<header>Diary 43</header>

03-14-98


Dirk's mother is starting to outdo herself in stupidity. She called my house this morning to tell me that her son is "a rude nasty little ass" and the he'd "better start looking for somewhere else to live." She came to this conclusion because, yet again, she tried to shove Krisco down his throat, and he wasn't having any of it. He told Krisco to leave, because he didn't want her around. And Krisco (as usual) started crying and whining, and hung around until he left to come over to my house.

I think that the next time she calls my house, I'm going to set my mother loose on her. I'm polite to her, just because I'm polite to almost everyone. My mother wouldn't be, and she's psychotic anyway. She'd enjoy making Dirk's mom curl into the fetal position and cry. My mother does stuff like that for shits and giggles.

Dirk had another one of his "episodes" today when we were at the mall. I jokingly told him that I was angry with him, and he went off. This particular episode involved him attempting to walk towards the interstate, so he could "walk home". I'm so sick of this.

Anyway, it wasn't until after I freaked on the highway and almost ran us into the back end of a minivan that he finally decided to talk. By that point, I just wasn't receptive. Do you blame me? This is not a healthy way to express anger. He told me that in the past he'd dated girls who treated him as if he were inferior, and he wasn't going to take being yelled at or treated rudely.

My response?

"Well, it seems as though you arbitrarily decide that I'm yelling at you, whether or not I've actually raised my voice. If I so much as tell you, quite calmly I might add, that I'm angry with you, then you get pissed off at me because I ‘screamed at you'. Also, I don't see why I should have to pay because you were stupid enough to date these bitches. Your method of expressing your anger is unacceptable, and far more severe than what I do when I'm angry."

After this, we sat in my car in an empty parking lot roasting from the sun, while the wind made it 30 degrees outside. He cried, and wouldn't talk to me for a while. I guess he's pretty bad at admitting he's wrong, too. For a few minutes, though, it was as if we were the only people who existed in the world. And we were both miserable.

We're thinking of adding an advice column to our ‘zine. It'll be done by me, but will be under the pseudonym of "Captain Margaret". Theoretically, we'll give advice to people who need it. The reality is, we'll laugh at their problems, and write responses that make fun of them. It's a pretty good idea for a giggle. Maybe we'll actually get real people to submit their questions (although I don't know why they would), so we don't have to make up all of the questions ourselves.

I wasn't the one who came up with the idea. Dirk was. Sometimes I think he's a bigger sociopath than I am.

I've got a whole list of books I want to buy from Tower Records. There's just so much neat-o stuff I don't have the money for. Maybe if I sold my parents.....but no. They'd probably be shitty about that sort of thing, and write me out of their will or something drastic like that. I also want a "Hello Kitty" mug that I saw there. I'm planning on going back tomorrow to get it.


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