People Songs © by Jake_E 1998
All Rights Reserved
Webpage by Jilli / Fate

PEOPLE   SONGS

By:  Jake_E.

She was there and not there. She was there because the lady sang to her. Colors are what the lady had, colors and shape. She knew she was there because the lady sang nice songs about how tall she had grown. Cherry never knew what song to sing. There were always different songs. In the big church the big room filled with song and it all sounded the same. At the same time, it made her head all full. She would sit and listen to the song in the big church and touch the seat. It was soft and hard. Soft the way glass is soft as you run your finger over it. It wasn't the same as the softness of beds and pillows. When they were touched they disappeared. The finger moved in and the pillow would go away where the finger was. No, it wasn't that kind of softness. But it was hard. She would look at the pew and wonder why it changed. Parts where one thing and other parts were something else. Parts where like the door in the classroom. Parts where like the daffodil flowers in the garden.

It was nice songs that the lady sang. Cherry could tell that these songs wouldn't hurt her head. Cherry tried to sing back but was unable. She looked at the top of the lady. She was reminded of the tassels on the cover over the big table at home. They were soft but like the crinkle on chocolate bars but not as much light in them. The cloth on the table was like the lawn but with soft hanging bits on the edge. The lady had marbles. Her cousin had marbles, some like grass. Some like daffodils. Some like sky. He would keep them in a bag and make them sing by moving them quickly. The lady had marbles like sky. Cherry didn't like to see the marbles in people's faces. They seemed to come inside if she could see the marbles. No one was allowed inside, only Cherry lived there.

The source of the songs kept on moving in the lady's face. "Cat got your tongue?" Was the song.

Cherry tried to sing back. "Cat got your tongue" she sang.

"You're a funny 'un alright!" The lady still sang nice songs. "Do you want to stay with us here Cherry?" Cherry liked that song. It had that nice sound in it. "Cherry."

"Nice," Cherry said wanting the lady to sing some more songs with that sound. That sound would sometimes make her head nice. She had learned to look at the shapes that the sound came from when she heard "Cherry." That sound though, didn't always make nice colors in her head. "Cherry you're my special little girl," wasn't the same and made white stars on black in her head. That would make all the shapes move quickly. Like on a train when you put your head against the window and the vibration makes everything blur. "Cherry, this means I love you," Would make everything fill her head. It would fill right up till all the black stopped everything.

"Well," said Cherry's aunt, "looks like she's willing to stay." Fliss, as the family had always called the spinster aunt, leaned forward to give Cherry a hug. Cherry stiffened as hard as iron and started to scream. Fliss moved back instantly and wondered at the seemingly cool way that the child made the noise.

Cherry looked through the blackness that was gathering in her head. Didn't want any more. No more. Stay inside. Retreat. Colors and sounds merged into one until everything inside was soft. Now there was no outside. All the colors were inside. All the sounds made no sense. Shapes formed from the sounds. Songs sprang from the colors. There was no awareness of time or space. There where no smells, no tactile sensations. The barricade had successfully been put in its place. Cherry was safe. Cherry could relax as she wondered about inside contentedly. There was no distinction now between the various inputs from her senses. It all had its familiar security again. She mustn't let the outside in.

Aunt Fliss looked at the now mute child. She told her she was sorry for touching, remembering that she had been told about that little problem. The child standing in front of her made no reply but rather, stood gazing into nothing. In and through her aunt she looked.

"Yes, you're a strange character little cherry," she said thinking that cherry would probably not even hear her. Cherry stood there for about thirty minutes before moving.

Colors where back. World was there. Cherry looked at her and saw nice colors where the songs had come from. She stepped forward to where the lady sat. Putting her hand on the ladies mouth, she said "nice." She turned away toward the fire. It made nice noises. She looked at it as her legs folded underneath her overly thin frame. "Nice," she said to the fire. It had the same color as that on the ladies face. The color filled her head and she felt white. White was nice. The white off the fire made her head nice. The white off the ladies face made her head nice.

"You getting warm now cherry? That's a good girl." She smiled at Cherry as the child looked at her in response to her rhetorical question. "You like smiles don't you Cherry?" Said Fliss, then smiled again and watched as Cherry's neck shortened as she lifted her shoulders, her eyes closing momentarily. "Make you feel warm does it?"

Fliss looked at Cherry and thought how she was there and not there. The poor child was there because she was talking to her but she was somewhere else in her own mind. Fliss felt both sadness and optimism. She felt sad that the youngster had ended up like this but she felt that she wouldn't always be like this. "You'll be safe here Cherry," she said not minding at all that the words would not be comprehensible. She had a feeling that all the child needed was time. "When you're ready Cherry, when you're ready."