Illustration : Pierre Joubert

<<Louni, come to me at this moment! >>

With a very high voice Louni’s mom Monika screamed at him.

<<What is it mom, what do u want? , Why the hell are u screaming? >>

Louni said.

<<I said get down to here at this minute>>

Louni’s mom screamed again.

<<Ok>>, Louni said with an upset voice,

<< I am coming>> he said again.

So louni wore before he came to his mom a pink jeans with a pink sweater,

It matches a girl more than a boy! , Louni was an incredible looking guy, his beauty was mixed with girls’one.

He had a very smooth body and a very long dark hair, every girl wished to have a hair like him , their touch was like silk .

He went down stairs to his mom to see the problem and suddenly MONIKA screamed:

<<What the hell did u do last night? >>

<<What? What happened this time? >> Louni asked

<<You bastard, our neighbor saw you wearing a short last night in the university and u were showing your legs to everyone! >>

<<So, what is wrong with that? >> Louni asked

And Monika said with anger:

<<For who did I deliver life to? , For a boy or for a girl? And when the hell will u stop acting like girls? >>

<<I think when I’ll die >> Louni answered with an ironic way.

So his mom asked him in an ironic way:

<<So do u want to put lipsticks and make-up too? >>

<<Why not? That will be great >>

Louni said with a laugh

<< u are punished and that is it ! , u wont see television anymore until I say so>> Monika screamed these words with a high voice .

<<Like I care! And mom I think that I am a gay >>

Louni said these words like he didn’t care.

<<u bastard , I wish that u were never born! >>

Monika said .

Louni went up stairs and he sits on his bed, he looked to his face in the mirror,

He cried a little bit , he said to himself in a low voice

<< Why doesn’t anyone respect me? , Why can’t anyone love me? >>

Well Louni was very attractive even in the university and everyone noticed that he had a beautiful body, great legs, sexy lips, and every damn boy don’t stop staring at him until their girlfriends come and they try to ignore him by kissing their girls.

Louni always felt that he will be in the second place , no matter how he will look like or he’ll act.

He was jealous from girls, from the way they look and from the way they get tender and love and respect and the interest of a man .

The poor Louni tried to avoid sex and his jealousy by studying hard all the time and he succeeds in it, he was very brave and intelligent in his class .

He didn’t have friends or true friends because he just can’t be a man .

What can he do? He hates to be with a girl and he likes men but men like to be proud of how they fuck their girlfriends and who’s one is sexier than who.

Sometimes he get so happy when someone touch him in his legs and his face but fortunately , they are just laughing at him .

He just couldn’t understand that some straight are rude not all of them .

Every day passed and Louni is getting sexier and more beautiful than the other day and he is getting more freedom from his parents who can’t controls him anymore !

He was getting a great grades in his university that most of the students in the university are unable to face his high grades , in his university that most of the students in the university are unable to face his high grades , he just felt himself in injustice world , where he couldn’t find love and respect and he is trying to ignore this feeling by studying all the time!.

Now he is getting more interested in the university cause every girl is seduced easy there but it is not the case of Louni ,he just ignored all guys and he considered that they didn’t exist

And because Louni was very sweet and smooth and because he is refusing to talk to any guy ,

He gets without noticing it the interest of all the guys in the university.

One day , Louni have finished his courses of math , he went out to a restaurant so he can eat , he was starving and suddenly , there were a man in the age of forty five years old who came to him and in a strange way , the two of them opened a conversation .

The man’s name was David .

David asked:

<<what is your name boy?>>

Louni said with a smile :<< my name is Louni sir , and what is yours? >>

And David said with a smile : << mine is David , how old are u? >>

And Louni said with a laugh :<< well as I remember I am about 19 years old>>

And David asked him a lot of questions concerning his life , about the way he lives and the object that he has been studying it.

And then David asked this question that it will push Louni to confine that he is a gay :

<<how are girls ? are they pleasing you a lot?>>

This question was like a shock to Louni that he even gagged when he heard it . He felt he was insulted , so he stood up in a fast way and he tried to go out from the restaurant but David held his hands with force and stood up too , and he looked at his face and he told him :

<< I want u now! >>

Louni was shocked , he didn’t know what he was doing , he found out that he wasn’t at home this night and he didn’t inform his parents , he found himself in David’s appartment .

He took his hands and he touched his face and they made love all the night .

Louni fell in love with him , it was the first time that he knew the meaning of sex , of love , he spent lovely days with David.

But Louni started to lie on his parents by telling them that he is going out with friends and he changed a lot.

He started to smile all the time , he wore sexy clothes and he was all the time thinking about David, David was the man of his dreams but unfortunately David had to travel to his wife in Paris, yes ! , David was bisexual and he told Louni about himself later and he told Louni that he would like to keep him for himself too.

Louni cried a lot when he knew that David was bisexual , he just felt that he was unlucky in life .

When David traveled to Paris , Louni was beginning to forget David even that he shared with him love .

Louni was a good boy , he didn’t want to destroy a family or to be the cause of its destruction and especially David’s one because he loved him , he was trying to ignore David’s calls all the time .

One day Louni was sitting on a chair in the university , he was studying like usually and he saw a boy and a girl kissing each other in the secret ,

Louni looked at them but in his heart he wished if he was this girl but suddenly the boy who were kissing the girl looked at Louni and knew that he was watching them , the boy stopped of kissing the girl and then the two went from the sight of Louni,

After an hour the boy who was kissing the girl came to Louni and said to him:

<< hello >>

Louni said in a fast way : << hi >>

Than the boy said to Louni : << my name is Johnny , and hey man! , she is my fiancée >> .

Louni looked at him in uninteresting way and he said : << ok >>

Than Johnny asked :<< what is your name ? >> and Louni answered : << Louni >>

Johnny said : <<u have a pretty name like yours >>

Than Louni stared at Johnny , he found out that Johnny was an incredibly sexy guy that every single girl would love to be with him , he was tall , he had a short dark hair , blue eyes with a sexy body , he is extremely handsome then they spoke a lot together .

Johnny spoke to Louni in a man way and Louni spoke to him in a sweat way , Louni thought that he found the man of his dreams .

And then Johnny invited Louni to an hotel room so he can fuck him , and it was the most incredibly night that Louni spent in his life even Johnny said that he had a mouth better than Carlina his fiancée ,

And Johnny said to Louni that he loves him a lot and that he wants him to be for him and only him.

After a several weeks, Louni felt in love with Johnny . He considered him as his man , but Johnny avoided to speak to Louni in public until one day , when they were together in bed , Louni wore his clothes and kissed Johnny and told him: << come on my love , wear your clothes , I am so hungry , I want to eat , I am starving ! >>

And Johnny looked at Louni while he was sitting naked in his bed and he answered : << my love , you must eat alone tonight , I must go to my fiancée Carlina >>.

Louni said with a surprise :

<< what? You promised that u will eat dinner with me , I exposed myself to danger for u , I lied to my parents just to be with you and to enjoy staying with you ! >> , and Johnny stood up and said with anger :

<< look Louni , u must understand the reality here , I am normal , I want to get married with Carlina and to have children with her and to be a man and to give these children my name and they will represent me in this world after I’ll die >>.

Then Louni had a headache , no a terrible headache like the whole world is against him.

And than Johnny continued :

<< u know , I want a women , who will take care of me for the rest of my life but of course you’ll be always mine , whenever I get bored from Carlina , I’ll come to fuck you , because I just like sweetness , whenever I am horny , I just will call you so we can meet in bed but you will be always mine because I don’t like to share you with others , it will be disgusting , and you know I am really enjoying fucking you.>>

and then he continued in an ironic way:

<< u know , when I saw you , I knew you were a fag , I just wanted to fuck you , but you are so good , that is why I want to keep you always mine.>>

Louni’s eyes begun to turn to red , he wanted to cry from his misery , he just ran out from the room while he was crying , he didn’t care about Johnny who was screaming and calling him to come back .

Louni went to his car and he drove back to his home .

When he reached his parents’ home, he found his mom and his father sitting with a priest , his mom was very angry and she asked: << where were you Louni? >> but Louni didn’t answer at all and then the priest told Louni in a straight way: << look Louni , we don’t want troubles , there is a man called David , the lover that u were ignoring him , he dropped us a mail by accident and we know everything about u ,and sincerely if u wont get out from the university , I’ll tell everyone about you , trust me! Leave to another university , we don’t want fags in our university but I am here now , to ash your parents if they can give us an amount of money so we can forget the whole thing , so what do u think? >>

And Louni said with a smile : << u can go to hell ! >>.

And then his mother stood up and said:<< u are a shame on the family , I wished that you were never born , get out from my sight now! >>.

And Louni run to his car , he drove to a high mountain ,then he wanted to push himself from the edge of the mountain so he can rest in peace .

He walked right to the edge of the mountain , he looked down , the tears were all over his face , he was crying because he knew that he will die then he saw a light of a car and a man who was running toward him , oh! , it was Johnny , he went him all the time .

Johnny said:<< my love Louni , please come to me , I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings , it is life , please don’t hurt yourself >>

Johnny said these things like he was bagging Louni but it was to late .

Louni looked down , he saw himself like he always wanted to be , putting make-up on his face ,he saw himself smiling ,he was telling himself to get down and when he looked back the images of his mother came to his head when she said that she wished that he was never born and the images of Johnny when he said that he meant a bitch to him ,

Louni stepped toward the edge and he felt down .

He died , the blood was all over his pretty face but he was smiling when he died and all that you can hear is Johnny’s voice screaming : << no , my love ,come back to me, somebody help me >>

And than I only ask you , who must we blame ?

Is it God ?

Is it the devil ?

Or is it the society ?

It is for you to decide .

It was written by chaya-foufou

Do tell me about your opinion.

"A map is not the territory". Alfred Korzybski

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