Introduction
by Corwin
The Plug is not a school sponsored paper. It is the wishes of the writers that their opinions be heard at CHS. This is not a "satanic cult burn your dog eat your children" paper, not is it a "happy joy love the world" paper. This is a free forum in which to express views, nothing more, nothing less.
We expect this paper to promote thought, discussion. Talk about what you read here. Be angry if you are offended. This is the nature of things.
For your protection, profanity has either been edited out or articles, or "nullified" (by plcing underscores over 95% of the word). This allows us to still publish the author's work with his/her intended presentation form, without offending your vocabulary.
Introduction/2
by The Lunchman
The Plug is here. Not for some trumped up "high and mighty" purpose. Only to spit in no one's face, and to listen attentively to the sound of one hand clapping. This is a piece of paper suitable for the bottom of the birdcage. This is a paper for those who remember what the doormouse said. Don't expect regular issues. The Plug has no forwarding address. It exists in a nebulous state ricocheting from dreams to vapor.
"Nothing is true -- Everything is
permitted"
- Hassan i Sabbah
Discussion
Unholy unions in the
cafeteria
by Corwin &Yoshi
Corwin: "If you've ever been in CHS's cafeteria, as the majority of us have, you probably noticed large "social groups" of people. Territories being marked. I got the strange feeling that it was one step up from wolves urinating on the ground to mark their area.
Violence predominates the attitudes of some of the groups. Why can't they just cool down their egos and have a good time? It's a time to relax. A time to eat. A time to pray (for some). A time to hunt and gather. A time to cheat on yoru -- whoa, getting a little ouf of hand, aren't I?"
Yoshi: "I chuckle at this topic, since the students who present this b___s___ have no brains themselves.
A real good example is an experience with myself and my friends in the cafeteria of Corvallis High School; a small group of students didn't like the fact that one of my friends took a chair at their table which was "theirs." Define theirs; if they pay taxes, by all means, they can claim the chair. If they do not, then what the f___? I can't understand why someone would mark their territory, espescially in the cafeteria; like Corwin's analogy; wolves pissing to mark their territory. It's crazy, it's truly crazy. If they want to BUY a chair, by all means, then can; and no one will sit in it (I sure as hell wouldn't). It's not worth getting all pissy and fussy about; it's a damn chair. It's not territory; It's a public education. If we had marked territory for "Gangstah Wanna-Be" people, "Jock-Football" people, "Sterotypical nerd" people, and "Freaks with red hair and chains" people, the world would be so much easier and physical violence would sure be a lot more reasonable, would it not? Too bad the world doesn't work this way; it's not an issue of territory anymore, we'll leave that up to the gangs in Los Angeles, but it's rather an issue of reality vs. proposed-property? What is this, the pecking order of social status? I'm not sure; what I am sure of is that these people really need to take a Sociology class and realize, "Hey, there's more to a community than wearing starter jackets or parkas and thinking we're the bad-a__ed dudes from Corvallis, Oregon!" - Get a grip, guys, and I'm even willing to pay for the treatments..."
Corwin: "As always you seem to take a rather, well, offensive position, Yoshi. What I can't see is why we talk about people being violent towards "outsiders", when we are just as bad, only verbally. The solution to the problem isn't going to be found by bad mouthing the entire population."
Opinion
Projection or
freedom of speech?
by Yoshi
Hmm... after flipping thru the articles of the Corvallis High School High-O-Scope, Vol. 73 No. 13, I was quite disgusted with the Letter to the Editor reply from Ms. Harris...
What I'm internally debating is if Ms. Harris has the right, as a student, to express her feelings of Christianity within the school paper via what I call "forceful projection." To summarize, I feel Ms. Harris is not explaining WHAT Christianity is, but rather telling the reader what is or is not right or wrong. I feel that no one is right, nor is anyone wrong in anything; this outlook may seem "outrageous" or "silly," but think about it. Anyone in the United States can do what they want; I theoretically could kill 300 people if I wanted, as could anyone else. The catch is you end up getting put into prison; but this does not stop anyone from doing anything.
I look at this point from both sides, unbiased as possible. Ms. Harris has the right to express her outlook and beliefs whenever or wherever she feels like. What I feel she does not have the right to do is "forcefully project" her ideals upon other members of the school, including staff members. There is a vast difference between projection and explanation; one is forcing someone, the other is revealing the true definition. I can explain how I feel that Christianity is wrong, in my eyes, hut I cannot tell someone that it is right or wrong for people as a whole or for each individual. This would be, like I said, forceful projection.
From the other point of view, all Ms. Harris was doing was explaining her experience with being Christian and how Christianity works for her as an individual. There's nothing wrong with this at all; it's definition projection. I don't see any problem with that.
For those of you who must know my personal opinion on this type of issue, I would say that I feel Ms. Harris' explanation on how Christianity is the solution to the world is wrong. No one, no thing, nor anything can force me to think a certain way: Ever. There may be limitations on what I can do, or even what I can say. No one can stop how I think, nor will I try to force anyone else to think a certain way either. In summary, take your Christianity elsewhere. No one wants to be preached to; we just want the actual definition of Christianity, not the definition plus a personal vendetta against Del. Let Del alone, and let the rest of us alone with your personal feelings on Christianity: Just tell us the truth; I know for a fact no one wants to listen to a biased opinion these days: I speak for youth as experiences has proved, not as myself. I can speak for myself when it comes to feelings; when it comes to forceful projection, I will raise Hell.
The Morning News
by Corwin
I don't know about the rest of you, but the only change I get to hear about what's going on in the world is the morning news and the sunday paper. It's tough to find out who's killing who when you're burried under work constantly.
The news has gotten to be such a crock. Not to name names, but there is a certain morning newsperson (we'll call her Katie X) who just can't seem to put the world's affairs ahead of her (in my opinion) terribly overdone looks. When someone has to fake emotion and try to suck the viewers into depression just to make a point, this isn't news, it's brainwashing.
And one of her fellow newspersons, a fellow by the name of Bryant X, seems to try to take on the personality of the concerned male. For example, when he got the chance to conduct a face to face interview with Ross Perot, his personal views obviously got in the way with rude lashes out at him.
Even this morning, Katie X was interviewing Vice President Gore (via those nifty TV camera setups) at the recently resontructed Santa Monica Interstate 10 overpass (damaged during the earthquake). Gore seemed very excited about the project, since it was finished 70+ days ahead of schedule (due to a landmark method of interaction between federal government, state, and private contractors). But all Katie X could do was cut him off and ask about Bosnia.
I can see why she needed to do this. What I can't see is why, after trying to break his good spirit, she attacked him about President Clinton's taxes from fourteen years ago! This makes me tend to think that if any of us plan to run for office, we'd better make sure we turn in our books in on time, or else we may be attacked on national television.
Humor
Things
we think about...
by Corwin
We saw Elvis at Circle K™
Where do Pop Tarts™ come from?
How much Pepsi™ can you drink before you die?
Do Taco Bell™ burritos really have rat meat in them?
Where can you buy old tin cans in bulk?
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop™?
Can you die from wearing Cub Foods teal green outfits?
Good and Bad Things
by Corwin and Random
Spam™ is a Good Thing.
Smelly sneakers are Bad Things.
Paper is a Good Thing.
Dunk-a-roos™ are Bad Things.
Coolwhip™ is a Good Thing.
Trademarks™ are Good Things.
Pizza is a Good Thing.
Parking tickets are Bad Things.
Chinese take-out is a Good Thing.
Law of Conservation of Mass is a Good Thing.
Having all your hair fall out is a Bad Thing.
LunchTime Horoscopes
by The Lunchman
Aries (March 21 - April 19):
Focus on wallpaper. Virgo will be involved in riot,
possibly with you. Lifestyle change may occur. Meeting with Leo
in laundromat. Don't eat the fish.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20):
You will receive money from a person who will take some
convincing. The police will fingerprint you. Get a lawyer. Soon.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20):
Concentrate on blood ties, and humor. Don't be afraid to
speak your mind. Avoid Scorpio at all costs. Expect new
friendship. Have wallet ready.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22):
Cats will invade home. Secret message will indicate when. Look
for Libra with key. Give in to stress at final point. Have
strength. Be self-indulgent. Steal laughing gas from dentist.
Leo (July 23 - Aug 22):
Crouch in a corner and hide. Cover face with hands.
Everyone is out to get you. Buy Kevlar vest. Learn how to
knife-fight. They're following you right now.
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22):
All problems will be solved. Pisces will shun you. Loose
enthusiasm. Life sucks, and you know it. Drink lots of bad
coffee. No lattes or mochas. Try burned pot scum.
Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22):
The universe expands with opportunity for you.
Everything will work out. Your S.O. won't strangle you. You won't
loose your job. Just don't drive through that minefield.
Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 21):
You will hear inner voices. Listen to them. Follow their
advice. You will prosper. Check into mental hospital. Revel in
your schizophrenia.
Sagittarious (Nov 22 - Dec 21):
Listen to rock music until you hear the satanic message.
It's there. Trust the stars. Ancient Greek Cancer will possess
body. Enjoy the experience.
Capricorn (Dec 22 - Jan 19):
Your car will break down. You will be cursed by the Ka of an
Egyptian mummy for disturbing it from the Western Lands. Run like
hell.
Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18):
Cycle indicates goodness, maybe badness, maybe love,
maybe hate, signs mixed. Serious involvement with Aries on street
corner. You might read a newspaper.
Pisces (Feb 19 - March 20):
Emotions dictate actions. Possible destruction of United Nations
building. You might be in it. Don't panic. Destiny can't be
avoided. Buy a plane ticket to Rio.
Retractions
by The Lunchman
The editors would like to express condolences to all bald staff members. There was no malicious intent of the article in the previous issue. The Plug only wished to discuss the issue of hair loss in a restrained public forum. The Plug is horrified that somehow our planned article was replaced by a cruel parody. The Plug never intended to equate bald pates with inverted sattelite dishes. It was the work of a saboteur. The Plug feels ambivilent, but a few nondescript green slips of paper could swing the mood to regret. Thank you for your time.
This paper will self-destruct in 25 seconds.
The Plug is a Bi-weekly
publication published by The Plug Press.
(C)1994 The Plug Press.
Produced by Corwin.
Writers: Corwin, Yoshi, Random, The Lunchman.
Editors: Corwin, Yoshi, Random
Trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
You shouldn't read all the fine print.