Jeanine Garofalo
Calculated frump. Utterly unfunny. She was, however, unintentionally hilarious during her saturation talkshow and news program appearances protesting the Iraq war, doing her usual shtick ... admiring herself as she smugly sprays words while saying absolutely nothing.

Kevin Smith
He proves the point that Gen-X has nothing to say for he stated that he may make only ten films [merciful gods!] because he may "run out of things to say." After his shit-monster in 'Dogma' I kinda think he said it all.

Ann Coulter
A once minor functionary for Gingrich leftover Spencer Abraham (the toadlike former 1-term Senator) who proves that self-promotion can take you anywhere - including the halls of media power ... oh, and look for the irresponsible ranting cunt's new book (she praises Joe McCarthy!) which doesn't seem too concerned with things like historical fact HOW COULTER GOT FIRED

Pit Bulls and Rottweilers
The trend toward macho posturing passed to pets as well as weak people needed to use animals to project an image of strength, and vicious dangerous dogs were purchased as props for Gen-Xers to pose with ... unfortunately these dogs regularly kill children and maim adults.

Pierced Tongues
The stupidest conformist trend in the history of humanity.

Alexander McQueen
She saw one Gary Numan video and thinks she's a designer. Such a rip-off of early 80s music videos. Such utter junk. The Brits are hopelessly trendy.

ALF and ELF
What is their "front"? ... stupidity? They've freed linx (or minx, who the fuck can remember?) only to have these territorial animals rip each other to shreds. And they've burned down a ski lodge and homes under development, only to have more resources consumed and energy used (which creates pollution) to have their arson damage rebuilt. Geniuses these people are not.

Paul Thomas Anderson
Boy he fools a lot of people who think him a film auteur. In reality, Anderson makes overlong, downright tedious films, which simply seek to relive his fantasy of what he thinks the 70s San Fernando Valley may have been like. True to Gen-X form, he picks ugly colors, ugly locales, dubious subject matter and weirdly unrealistic characters to fill his movies. The dumbed-down, tasteless Gen-Xers he makes his films for actually stood and applauded the first run of 'Boogie Nights' ... while I and the handful of others with taste sought to get away from these 'Rent' rejects a.s.a.p.

Spike Jonze
I'm convinced Jonze's sole influence in setting his visual style is hours and hours and hours of Mannix reruns. He, like Anderson, loves brown, and concrete and the negative space of the 70s visual aesthetic (like all those freeway shots from CHiPs). His home movie of Al Gore for the 2000 Democratic Convention was a travesty, and Kenna a trendoid for ever arranging it for her Dad.

Bret Easton Ellis
What to say about this perveyor of sewage? He is an effeminate, smug little twerp, with no discernible literary skill, who has made a career out of his base and vulgar written scribblings.

Andrew Sullivan
Lispy smugness is not pretty. After getting exposed for posting an ad seeking uprotected anal sex on Bareback.com (or something similarly named) ... the public hasn't had to put up with his whiny right-wing apologies for Republican policies (or the damn plaid shirts) as often since he doesn't book much TV air time now ...

Matt Drudge
Rich and famous yellow "journalist." An early web entrepeneur, Drudge almost single-handedly started the wasteful debacle (money, time, reputations) of the Clinton impeachment over the Monica Lewinsky affair. Drudge has no formal journalism training, but now earns millions and is treated like a pundit on par with Washington pros who've worked the town for decades. New, lower standards indeed! He once admitted to homosexual "experimentation" and in the interest of equal [prurient] time, I think Clinton supporters would like to know, Matt, ... were you bottom?

Jack Black
Not since Boomer James Belushi has someone so singularly untalented come along to hog up so much media space. Black is not good-looking, has no discernible talents, and is not the least bit amusing - despite his manic energy putting forth his over-the-top children's level shtick. Oh, by the way, your band sucks too Jack.

Monica Lewinsky
Unlike Judith Exner, who knew to keep her mouth shut, this tubby cocksucker blabbed to 13 of her closest girlfriends that she was giving oral pleasure to our then president and thus gave the right-wing asshole Republicans all the ammo they needed to precipitate a constitutional crisis. Emblematic of the utter cluelessness about social responsibility and propriety Gen-X embodies.

Puffy Daddy, P Diddy, Sean Combs, etc.
The ghetto-speak is a put-on as this guy was educated in good Catholic schools. He is responsible for one good thing: helping to establish the career of Mary J. Blige. Otherwise, he's just a clown (one that gets himself involved in shootings at nightclubs, mutliple stop-light runnings, near-deadly assaults on record executives, and now owning the company that uses sweat-shop labor - oh, and my favorite ... he has big soirees and then tells people on the invitations what to wear, what to drive, and how to act ... see Smoking Gun).

Eminem
How anyone can take this little trailer trash twink seriously is just baffling. He has a lot of attitude, but not a discernible trace of talent. He is a 30+ year old man who acts like a junior high school student aged 13 or 14. He represents the nadir of Gen-X artistic output. For an absolutely hilarious critique of Eminem, visit this movie review of his 8Mile from Betty Bowers. ------- Read my Ode to Eminem

Quentin Tarantino
Although I like Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, and simply loved Kill Bill Vol. 1, Tarantino makes is here because of the ear-cutting scene in Reservoir Dogs. Despite whatever good one can say about his filmmaking talents, this one act makes him a cultural criminal - fully reflecting Gen-X's new lower standards. That scene transformed cinema. It was so exceedingly well done - the reality and visceral nature of the horror of the act so fully realized - that it stretched the boundaries of what an audience would find acceptable in terms of screen violence. Is that a good thing? It wasn't the chop-socky cartoon violence of Kill Bill, rather this scene was sensualized, and perverted the horror of the violence. And to what artistic end? Further, Tarantino is more than just a geek, he is a social retard: Rolling Stone reported that Tarantino said 9/11 didn't affect him except that he enjoyed showing visitors to his home a Hong Kong film which has a scene similar to that of the 9/11 attacks. He wouldn't tell them such a scene was in the movie. This sums up what is wrong with Gen-X. They try to make even the most serious issues trivial, disassociate themselves emotionally from that which is meaningful, try to hipsterize everything. The 'too cool to care' posture, the affectation of being emotionally unaffected. This story says it all.

Sarah Silverman
Another Gen-X comic who is not the least bit funny. When she made racist comment about Chinese people, in an utterly lame attempt at Gen-X level humor, she wouldn't retract it nor acknowledge her transgression. Further, like so many no-talent Gen-Xers, she is strangely smug beyond words.

Fred Durst
His crime was denigrating the memory of Woodstock. He was shouting (you can't really call what he does singing) "break something!" and the hideous mud-soaked Xers followed his commands, and the grossly over-merchanidized over-priced Gen-X coroporate version of Woodstock descended into a fiery riot. Further, the SUV-driving Durst is overly smug and kinda ugly too.

Kathy Griffin
* REDEEMED! *
I don't know a person who's ever laughed once at her boring attempts at comedy. She's of the loud-and-brassy-tough-chic school of comedy. Game attempts don't equal actual talent. Not quite as annoying as Judy Tenuta, but close. WHO KNEW?! SHE SUDDENLY GOT A LOT BETTER. HER NEW STANDUP AND SHOW ARE VERY FUNNY.

Luke Sissyfag
This little feminine queer appeared at a Clinton speech, while Clinton was president, and heckled him about AIDS funding. The heckling was inappropriate as Clinton had already dramatically altered the nation's policies to provide more funding and presidential attention to the health crisis. Sissyfag persisted, and Clinton allowed him to speak. The little twerp got media attention for a while, but wasn't truly informed on AIDS issues and the whole escapade was really about a needy queen getting attention. Not wanting to give up the spotlight but wanting to ditch the catchy name, little Luke changed his name to something I can't be bothered remembering and switched to animal rights activism.

Alanis Morisette
I happened to catch the premiere of her breaththrough video (you know, she's wearing white and the video has blurry orange filters muddying the images) ... which I really liked. But that was her one good song. Everything she's done since has been from the lamb-in-heat school of vocalizations Gen-Xers seem to just love. They mistake bad singing for plaintive wailing. It just sounds whiney and awful, but Xers gobble it up.

Ice Cube
Phony. That one word sums him up. A ghetto poet? Get real! He's a kid from a nice family from an urban/suburban kind of upbringing. He lived around gangbangers and saw a lot, but that scrunched up face he does to project toughness is just that - a projection. He's more like 'doughboy' than a tough guy. And his lyrics!?! I saved an old interview he did many years back from the LA Reader. They called him the poet laurete of rap. I read all 8 pages of this BS and the telling exchange was this one: Q: "Why don't you put the political messages in your songs on the records into your live shows?" A: "People come to hear the muthafucka bitch boom-boom." Says it all. When he has a captive audience he could be imparting a valuable political message to, a la Malcolm or Martin, he instead takes the low road to vulgar entertainment. Meaning: he doesn't really mean it. And that equals fraud.

Billy Corgan
His horrid whine and snivel is the male equivalent of what Xers seem to like about Alanis's voice - it's supposed to be emotive and plaintive and expressive in a raw kind of way, but I'm convinced if a good sound engineer set up a wave dislpay of his vocal output it would show that most of his vocalizations fall outside the range of what the human ear finds pleasurable and into the zone of noise.

Ecstasy
Leave it to Gen-X to make their drug of choice one which has been known to cause actual brain damage (and this fact was known almost from the beginning). Completely inorganic and dosage-risky every time, Xers gobble these pills up, and after perhaps just one use permanently alter their Serotonin levels in their brains. Years from now they will be jumping off of tall buildings due to their depression which resulted from the chemical alterations this drug did to their brains. Since Xers feel the need to push the limits on everything, they've also made an animal tranquilizer (Special K), crystal meth, and even embalming fluid their chosen mood enhancers.

Jayson Blair
Not the only Xer journalist to be a fraud, but Blair worked for The New York Times and that sets him apart. Who cares whether race had anything to do with him getting and keeping his job [that's for another website to handle], it is his personal ethics - or glaring lack thereof - that makes him a quintessential Gen-Xer. And, of course, he's turned his misfortune of being discovered making up stories into a marketing opportunity for himself as he tries to get his TV-movie-of-the-week about his actions and life made (shades of Monica Lewinsky anyone?).

Adam Sandler
I happened to see a story on television about Sandler's regional success before he broke into the big-time and was astonished that his 8-year-old antics amused anyone, let alone built him a cult following to serve as his fan base. As his stand-up and film output attest, he goes for the vulgar nearly every time - another Gen-X trademark. He is so self-aware as an actor - and so thoroughly humored by himself, that it makes it pretty insufferable to watch him. His stint on Saturday Night Live saw him end up in the lower 40% of cast members in terms of talent over the lifetime of that show (which has lived on for 20 years too long).

Smoking
The percentage of young people smoking had been falling for quite some time before Gen-X made it trendy again, and bought into obvious and simplistic marketing campaigns like the Joe Camal character. In Gen-X movie after Gen-X movie, smoking is glorified and showcased. Part of the reason Gen-X took to smoking is that it gives one something to do. The burning ember does look cool, especially in the dark, but really it is because Gen-X has nothing to say and smoking can cover some of those awkward silences, and much like pot in the 70s - starting up a conversation about cigarettes can be an ice-breaker. Xers are less considerate, of course, than older smokers and will be the first to empty their car ashtray onto the parking lot rather than a trash can and flick that butt into someplace where it shouldn't be. Since posturing and posing is a full-time job for most Xers, the cigarette prop serves a useful role.

Tom Green
Another of the utterly talentless to create a whole career out of being obnoxious and vulgar. He does broad physical-comedy type sketches and plays the idiot most of the time - rather convincingly, I might add. One good thing did come out of Green's career, the talented Andy Dick's vicious caricature of him on Dick's own MTV show which was spot-on and truly funny.

SUVs
SUVs are for assholes, period. And, of course, Gen-X went whole-hog for these gas-guzzling, mega-polluting, road-hogging, symbols of American excess. Since Gen-X has no politics and no apparent interest in the world around them (other than what is trendy or what "cool" is being sold to them off-the-rack), they don't care a whit that massive numbers of SUVs they drive support terrorism by sending additional monies to oil-exporting countries which funnel some of that money to terrorist organizations, or that 25% of the greenhouse gases causing global warming come from the U.S. (which has only 5% of the world's people) and that the average SUV pumps out at least twice as much CO2 [that's carbon-dioxide, a gas, you Xer idiots] as a typical car. Further, an Xer is very likely to drive and/or park their SUV in such a way that it inconveniences other drivers since they are so cool in their mega-SUV they want to make sure you notice them (forcing it upon you rather than earning your notice) by double-parking them, leaving the door open, parking it in the handicapped space, etc etc. An interesting corollary is that SUVs illustrate how Black Gen-X is a total political washout - seemingly grasping little or nothing of the sacrifices and ethics of their Civil Rights era elders but instead favoring ostentatious and vulgar displays of wealth - making the Cadillac Escalade the Hip-Hop SUV of choice BLING-BLING-BLING-BLING-BLING-BLING-BLING ...