This new section will be devoted to a chronology of the strange people that I seem to attract. No one knows why these people are drawn to me, why they feel a need to tell me odd things or involve me in their bizarre behavior. All of these stories are absolutely, one hundred percent true (unfortunately). In some cases, some people might think the behavior described here is perfectly acceptable. I assure you it's not.
And so, without further ado, allow me to present:
June 9, 1998
June 7, 1998
On my way to a bus stop, a man followed me for half a block saying what sounded like "Are you going to school? It's the season for it. Are you going to school? It's the season for it." When I refused to answer him, he laughed and started singing "Volare" at the top of his lungs.
Whilst at my local movie theater to see "Hope Floats," I sat next to the ginger version of Norm MacDonald who insisted on trying to eat some of the burrito I had so assiduously snuck in. When I refused, he insulted my upbringing and proceeded to provide me with a running commentary throughout the movie which he thought starred Julia Roberts.