Book Reports
By Jonah Winter

II. Babe Ruth

Babe Ruth had two legs on the ground.
He played baseball.
That's because when he was young,
somebody gave him a baseball glove.

He ended up in a hospital bed.
But before that, he had once said
"I never knew you could do something you like
and they would give you money for it."

He was called Babe
because his face looked like a baby.
He had 590 homeruns.

XIII. George Jones

George Jones has been through a lot
according to my father.
He got divorced.
He drank too much beer.

There's a song where he says he
doesn't have any legs
but that's not true -- I've seen him.
He stands up when he plays guitar.

All his songs are sad
but one is about a race.
But it's not a normal race.
There aren't any people or dogs.
The only thing I remember is pain.

XXIII. Albert Einstein

Here's a man who couldn't help but have eyebrows.
He was born inside of a town.
When he grew up,
he wore all sorts of different clothes
including shoes.

One thing that makes him better than other people
is that he could smile
even when he was thinking about really important things.

Sometimes he just sat in front of a fireplace.
That was the night he got up
to look out the window.

When he looked up at the stars
he kept on breathing.

XXV. Wild Bill Hickock

Will Bill Hickock was a man who liked to ride.

Riding allowed him to be as wild as he wanted.

When he rode, he only held on
with one hand.

In the other hand, he carried a shotgun.
He did that so he could shoot it at a buffalo
or anything else.

He was mainly, though, surrounded by miles and miles
and miles.

In the end, he shouted loud and had a beard.

He played the piano with one foot.

XXXII. Paul Revere

Paul Revere had three things wrong with him.
First, he didn't know how to shave.

Secondly, he didn't know how to ride a horse.

And thirdy, and most importantly,
he thought he could do both of these things.

Which caused him to cut his face up
and also fall down a lot.
That's why he rode his horse at midnight.

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