Another eventful week-end.
On Friday, Dirk and I went out with Katie. We went to Brother's, ate pizza, and talked. Katie and I went into Border's while Dirk napped in the car. We were batting a thousand with conversations that were as poorly timed as possible. For example, we were discussing the relative attractiveness of the Typical Asian Male in the video section. When we turned the corner, I saw that the only person standing near us, who'd had his back to us during the entire conversation, was in fact, an older Asian Male.
That was only the beginning. We then moved onto the topic of Jon (Katie's ex), and the fact that he'd had a comic up in the humor section, but the management seemed to have taken it down. I informed her that the comic hadn't been that great anyway, and started to make fun of the content. We found out a few minutes later that Jon was working, and had been standing about twenty feet away while we made fun of his artwork (luckily, I don't think he heard us).
Then, we saw a calendar dedicated to monkeys, gorillas, etc. I lamented the fact that Koko (the gorilla who knew sign language) wasn't in it, then said, "Isn't she the one who ate her pet kitten?" Katie immediately became mock-outraged, and informed me that Koko hadn't eaten the poor kitten, it got hit by a car, and she was very sad. I insisted that she'd eaten it. Katie and I were running all over the store, whooping with laughter.
We talked in the little café until they kicked us out. We discussed the books we wanted to write, and the fact that somehow, the years that were supposed to be free, perfect, and full of popularity had somehow passed us by. We just skipped over it.
Aaron got robbed. I don't think I mentioned that on Friday. He got robbed Thursday night. He was dropping Sonia off at her house, and a guy came up to him with a gun as he was walking back to his car. He took Aaron's wallet, his leather jacket, his checkbook, and Sonia's portfolio (for her photography class).
Saturday was practice. Remember how sick I was? Doshu got my illness. So he couldn't come. We got to practice late, and Aaron was going to pick up tickets for the Hole/Marilyn Manson show, so he came separately. And, lo and behold, he brought Sonia along. Now, we have a very simple rule in the band. It's alright if you're going to bring people to practice, but you have to warn everyone first. This is from back when Dirk would bring Krisco to practice. He didn't let me know until the morning of practice, and I made a really big stink about it (there's more to the story, but I'm not that bored).
Sonia was there to take pictures for her photography class. I didn't make an issue about her being there when Aaron didn't bother to clear it with me first because I didn't want to be uncomfortable. She took pictures, she said we sounded really good (and she's not the type to give compliments just to be nice). The only thing she said that pissed me off was that she was more worried about her portfolio being lost than the possibility of Aaron getting killed when he was robbed. She stated, "He's alive, isn't he? But my portfolio's gone. But he keeps whining that he could have been killed."
We went out to Applebee's with Aaron and Sonia. I haven't been there since August of ‘97. It hasn't improved in quality. I ordered blackened chicken fettuccine, and it was far too spicy and salty. The waiter was nice, and I got a free dessert out of it. Sonia went out of her way to be pleasant during the meal, I think. She complained about Krisco (called her trailer-park trash, to which I agreed), complained about Roachboy (which I could only agree to, after hearing some of the things he'd said to her about me that he hadn't told me). We also discussed abortion. She doesn't know I had one. I found out a couple interesting things. 1) It is illegal in Virginia to have one under the age of 18 without parental consent. 2) When Krisco (who was seventeen at the time) asked the clinic about this, they simply told her not to mention her age when she came in. 3) Sonia reported Krisco and the clinic for breaking this law. 4) The clinic is no longer in business (I checked). 5) When later discussing the abortion with Aaron, Krisco claimed that she'd "needed" to have one. Sonia violently opposed this claim.
Sunday, I stuck around Dirk's house and napped, a bit. I didn't really wake up until 1 in the afternoon. In the evening, we went to Tower Records. On the way, we picked up Dirk's tape collection from storage. I was amazed at some of the old stuff he had. He even had Afreux Assez, Deb and Dizzy's old band (Dizzy was Roachboy's ex). God, that was depressing.
If innocence and hope and rage could be captured in the sound of a young girl's voice over a banging guitar, this would be it. This was someone else's dream of Utopia, and it's over, too. It was like listening to music written and performed by dead people that you knew. They're nothing like that now, at least Deb isn't. They'll never do anything like that again. It's over. It died.
And only a very few people will ever know that it was ever alive.
I don't think about everything that was lost as often as I used to. I don't think about it very often at all. It's not as sad as it could be, especially when you realize that there's thousands, millions of these Utopia dreams out there. Most of them end without ever coming to fruition. Change is the only constant in the world.
And Deb's content with her life as it is now. I know that. She hasn't picked up the guitar in a long time. She may not ever again. It's secondary (if even that) to her love of computers, and her knack for programming. I don't know about Dizzy. I never really knew her.