Culture Shock

 

I am from Transylvania. Since this is a little corner somewhere in Eastern Europe, in Northwest Romania to be exact, I was expecting to give the routine explanation of my origins, to correct people and let them know, for example, that Bucharest and not Budapest is the capital of Romania. I was also prepared to constantly mention what good places to visit Hungary and Romania are, although the relationship between
the two countries is still like cats and dogs and a war is going on right next door. But when it comes to talking about Transylvania, both Romanians and Hungarians, pour passionate historical diatribes on you about how they were actually the first people in Transylvania, and how this country rich in ore, belongs rightly to them and only to them.
Imagine my surprise when the faces of my new American acquaintances lit up at my "I' m from Transylvania". "Oh, really? How coool!"One of them said that he dreamt of two places to live in: San Francisco and Transylvania. I thought he was just courteous, but when he told me that he called all his friends to tell them that he met someone from Dracula's country, the mystery was solved. We Transylvanians didn' t know we were so popular here.
I am the first in my family who got this far west.
For years I passed by the endless line in front of the United States embassy in Bucharest, reading the postered protests of my countrymen who hadn't got a visa: "I applied for a visa five years ago. My family is there! Why are you torturing us?" "You talk about human rights, but you don' t give visas!" they would complain in capital letters. America seemed so far away. I was thinking people in the line were tougher than I. They were dealing with officials which was an ordeal for me, answering, answering, answe ring. If they succeeded in leaving the country, the relatives left behind had to go through endless interrogations that might end with loss of their jobs, torture or prison.
Now nothing like that happens, but still even the thought of being interrogated gives me cold feet.
I asked the consul meekly for a visa for six weeks and I got one for a year. Waving my passport, I asked my friend to treat me more deferentially because I possessed an American visa. "Don' t boast like that!"he smirked."First I had to l isten to all your enraged pouring about bureaucrats and now your adrenaline got high because of a visa!" Well, he is a Westerner...
I had an uneventful journey, an uneventful arrival, an uneventful stay. People are friendly, generous, talkative. At least with me.
But the human scenery looks different here. The main novelty are the giants, the fat people. "Look, another cubic man is coming!" I said when people as broad as they were tall passed by. My friends sighed:"We are a rich country!"Then they explained that it's the poor who are so fat, because they eat fried food. Tattoos are another story. People turned into exotic marine creatures, their skin covered by blue drawings seeming to reflect the ocean' s color. Then I spotted roses and hearts, sunrises and daggers, snakes and dragons, warriors and lions, skulls and happy faces, even an alien bursting out from a sexy stomach. I was told tattoos are sort of a statement about yourself, not purely body art. Maybe lovers here, instead of looking deeply into each others eyes, just examine one another's tattoos and get turned on. Maybe they no longer say "I see the green of the sea"or "the blue of the sky"or "the mystery of the night in your mesmerizing eyes..." but "Let' s have wedding ring tattoos made." It' s just different, as many other things.
For example I've never heard so much talk about food as here. "The ham I bought is sooo good! And only $37!" "What wonderful catfish and squash they have at the Black -Eyed Pea!" "Let' s go to Red and Blue. The onion loaf is delicious there !"And people would drive to the other side of the city to have it!
I will remember all-you-can-eat-crab-dinners. My nostrils still recall their spicy steam. It was so messy, like in my childhood when I was allowed to eat like a pig. All those people, working so hard, crushing the red and white crabs with wooden hammers, sipped the meat from the legs without any sign of fatigue. I gave up after the third one, and just watched the waitress pour crabs on our table. I was dumbfounded how my companions ate at least twelve of them.
And everywhere there is ice. A glass contains more ice than liquid. My mother wouldn\rquote t believe me that nobody here thinks ice gives you a sore throat and cramps in your stomach.
As to the air conditioning... It is a wonderful achievement. Several times a day I have the opportunity to experience going from a fridge to a sauna and back. Because it is sooo hot!
And the small talk. The small talk is ... fine. Half of the conversation goes on saying nothing. "How are you?" "Fine." "Gooood." " And you?" "Wonderful. But it's soooo hot." "Oooh, yes!" And every second sentence they say "Goood!" or "Very interesting!" If you take it seriously and say you are bad today, you might get smiles and another "Great. Bye!"
I asked my friend why everybody here swims in happy talk. "Would you like to hear that my wife left me and I' m almost broke?" he said. "You' ve got to be optimistic. You' ve got to sugar coat. You' ve got to smile! Why depress the others?"
I thought Romanians to be the most hospitable on earth, but here people are the very best! One day I asked my host where to buy the device to adapt my computer from the European to the American style of plug. I didn' t know what I would get into. The device cost one dollar, but we spent half a day searching for it in several shops and $50 on cabs. Which is nice. I guess this had something to do with the frontier spirit: " Don' t give up! We' ll get it," said my host when I was half fainting in the heat, begging her to go home after two lengthy negotiations with sales people.
I will remember the walk of bricks, in Baltimore near the harbor, where you can have your name engraved for a few dollars to the delight of your enemies who may come and spit and tread on it to their hearts' content. Americans call this cynicsm, but I had a hard childhood without TV psychiatry.
Above all I will remember the walks I took in the poor neighborhoods. All cities have the "window-shop"area for tourists, and hosts usually take you there. But it wasn't hard for me to see the poor side of America, for myself.
When I left Europe, I was expecting people to be mean to me, make fun of my Eastern European accent or try to cheat me out of my little money. At every step to meet robbers with guns, ghost-like drug addicts lying on the pavement, homeless in cardboard bo xes and hordes of prostitutes. And rapists. And serial killers.
I didn' t. So, when Mr. John Cain, a candidate for the Baltimore City Council, invited me to accompany him on an electoral campaign, I hoped I would meet ordinary Americans. In my country the candidates usually announce a public meeting and people come to listen to their platform, ask questions or express their discontent. In America everything is delivered at home, Cain said. If you wait for people to come to hear y our speech, you've lost your voters.
When I saw Mr. Cain in shorts and walking shoes, toting a bag with posters and leaflets, and heard that we'd knock door to door in the "dangerous neighborhood," I felt brave. "I never went to war, but I'm a journalist .. . Here, finally, is the opportunity to meet danger," I thought, forgetting to voice my concern that people wouldn't take us seriously because of his casual attire.
But it was safe, no drive-by shootings, unfortunately, no angry people threatening you. Nothing to write home about.
Like mailmen, the candidate and his team walked up every white, scrubbed step, faced barking apartment dogs, listened patiently to complaints about uncollected garbage and rats. The voters looked familiar to me. The same sad, worr ied faces, some suspicious, some smiling, just like home. I wanted to see more. Next day Mr. Bob Hilson from The Baltimore Sun, drove me on the main street of ???? district. I was told not to stare. People were sitting around - no jobs to go to - some on the steps, some at street corners. One shouted after us "Crack! Crack!" making gestures with his hands as if he was smoking. Two streets down a police car was parked. I asked the policeman why didn't he arrest the drug dealer. "We have no proof." And he drove away. Here I was, telling him I was offered drugs and he just drove away. Glorious moment.
We walked on the street, talked loudly, ate snow-balls, went to see a market half empty where some municipality workers in orange T-shirts laughed in a corner over their hot-dogs, marveled at the acrylic finger nails and the shops with rows of wigs in rai nbow colors. And nobody threatened me. Obviously America wanted to be nice to me this trip so I decided to go shopping at Wall Mart.
There you can stroll and marvel at how cheap is this and that item. For some are really cheap! I, who have no money, could shop here! My tape recorder cost me about $50 at home - a quarter of my monthly income - and here it is $20! The same with underwear. A "satin"set is $8 here and $ 50 there. Last night I had wild dreams about going home through Alaska driving a truck full of underwear.

Written for The Baltimore Sun, but unpublished, Summer 1995
On my website, September 1997

 

 

 

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Ella Veres All rights reserved
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