DAMN ALIEN REVIEWS
as relayed to Steve Sawicki

ALIEN COMMUNIQUE #042600A

Greenings Earthers! We wish you joyeous returns in your never ending holiday toilings as you take your Santas from their crosses and string up your bunnies to your trees. Surely we have never studied a more interesting species. At least as it refers to the many mandatory toil breaks you force on yourselves. Truly your rituals are a joy to behold and wonder at. What will you think of next? Perhaps the illumination of some birth vehicles of a dinosaur ancestor? Perhaps the tight wrapping with multi-colored degradable tree leavings of many community spires? Perhaps simply the joy to be had in the thrusting of black disks into metal edged, string enclosed apatures. Sawicki explains these things to us but we believe he lies. Surely you can not be so ridiculous as to believe a being with trans-human powers has control over your environment and that you worship such a being in hopes of gaining trade units for lost bone fragments. We find your true reality in the words that you so copiously produce. If you were a more advanced species you would use fewer of them but we are willing to make the sacrifice in order to be enlightened. Settle now and take advantage of our superior positioning in the cosmos. Set down your Frintos corn chips and Salsy dip. We are about to review.

The response to our archived states has been beyond even our comprehension and so we shall continue to see that our work exists for your constant edification. Grow a pseudopod, grab your mouse, shout SPOOZE! and click here.

order Infinity Beach

Infinity Beach, Jack McDevitt, Harper Prism hardcover, ISBN 0-06-105123-3, $25.00 ($37.95 Canada), 435 pgs.

We are ever intrigued by the way you people explain aliens. We are especially intrigued because we know so many of them. That is why we found ourselves drawn to this McDevitt fellow. Jack McDevitt doesn’t have the large following he should have and even we with our superior intellect can’t exactly explain why. McDevitt has written a handful of novels and a bunch of short stories, all in the hard science sub-genre of science fiction. This is probably the most difficult type of writing to do. Not only do you have to get the science right but you have to find a way to introduce the reader to the concepts all the while telling a story worth listening to. This is even more difficult since you know so little real science to begin with. Asimov did it with Foundation. Clarke did it with Rendezvous with Rama. Niven did it with Ringworld and he along with Pournelle did it again with Footfall. McDevitt just might do it the best of any of them. He is, at least, the only true successor in the field.

Writing hard science-science fiction is incredibly difficult. First, you have to get the science right, and that ain’t easy for you Earthers. Even if you invent it there must be an apparent logical connection between what is and what you say will be. Second, you have to have a big concept or a big idea. It's hard to write a novel around a small change or concept. Third and most important, the ideas involved in such writing have to be solid. The individuals you create as your characters need to be even more so. McDevitt does this consistently and nowhere does he do it better than in this, his latest novel.

Infinity Beach grows from a rather simple supposition. The question McDevitt posits is: Are we alone? This is truly what science fiction is all about, taking a known truth and playing what if with it. Why the mere thought that the universe, which is teaming with species and cultures, might be empty nearly chokes one with disbelief. In McDevitt’s universe the search for extraterrestrial life has gone unanswered though. With the exception of nine worlds colonized by humans, the universe appears to be empty. It is a big emptiness. Not only are there no other intelligent species but there is no sign of other animal life right down to the lichen or amoebae. You are, truly and verily, alone.

This is no simple idea and McDevitt works out the ramifications right down to the psychological effect it would have on a population. It is this kind of follow-through which consistently marks McDevitt’s writing. Of course, once you create such a supposition it is only right to go ahead and prove yourself wrong, and do so in a way that is fantastic, mysterious and puzzling. Infinity Beach is built as much around a mystery as it is around the character of Dr. Kimberly Brandywine. Brandywine is involved in the search for Extraterrestrials, as was her clone sister Emily. Brandywine works on a project designed to make suns go supernova as a last ditch message to whatever intelligence might exist out there. It’s a massive beacon project and one of the last efforts in a long string of failures. Kimberly’s sister, Emily, was involved in one of those failures, a manned SETI expedition, cut short due to engine failure. Emily disappears mysteriously just after her return and just before a second member of the crew disappears. Another crew member is apparently killed in a massive anti-matter explosion, along with an entire village, while the fourth and last becomes a recluse. Brandywine begins to investigate and it is around this investigation that the novel is built.

The book is split into three parts. The first part involves the introduction of the concepts and the characters. McDevitt does this deftly, interweaving Brandywine’s development with the facts needed to understand the created universe. There are subtle choices made here and McDevitt could easily have gone the route of the scientific moderator. This is where the book stops while a scientist rises to give the readers the information they need to continue. This device was used exclusively in the early years of science fiction and it is an easy way out which many writers still use today, albeit a bit more skillfully. McDevitt, however, does not go this route and instead finds ways which are more natural and more conducive to entertaining reading. The middle, and largest portion of the novel, involves the unraveling of the mystery. Brandywine finds clues which lead her to more clues and to mysteries. Eventually she discovers that things are not what they seem, nor have they been for some time. The final part of the book involves rectifying the discovered situation. This is the classic format of beginning, middle and ending. McDevitt uses it to his advantage, building the story and weaving plot lines while introducing characters and situations which move the whole story along at a fairly quick pace. This is a big book and it reads extremely well.

Infinity Beach is, in our opinion, a great book and the best book that McDevitt has written to date. It will go a long way in establishing him as one of the few hard science fiction writers who can also tell a story.

Tenstacles up and flapping in affirmation.

order Lord of the Fire Lands

Lord of the Fire Lands, Dave Duncan, Avon Eos Hardcover, ISBN 0-380-97461-4, $23.00, ($32.00 Canada,) 352 pgs.

We thought Dave Duncan’s previous books were quite enthralling. Great plots, fantastic characters, intriguing story and excellent writing. As we finish each Duncan book we are sure that we will never see the likes again for surely he has dried up what little imagination you humans generally have. Perhaps though, Duncan makes up for the drips and drabs that most of you seem to be able to use by having a copious amount. We certainly hope so and we would do some alien probing if we weren’t afraid we’d simply muck things up. You Earthers take so poorly to probing. In any case, this is the second book of the series that Duncan is calling “The King’s Blades.” The first book in this series, The Gilded Chain, was excellent and we highly recommend it. We’d loan you our copy but it was mistakenly shipped to the homeplanet with the last batch of grapefruit.

Lord of the Fire Lands is a tale about two young men, one the exiled son of the ruler of a far land and the other an orphan, made so by the people of the first. The book is both a personal oddysey, about how these two young men must come to grips not only with their histories but with the situations that fate seems destined to place them in. Being a superior species we know that fate has nothing to do with it and that Duncan is behind every scrape and tight fit that these two find themselves in. Anyone, however can create a tight spot, it takes brains and good writing to figure out not just the obvious way but the human way. And we can tell you that you Earthers have more ways than means. This book is a journey tale, a coming of age epic and the expansion of the world that Duncan first created in The Gilded Chain. The book adds depth and breadth to an already intriguing idea and place. Not only this but Duncan is a master at character. He peoples his creations with individuals that you’d like to have around yourself. These are interesting folks while at the same time not all that different from you or us. Well, quite a bit different from us but you know what we mean. One of the most interesting aspects of Duncan’s writing is his ability to create secondary and tertiary, nay we might even mention quartiary, characters who are at least as interesting as the protagonists. It is so with this book as well.

Taking everything we have said into consideration, it is our utmost pleasure to tell you that if you are looking for a first rate, unusual, incredibly well written fantasy with engaging characters, a well paced and tightly plotted story, rich details, unusual situations and a creativeness that just won’t quit then this is the book for you. This is not only a fun read but a book that we had trouble putting down. We can hardly wait for the next one. If you’d like more info on Duncan or the books take a visit to his website at www.cadvision.com/daveduncan/

Multi-tenstacles upraised in ululation. (And we don’t fool around when we ululate!)

order Intersections

Intersections: The Sycamore Hill Anthology, John Kessel, Mark L. Van Name, Ruchard Butner eds., Tor Trade Paperback, ISBN 0-312-86384-5, $16.95, ($23.95 Canada) 449 pgs.

This is an anthology with an extremely interesting twist. In 1994 a number of science fiction writers (oddly enough, those contained in this anthology), got together for the Sycamore Hill workshop which took place July 31 to August 8 in a dormitory on the campus of the North Carolina State University in Raleigh. These forms of workshops, and we include the one that is done at Milford and which since bears that name, are little more than a collection of writers who gather to tear each others work apart. This is either an attempt on their part to harden their skins for eventual reviews; to beat said reviewers to the punch; or to use the experience as a means to better their writing abilities. Typically what happens is that each writer submits a story which everyone else in attendance reads. The writers then gather and begin to critique. The critiquing continues, one at a time and following set patterns of rules, until all have spoken. The critiqued writer can then either run crying from the room, defend themselves or finally realize just how talentless they really are. We have to tell you though, after dissecting quite a few (and boy was that L. Ron guy a real piece of plumbing) SF writers that they are not made the same way your average mountain bred trailercamping hillbilly is. These writers are made of different stuff so that these workshop experiences generally tend to harden their resolve to write.

We could go on and on about each story here but the true point of this whole exercise is not only the stories but the process. The book contains work from 14 different writers including Richard Butner, Carol Emshwiller, Karen Joy Fowler, Robert Frazier, Gregory Frost, Alexander Jablokov, James Patrick Kelly, John Kessel, Nancy Kress, Jonathan Latham, Maureen F. McHugh, Michaela Roessner, Bruce Sterling and Mark L. Van Name. Each work is followed by critiquers remarks taken directly from the workshop. They are more snippets than critiques but they still give you some insight into not only the process but into how mind’s work. Read each piece first and then the remarks to see if you agree or not. Finally each piece is followed by an afterward from the writer talking about the story and the critiquing session and what happened next.

All in all this is pretty interesting stuff. We recommend it. Not only because there are more than a half dozen real gems of stories here, but because the process itself is also incredibly interesting. We liked it and we recommend it.

Tenstacles and eyepods up.

order The Dragon's Eye

The Dragon’s Eye, Joel Champetier, Tor hardcover, ISBN 0-312-86882-0, $23.95 ($34.95 Canada) 297.

This is written by an alien we discovered, a Canadien to be exact. We have not before run into this species and therefore have only the few references of your own backwards culture to go by. But, hey, you make due with what you have, eh?

Dragon’s Eye is one of those books which posits that the future is Asian in nature, or at least that the Asian culture will so infuse the world that it will appear to be Asian. Thus it is that we find ourselves on a small planet colonized by the Chinese. The problem is that they’ve picked a tough planet to colonize. The planet has a double sun and one of the sun’s is not only blinding but carcinogenic. This is the Dragon’s Eye of the title. It forces the population, when it is in the sky, to take extreme measures, like wearing hats. This sad colony is not only somewhat ill placed but deep in debt to Earth. The colonists are split about whether to pay the debt back or just default. Into this mix comes our hero, a spy disguised as a courier whose job it is to smuggle out a second spy, or at least the brain of that spy so that Earth can figure out what to do.

Okay, okay, we agree that interstellar politics is not you Earther’s high point. Frankly, we’d just cream the planet if they did not pay us. But no, you Earther’s need to develop convoluted and extreme formulas of action so you don’t hurt anyone’s feelings. Of course, in the process, you bungle it all anyways and everyone gets hurt. It makes for amusing reading in any case. But enough of your American Presidency. We were talking about this book.

Champetier writes pretty good for a Canadien alien. The story flows with just enough speed to keep you cruising through the expository rough spots. It’s entertaining and enjoyable and the characters are weird enough to be amusing and interesting. We liked it much. It was both weird and refreshing.

Tenstacles pushed towards the Dragon’s Eye in the sky.

BIG IMPRESSIONS!!!

order Crescent City Rhapsody

Crescent City Rhapsody, Kathleen Ann Goonan, Avon Hardcover, ISBN 0-380-97711-7, $24.00 ($36.50 Canada), 430 pgs.

It is always so sad when a book breaks a promise. We picked up this book because of the pretty blue cover. We though it might have squid in it, what with it being set in New Orleans and all. It did not. But it was intriguing. We found intriguing characters and an interesting plot and a very interesting story. At least until about page 140. Then we discovered that we were being danced around in circles, that the characters did not seem to be doing anything but having pretty much the same discussions over and over and mostly with themselves. We discovered that the plot which we thought interesting seemed to just fade into the background of character self-interest. And still there were no squid. We read further even though half of our tenstacles throbbed for a clang shot. Another fifty pages we suffered until we were almost halfway to the end and still we saw no satisfaction on the horizon. This is where the remaining tenstacles joined in and the book was launched across the mother ship, deflecting off the shields and phasing off the weapons console until it finally landed squarely in the disintigrator chute. A moment later and the source of our agony was nothing more than component atoms. We could only hope that they would recombine into something more interesting.

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