Thank you for visting this page! I must tell you that Your life as a Christian is going to be hard, but you must stand for the Lord! I am able to share some test and trials that I have gone through to help you. I hope this helps someone!
First of all i grew up Jehovah Witness. I wasnt really rooted in that church. I think we stopped going when i was in elementry school. It wasnt until i met my Boyfriend that i decided to get myself in a church. He told me "Hunny our relationship isnt going to work unless we have the Lord in our lives" So i said ok! I went to Church with him and was saved as of Febuary 2,1997. Then i went searching for a Church because i was in Texas and not in Oklahoma were he was. I ran into a friend at home on the College campus. I told her that i had gotten saved (i was all happy). Then she asked me if i wanted to go to church with her. She said it was a Non-Denominational Church called The church of Christ Jesus. I didnt refuse, and we went to a "Mid-Week" session on a wednesday. I loved the people they were so nice! They asked all about me and seem like they wanted to help me get closer to the Lord. Then i went to a Bible study at someone's house, they then hooked up with me from there. I then went into several Bible studies all in my dorm room. It would be 2 or more of them with me studying with me. They would read scriptures and ask me questions like...a quiz. I gave all the right answers and if i didnt they would ask me more questions to get me to the "right answer". During a visit at the Campus leaders home i was informed that people had refurred to this church as "The Internatinol Church of Christ" Or "Crossroads". She explained to me that they have also been in the news and asured me they were not a cult. So after several Bible studies I was told i could be Baptized at a Women's Convention in Dallas. Well that weekend My Boyfriend D'Mario came to see me get Baptized. We went to a party that night and got in Late. We fell asleep...Not a thing happend. I was suppose to go over to my friends room that went to the same church and stay there But it was really late and i didnt want to wake them up so i slept in my room. Then next morning my friend reported to one of the Campus leaders that i didnt come over and i had slept in the same room with my boyfriend. The campus leader then told me that i could not get baptized. I went to the Confence in tears because i felt like i had let God down. During the confrence she told me she would think about letting me get baptized that day. I was practically begging her to let me let baptized. I was truely sorry for what I had done. She decided that i had to break up with my boyfriend in order to get baptized. So i went back to Campus and broke up with him. My heart was broken both ways. I didnt really want to break up with him but I had to cus that was they only way they would baptize me. That sunday i was baptized. They took us all out to eat. They even paid D'Mario's way too! I was then a Disciple for Christ! I felt hurt, yet happy. D'Mario didnt feel that this was a good Church, but i was told he was making me sin anyway and he didnt know what he was talking about. So i went on with the Church. I got back with my Boyfriend, because i thought that i could help him. The church memebers that were watching over me didnt agree. They told me that i was in Sin and basicly wanted me to cut off contact with him. D'mario and i would talk at night about what scriptures we would read, but they still said NO....
One day i was in the Student Union with some friends and it was almost time for Midweek. I instantly ran out to call my friend to catch a ride with her, because i had no gas to go. I ran back to get my stuff when a woman stopped me and said Tawanna, dont let them push you around like this. If you dont want to go...dont go.
She said you dont have to answer to anyone but GOD. So that day I told my church friends that i had something to do and I would talk to them later. They looked at me like i was crazy and said ok with suspison. I then took my own stand and asked my discipler some questions about the Church. I found out that the church i was in believed that everyone out side the church was going to hell. We were suppose to date inside the church only, and that they were my family. I then stopped going. They called me several SEVERAL times and i didnt return ANY phone calls. Then finally they showed up at my door (my discipler and the campus leader) at 7am! They wanted to find out what was going on. I told them in the nicest way i wanted to look into other churches. The campus leader then got defensive and started to talk rather harshly. She told me that i was acting like a teenager with a crush and needed to grow up. She told me that she thought all i wanted to do was "sack up with D'Mario". She said he was prideful and he wasnt a disciple. She told me that if she didnt see any change in a few weeks then they would consider me "fallen away from God". After a few more harsh words they asked me if they could pray with me. I then said ok... While she was praying she stated " Lord i hope you will use this prayer to HAUNT Tawanna and bring her back to the church". I then ignored the rest of the prayer and started praying my own prayer. I prayed that this would be over soon and that they would leave me alone. That may i had moved to Oklahoma and the disciples on the OU campus began asking me questions and trying to get me to go to their church when i refused they then got mad and acted like the didnt know who i was. I recall on Sring Break in Texas i wanted to go visit my dad in Minnesota or my sister in California, but i was required to go to this Church retreat at the Thousand Oaks Ranch in Corsicana Texas. They made me seem like I was being disobeident if i did not go. I recall the campus leader saying "We are like your family now". They justified me not going to visit my family by, not being strong enough without another disciple with me. In one sitation I told my discipler that I was going to be over a Friend's house, she then asked for her Phone Number so she could reach me there. I was suppose to ask for advice on everything. Which my Friend pointed out to me that all my decisions started with "they said" insted of "I think". I was not one of the favorate disciples they were hard on me and told me i was in sin if i didnt feel comfortable confessing my sins to them. I was in sin if i didnt have contact with them everyday. They point out in Acts where the disciples met everyday and studied, and that is what we were suppose to do. There is much more that went on with this church. I will soon finish what went on. But today i am Happy! I am MARRIED TO D'MARIO! and I have a set of twin girls! We are happy to be in a church that is not condeming and is LOVING.....
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