The dancing cats are on strike they're not feeling loved anymore. If you want to see the dancing
cats anymore shoot a large beam of purple light in the night sky to summon them back.
Gee whiz, Dr. Beau! I left some orange juice in my room for a month
and it grew a layer of thick gray mold. Can I sell the mold as
penicillin?
You're quite the lucky guy. That stuff on top is the secret ingredient to a potent brew that can
make people melt on the toilet bowl.
Dr. Booze,
There seems to be a spork growing from my knee, its tearing my jeans!!
Please help!!
-Sporky in Seatle
I have seen this type of problem before. Normally with a spoon or fork
but I guess you have a cross between the two genes. If this is really a
problem I would suggest getting a saw and sawing your leg off. Then get
some money and buy a prosthetic. If you have any complications just
contact me again. Oh and by the way if you ever mispell my name again I
will rip out your intestines and feed them to squirrels.
-Dr. Beau
I think I put my shirt on backwards, could you give me a hand my dog was no help!
It's obvious to me that you are a complete freaking idiot. Please do the world a favor and shoot yourself in the face.
What is a choad?
A choad is a breed of monkey that has green skin pigmentation. In the words of the great Don Knotts, "When the green monkey bleeds the sky will fall."
If you have any questions for Dr. Beau, he can now be
reached at his new office (a pretty large box we found on the
street one day) at dr_beau@hotmail.com.
