"This Tunnel I'll Soon Regret"

I've known you many years, so grab my hand
And I'll lead you to a forbidden land
Where I am queen;
Have you ever tasted royalty?
It's better than it seems.

I know a place where we won't be found
I know a place that's safe and sound
from the noises of the street above
where hunters pierce the heart of love;

If you can't see just hold out your hand
I've been here times before;
I know the paths through this dark, dreary tunnel,
As if I were a whore;

The sound of water trickling off the smooth walls
Calms my senses and discards my worries,
Like I were its child;
And the muggy air whispers a hum in my ear
Telling me to keep on trudging,
And I listen all the while;

I wonder if you hear these things
Haunting my every step;
And I ponder this thought as I lead you through
This tunnel I'll soon regret;

You ask for a light and I tell you there is none-
Just look to the end of the tunnel
And make one up in your own mind-
That's what I do every time;
And maybe I'll share my dreams with you
When you can see my light
And maybe I'll continue to walk you through
The tunnel of pure delight.

Suddenly I slip and hit my head
And cry out in vain from sorrow,
For it's you I've lost, when I lift my eyes,
It's you I can't face tomorrow;

I wonder where you must have gone.
But the wall feels slippery, like melted human flesh.
And I caress its surface though my fingers are so numb;
I attempt to feel you,
Then realize you've won.

You've melted into the wall at last,
To join in my little cult;
and I've lost the game I always play
and so it's only my fault.
Why couldn't you be different from the others
And have seen the light at the end
When all I wanted was some company
In the tunnel without a friend?

I look up and peer through the disturbing darkness
Into a wall of stone,
For we had reached the end of the walk
Right before you'd disappeared
And I see no light for the first time in my life,
I see no hope in making you real,
I see no use in turning around,
For outside my tunnel of artificial light
I fear I'll never touch ground.

Adrienne E. Helms (nothingfancy@juno.com)

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