. You were acting very strange last night."
"What are you talking about?"
"First you screamed something about that you weren't going to let us kill you with our poison gas then you walked outside and didn't return for three hours. You finally walked in like you were in some kind of trance and went to bed without saying a word. We figured you were just trying to act weird but it was spooky. So, tell me was it an act, you do remember all of that don't you?"
"Yeah, sure I was just fucking with your perspective on reality," I said hoping he would buy it.
"Well, very funny. Now shut the fuck up so I can get some sleep."
I had lied to Bill because I had no idea what the truth was.
It sounded like he had more information about the night then I did. I'd drunk some, maybe I had a black out or maybe it was just nerves. I mean I'd just found out my Dad was possibly dying. Whatever, it was all about I decided the best thing to do, was go back to sleep. Besides for some reason I was very tired.
I was the first one to awaken the next morning. My head still felt a little weird and everything I saw had a kind of fuzzy look to it. I walked outside to get some air, figuring that this might help to bring me around. The previous night was more clear in my mind. What troubled me most was that I must not had been dreaming when I'd thought everyone had changed into some gaseous substance. Bill had told me that I called them poisonous gases. I felt pretty together this morning so why bother trying to explain it to them.
Just then the door of our Hotel room swung opened, and out walked Tina.
"So, you O.K. this morning? You gave us all a scare last night. What was up with all that stuff," Tina said in a calming beautiful voice.
"I was just playing. Sorry if I scared you."
"Yeah, well, Amy told us about your father after you walked out last night. Hell man that's enough to make anyone a little batty, I'm glad you're feeling better, if you want to talk you know where all here for you."
"Thanks but I'm fine," I said both trying to convince Tina and myself.
"Yeah, I know you are but sometimes it helps to talk about things, Tina said sweetly and then went back into the room.
It was very nice that Tina was trying to help but it made be feel awkward. Also, I felt the budge in my pants shifting, I realized that it also made me horny for some reason. Sometimes by Dick did have a mind of its own. I had never even considered Tina in that way but apparently "my little throbbing friend" had.
I wanted to talk to the others about what had happened but I was scared. How do you explain to someone that the previous night you thought they had turned into a gas that was trying poisoning you...not poison, assimilate I thought. Anyhow, it wouldn't be easy. Not to mentioned the fact that I had absolutely no explanation to what occurred during the three hours after I left the room. Hell they would probably lock me up. I was feeling better now, better to just let last night die in their memories. Whatever they thought happened couldn't be any worse then what actually did.
When I went back into the room the rest of them were now up. Bryan just assumed I was fucking off the previous night and barely even mentioned it. Amy eyed me with a mixture of concern and puzzlement but said nothing.
We loaded our gear and were on the highway by 6:30 AM. It was a warm pleasant morning with the temperature right around 70 degrees. I was afraid that I would continue dwelling on the previous during the ride but this was not the case. It took all my concentration to keep the ride smooth. The fuzzy look of objects had not gone away and at 90mph+, it was a challenge to interrupt what was on the road and what wasn't. My entire focus was on my riding and even then I was scared shitless. There was things on the road I saw that day, that made me wonder how I come this far? There was pebbles, sand, gravel, screws, nuts. I mean the whole road was one big mine field. How had I not seen this before? There were also other things I saw that day but I dismissed them. They were probably just a product of my brain trying to create something out of what my fuzzy vision provided it. I mean some of the things couldn't be real. Surely, other people would notice human skulls and slaughtered corpses if they were littering our highways. I mean of course they would. Those objects did not exist and as long as I understood that everything was fine. And the putrid stench that wasn't real either. Just an active imagination and to many days on lonely highways.
When we stopped for lunch, I discovered that I had no appetite. It wasn't just because the Hamburgers were spurring blood across the room and guts of butchered animals dangled from the mouths of my companions. No that wasn't it, O.K. it was partially it, but I knew that too was not real. I mean, I knew what was going on, it just wasn't what was happening. Things are just a little fuzzy that's all. I'm not crazy but they kept starring at me as if I were. With that placid expression of concern. I understood them though, they thought themselves superior. They were playing some type of game using optical illusions. Bill was probably attempting to test one of his theories of reality upon me. But I was too smart for them I understood what was going on. I saw through it all. I wasn't going to give them the satisfaction. I sat there quietly but respectfully, pretending everything was fine. What "will" he must have they surely thought. We can not deceive him with our distortions. He can not be manipulated. He is too powerful. His "will" is too strong. So, as the floor changed into some type of floating rubber, I knew it was a ploy and I was not going to me fooled.
As we left the restaurant, I noticed their eyes again were fixed upon me. I am acting perfectly natural, I thought with self admiration. They are looking for a crack in my armor but they will see none. Solid as a rock. It is they who are surely becoming confused. Wondering how I can witness such outlandish illusions and not react to them.
"It is because I am strong," I said as I mounted my bike.
"Are you all right Tim," Bryan asked.
"Of course I am. Is there any reason I shouldn't be," I said restraining my glee.
"No none that I can think of, but you're acting kind of funny."
"So, sorry I will correct myself and become more serious at once, I said letting out a small chuckle.
Bryan expression showed some relief but still looked troubled.
I only wished the others could hear our exchange so they to could see how unaffected I was. But they were now starting their vehicles and seem scarcely aware of our little conversation.
"Are you sure you're O.K. to ride," Bryan asked me.
"Why of course. What a silly question."
"Yeah, right," Bryan said with his relentless peering eyes fixed upon me.
My bike had changed to a raging Stallion, but it was no matter. Somehow the controls were in the same location and it seem to operate in the same manner. What expense and time were put into such elaborate schemes. Other people beside my companions were surely involved. This must be a massive experiment. In a way it was an honor that I was chosen to be the unknowing participant. Ah, but I did know that is where they failed. My horse easily glided pass some human teeth and eyeballs on the road. I laughed into the air with delight.
The highway was becoming increasingly filled with mangled human corpses. Some with half theirs organs stretched across the road were still moaning and crawling toward the shoulder. I knew of course they were not real so I rode my horse straight across their grisly remains. No, they were not real but they were becoming bothersome. When you would ride over the corpses you heard the sound of organs splattering and bones popping. It was quite gory and I was beginning to fear that it may interfere with my riding ability. But, my stallion was gamy and never wavered. She galloped through their bloody remains without so much as a jitter.
I began to have the sensation that on some other level all of this was actually occurring but that's impossible. Right? I mean this can't be happening. The ride was becoming unbearable. What if I was riding over these tortured bodies? Some were still alive was I finishing them of as I casually cruised across their riddled bodies. If so it made be a murder and I was murdering more with every mile. The bodies were scattered across every lane of the highway. I started to attempt to avoid the carnage but it was in vain. My faithful Stallion was becoming increasing hesitant to squash the life out of the frail human bodies. It was bucking and weaving around the corpses. Bryan now pulled beside me. He was riding some kind of loud obnoxious creature that I didn't understand nor wished to. What ever contraption of modern science propelled him across the land, it was obvious it did not belong here. As I gaze into the Western horizon I saw a powerful untamed wilderness. This was horse country. His means of transportation belonged to a different era. It was a blight upon the landscape. Like some kind of crazed predator, that didn't just travel across the land but destroyed it. Devouring it, choking the very life from it. It was like some type of mutation. What predator would destroy the host it fed on. I mean, that goes against ever law of nature . If a predator kills its host, it also destroys itself as a species. I always thought there was a logic to nature...an order, but this well, it was insane.
Apparently, the rest of my fellow travelers saw the madness of the scene. They began singling, making gestures to one another. I assumed they were preparing to take Bryan away from this murderous, mad creature he sat upon. To my horror I saw they to were riding on top of the same foul destructive beasts. These things didn't even resemble life forms. What was happening? Has everyone gone mad?
My fellow travelers were now slowing and motioning me to exit the main trail with them. Perhaps they did understand, maybe they wished to kill the demon beast they rode upon. The others seemed to be frantic in their desire for me to follow them. So, follow I did. We all pulled off the trail and their demonic beast finally were controlled by my companions. I was so glad. Then the most marvelous event occurred the devouring the beast they rode upon were all killed. Whether they died at the hands of my companions or my other means. I do not care their evil roar had ended and that was all that mattered. Suddenly, Bryan appeared beside my fine Stallion and quieted her sweet sound.
"Bryan that was a noble beast. It was not a treacherous Demon like your own."
"Look, I have no fucking idea what you are talking about, but you almost killed yourself on the highway do you realize that."
My other companions now joined Bryan in his hysteria. Oh, indeed they all have gone mad, I thought. Perhaps the strange beast they had rode upon had infected them all. They gathered around me like a pack of crazed jackals. Their voices were loud and inter-mixed. I could make no sense of what was occurring. At least they were now speaking with words even in the confusion of it all, I could hear a few words.
"Well, if nothing else at least you all have ceased communicating my those obnoxious sounds, I said. And you have retained a form of substance much better then gases, I must say."
As I looked at their faces I realized that even though they were indeed using words in their discourse, I was the one who now made absolutely no sense to them. Was it I who was now simply making noise. Perhaps, I had unwilling adapted their earlier forms of communication. Whatever, the case may be they all seem to urgently wished to achieve some unknown objective but they were not working as a unit toward this goal. Bryan and Bill were raising their voices to increasingly higher volumes. As if they thought my simply drowning out the dissenting voices their ideas would be squelched. If it wasn't for the fact that I was becoming increasingly confused, it would have all been delightful amusing.
Confused, ah yes indeed I was but only for a moment. I soon understood their method of manipulating. Their language was all a symbolic, a code. Will I admit they had fooled me for a moment but I was now in tuned with their tactics. I began listening more closely so I could decipher their code.
"Look at him don't you see it. Man, he ain't with us. He needs help. We have to call someone."
It was Tina who spoke these words and I immediately began to decipher their true meaning. I had it an instant, try as they will they could not control me. Tina was actually saying that their attempts to assimilate me to this point had been unsuccessful and they needed advise toward a new method of manipulating. Clever, indeed they were, but I had broken the code and laughed triumphantly to my victory.
"Tim what's your problem? Why are you laughing? Don't you understand anything about what is happening"
Their covert method of communication was reveling itself like a gift wrapped guitar. You can try and disguise with it with the fancy wrappings but its shape always give it a way.
"What's my problem," I said. You don't think I understand what you really mean. Why am I being so difficult to assimilate?
That's what you really went to say isn't it."
My companions understood I had out smarted them. That I had broken their code. They began to speak in whisper. In obvious attempts to hide from my proving insight. It worked too, that is at least somewhat I was still able to hear enough key words to understand their purpose.
"Marty...Well, its only about 50 miles away, call him...No look at him he can't drive....If he rode on the back with one of us he might try and jump off....Marty can come here.....Should we call the police or a doctor or something....Call Marty then we'll all decide.....No, we better not start them again, it seems to disturb him...Across the road is a phone lets walk....We have to take him with us we can't leave him here...Look at him for Christ sake.
Even with their whispers and each of them speaking virtually simultaneously I got the message. Marty was somehow the ringleader and controlled there little brainwashing scheme. The mastermind of the manipulating process, you might say. They planned to call him. It took me awhile to understand that one but then I remembered. In the world of shadows and manipulating images they had a way of transporting voices across great distances. A telephone. I'm sure they thought I had forgotten. By interchanging symbolic messages with archaic words they produced yet another language. But, again I saw through it all.
"Hey Bryan, when you call Marty mind if I use the phone to call Liz."
I knew this would throw them of balance. I gave up a strategic position by making them aware that I had broken the lines of communication,but I figured the shock value would serve to my advantage. I wasn't disappointed the look of; Hey he's on to us radiated from their eyes.
"Why would you want to call Liz, Amy asked in a blatant attempt to uncover just how she felt.,br>
"I don't know, Sis, maybe I just went to see how far your elaborate ploy will go."
After I said this their whispering began again. This time they formed into what looked like a huddle. Yeah, I came a little to close that time, didn't I?
I followed them willingly, happily across the street. It was a street, I realized that now their control over me was breaking. It was some savage demonic beast they rode. They were motorcycles and before I rode my brave Stallion, I too had rode their mechanical horses. Yes, I understood everything now. Motorcycles, telephones apart of a different world, yes, but I could play there too. I was firmly set on their new ground of exploits. Nothing escaped me.
Bryan went to his own phone surrounded my his confederacy of dunces. And, I went to my phone alone except for the ever presence of the annoying whispers. I admit I probably would never have recognize the complexity of their plans if I hadn't needed to walk over to Bryan. I had forgotten the number to Liz but with it that slight set back on my part and served me well. ,br>
My companions had again regressed into their symbolic language but I broke it before and I could again. I would always raise above their worlds of ignorance, when would they learn? As I approached Bryan, I heard his venomous voice say these words: "I don't even think he knows where he is....Oh, dear God no...I'm so sorry...Marty, the news is heartbreaking enough to me I think it would put him over the edge.
"Hi buddy, stranger long lost pal if you need to speak behind my back you should first check to see if my back is turned."
I understood the message Bryan was sending, although I still found it difficult to believe that Marty was their leader. Doesn't know where he is...I knew what Bryan meant. Bryan was saying that I was unwilling to become apart of their world. He felt that I was unable to comprehend their reality but he was wrong. Bryan was very upset that he had failed in his mission to re-program me. There was something else to Bryan's words, a sadness, an expression of concern that was almost touching but it must be apart of their trickery. Their deceit was becoming shameless. Was there no end to their madness?
"Bryan I seem to have lost Liz number do you have it. Something was wrong, I asked Bryan for Liz's phone number but I should have had it memorized. Did, I approach Bryan to discover their strategy, not to get the number? Yes of course, that is what I'm doing, I told myself. I couldn't have forgotten Liz's number. Bryan glared at me like as if I was a pathetic drunk standing outside a liquor store and bumming change for coffee. There was also something else in his eyes, pity.
"Tim, man I think you should just take it easy. Sit down and rest for awhile. This would defiantly not be a good time to talk to Liz."
"Hey, I'm on to you. Do you hear me I'm on to all of you. Now, give me the fucking number. I'm going to find out just how big this conspiracy of yours goes."
"Sure, whatever, I'll write the number down for you."
As I walked away with Liz's number, I heard Bryan calling Amy to the phone. Bryan spoke in a hush tone to Amy before she picked up the receiving. I couldn't make out what was being said. What twisted, diabolic turn was now to unfold in their inhuman experiment. Amy began to cry loudly. At first I was concern but then I realize it was just part of their master plan.
"I am on to you," I screamed to Amy. Everyone can just stop the little serried."
Amy came over to me and placed her hand tenderly on my shoulder.
"Tim, you don't know what you'll saying. You need some time to rest. Something very bad has happened, when you're feeling better we'll need to talk about it."
I brushed her aside, I understood their game.
"I'm calling Liz. I don't think you thought to include her and that will be your undoing."
I dial the number, thinking how easily it was to manipulate and control others.
"Hello, I said to some strange man's voice, is Liz home.
"Yeah she's here, who is this."
"My name is Tim. What's yours? Are you a part of this cruel game too."
"Tim, hey man, its Howard long time. Sorry, I couldn't make it to Dan's funeral. Damn shame, it happened. His family must be devastated."
"Howard? What the hell are you doing there. Have you been briefed on the experiment or are another unknown participate like myself."
"Tim, Liz and I kind of hooked up, you know how these things happen. Hey man, she swore you guys were through."
"Oh, right... I mean we our...no problem. Listen can I talk to her for a minute."
"Sure I'll get her. By the way what's all this stuff about "cruel games" and "experiments"? Are you on something...or what?
"It's complicated, I can't get into right now."
"O.K., no sweat. Listen Tim, we all got together again soon maybe I could score some more 'shrooms."
"Yeah sounds good, talk to you soon."
I was it about to waste any more time talking to Howard. He didn't have the vaguest notion of what was happening. He was just another pawn in the big game. Howard must had been setup there to further test my stress level.
"Tim, is that you," the sweet voice of Liz now said.
"Yeah its me. Listen , are you a part of this too? Has anyone spoken to you about the experiment?"
"Well nice to hear from you too... what the hell are you talking about?"
"The manipulation of reality experiment...don't tell me you're in on it too."
"Look Tim, I was up all last night tripping and my head is a little foggy....maybe you would have made sense to me last night but I got to tell you right now it just sounds like so much noise."
Liz was hearing words as noises. I remember this. That's how it all began, they had gotten to her too. She was a part of the experiment all right but she didn't know it. She was going to be facing hell soon and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I felt sorry for her and for some strange reason I also felt, somehow...I was to blame.
"Liz, sweetheart, I'm sorry...I didn't know. Just remember no matter how they try to manipulate you, it isn't real. Its just on the surface, it has no substance. They're distortions, you can walk right through them."
"O.K., right," Liz said, interrupting my instructions. "Tim next time try calling straight, I don't need this shit right now. I don't feel well as it is, and I certainly don't have time to listen to this crap."
She hung up...but it wasn't her fault, she didn't known. Liz didn't appreciate the complexity of the situation. I debated calling her back but decided she was probably better off on her own. Right, now I wasn't making sense to her, it was to early. Besides, I wasn't sure what she was even being tested for, her role in the experiment may have been quite different then my own. My advise to her could be useless. I couldn't take that risk. I could only pray she would come through it by finding her own way through the maze of illusion. Besides, I couldn't spend to much time on the phone. God, only knows what my companions wicked minds were now
