<header>Diary 51</header>

03-23/24-98


Theoretically, now that I've found a definite goal, I should be content. Why aren't I? For those of you not inside my mind, I've decided to finish my novel (which I've been workinng on for six or seven years, and I'm going to try to transfer to GMU. Worthwhile, respectable goals.

Of course, theoretically, I should have a brain buried somewhere in this thick skull of mine...I've proven in the past that I don't. At least, not all the time. Maybe it migrates.

(Tuesday) Yet another day where my mother went ballistic. There's something very, very wrong with that woman, I swear. Maybe she's secretly related to Krisco. She was demanding my professors' phone numbers, so she could discuss my performance in my classes so far (in other words, make sure I'm going to class, etc.). She almost foamed at the mouth when I informed her that my professors' wouldn't discuss it with her, because she's not me. I'm not in high school anymore, and I'm the one paying for my tuition. I also got to make a bunch of smug remarks about the fact that I was being kept from studying by the fact that she was freaking out.

I've heard a lot of people say that I should respect my mother no matter what she's done. That's bullshit. My mother has a serious chemical imbalance that makes her mean, sadistic, smug, cold, hateful, and just plain spiteful 95% of the time. She feels that my only worth is how much I can contribute to society. She also has a really twisted sense of humor. Mix that all together, and you've got someone I wouldn't want to associate with, much less be related to.

I found another Kerouac poetry book, "Pomes All Sizes". I love Kerouac, even though most of my friends don't get it. I could break my bank account buying his books, considering how expensive they are. "City Lights Books" must be making quite a killing from his stuff.

Supposedly, Krisco is leaving Dirk alone...that's good. I'd hate to have to kill her. I need to send Ken the letter where I explain that I'm not going to send back his stuff until he starts paying me back the money he owes me. He's gonna freak.

I nearly finished the articles for the "Ask Captain Margaret" column. All it needs is for Katie to finish one part (since she basically wrote the response anyway), and we're all set.

I'm waiting with baited breath for Deb to call me with directions to Virginia Tech. Hopefully, she doesn't forget that Dirk and I are coming....


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