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"It is a game of secrets in which one must show and never tell."

Some say that life is a game something that must be intricately played through tills the end. When I look at the intricate weavings of words and actions in our lives I see a lot of bullshit. There are times when we feel we must guard and mask our emotions and live as if they do not exist. Don't be afraid to show your feelings someone recently told me. But the truth was so bitter and unspeakable that I couldn’t let what I wanted out. It was a secret that I showed but never spoke of. The trivial nature of things that we experience from day to day seems to be something we can’t escape.

Are there secrets that we hid from even ourselves. We dare not reveal them to ourselves but to everyone around us it is as obvious as a small gasp for air, or a cry for help. The bullshit comes in when the truths end and the lies begin. From telling ourselves a small white lie to hide the fear and emotion we have inside. The line is unseen by ourselves, masked by footsteps that we hurriedly make over that line.

The quote above was told about chess, however how far is that game from life? Don't we spend our entire lives making moves around other people to try to trap or defeat them. Chess is one of the most interesting games I can think of, it embodies all that we strive for in life. Well wasn’t that much better than saying life is like a game of chess. Strategically moving around hoping no one sees our secrets until it is too late.

Shhhhh...don't tell anyone this, but..... The most popular line I have ever heard. We are so concerned with what others might think of our thoughts and desires that we guard them carefully masking what we know to be true in ourselves. Wouldn’t we all be in a mental institution if the world knew of what we thought, and desired? I know that the secret desires that I harbor inside are far from what would be considered normal. However if we all gutted our minds and saw what everyone else hid we would find that we are not as different as we hope to be. We are not as special and individual as we claim to be. Those secrets that are never spoken but seen in the eyes of the desperate are what give us away and connect us to other similar people, whether or not we know it.