In the deserts of Egypt. Jasonnicus, Scribe, First Mate, and Bunchovnauts enter.

First Mate: Pray tell us, mighty Jasonnicus, why have we left the cool embrace of the sea and the gentle rocking of our mighty ship, the Bunchov, to trek in this accursed land?

Bunchovnauts: Gosh it's hot!

Jasonnicus: We seek here the answers to our quest to find the Golden Sheepskin! It is clear to me now that no great feat, even one as glorious as the taking of Troy, will allow me to break Zeus's hideous curse!

First Mate: But I do believe that thou didst have the chance to break they curse of chastity with none other than Helen herself!

Bunchovnauts: We're thirsty!

Jasonnicus: Thou saw not her vile countenance! If ever she possessed beauty, it took flight of her long ago! I could not dream of forcing her upon my mighty schlong! Alas! That is the nature of Zeus's curse! Those who are willing I cannot bear to touch, even if given the gift of a paper bag! Those I can stomach shall not speak to me!

Bunchovnauts: Are we there yet?

Jasonnicus: Learned Scribe, are we there yet?

Scribe: Behold ye, the pile of bones of those that have come before at the foot of that monstrous statue? We have nearly arrived.

Jasonnicus: Bones and a statue? But thou had assured me that this place was of limited danger.

Scribe: Uh, yes...the existence of the bones is purely coincidental.

Jasonnicus: Come loyal followers! Our destiny is upon us!

Bunchovnauts: Alas! We have fallen and twisted our ankles! We cannot go on. We shall await your return, mighty Jasonnicus!

First Mate: I must tend to the crew Jasonnicus, so that thou needst distract thyself from thy quest!

Jasonnicus: Cowards. Come, Scribe, surely thou wilst accompany me.

Scribe: Uh, well...

Jasonnicus: Et tu, Scribe? So be it. Remind me again, though, how difficult is the question I shall be asked?

Scribe: Very simple, my lord. It will surely be something like "What is your favorite color," or "What is two plus two."

Jasonnicus: Very well then. I am off to solve the riddle of the Sphinx!

Scribe, First Mate, and Bunchovnauts exit.

Jasonnicus: I call on thee, Sphinx! I seek your knowledge in exchange for answering your silly riddle.

Sphinx enters.

Sphinx: Who is it dares to face me? Ah, it is thee, Jasonnicus, He with the Mighty Schlong! Here to find out where the Golden Sheepskin is, are you?

Jasonnicus: Well, duh. I don't fear your petty riddle. Out with it.

Sphinx: So eager are you to die, Jasonnicus? I suppose that I would anticipate the cold embrace of death if I were blessed with a divine organ that I could not use because of a jealous god. None have thus far been able to--

Jasonnicus: Yeah, blah blah blah. Are you going to ask the riddle or are you going to kill me through boredom?

Sphinx: Thou canst tell Hades that I did not warn thee! My riddle is thus: What has four legs in the morning, two at noon, and three in the evening?

Jasonnicus: That's easy! The answer is me, Jasonnicus the Heroic!

Sphinx: What?

Jasonnicus: In the morning I'm really tired, so I crawl around for awhile. By noon, the hangover hast worn off, and I'm feeling fine. By evening, tiredness again takes me, and I must use my schlong to help support me!

Sphinx: That's not the answer!

Jasonnicus: I thought you knew everything! Surely if you did, you would know that my answer rings true! Perhaps you are not the correct source for knowledge about the Golden Sheepskin.

Sphinx: Thou art cunning, Jasonnicus! I shall therefore impart upon the the knowledge that you seek. The Golden Sheepskin is located on the island of Bobbit. Beware, though, for the ruler of the island is a cruel queen named Lorena who leads an army of Amazons who will strike off the schlongs of any man who steps foot on the island.

Jasonnicus: Well that figures.

Sphinx: Leave me now, Jasonnicus! For I must think of a new riddle.

The Sphinx exits. Scribe, First Mate, and Bunchovnauts enter.

First Mate: Jasonnicus! You yet live!

Jasonnicus: No thanks to you dickheads. I now have the answer to the riddle! We must go to a feared and terrible island, and that is where our prize lies!

First Mate: Surely, it is not the terrible island of Bobbit!

Bunchovnauts: We would die a thousand deaths before going there! It is said that the women there feast upon the wieners of men, even we Greeks who shudder at the thought of having their schlongs touched by women!

Jasonnicus: Uh, no, of course not. We must hurry to the ship! Bunchovnauts, I see that your ankles are better.

Bunchovnauts: T'was but a cramp my lord!

Bunchovnauts and First Mate exit.

Scribe: Was the riddle difficult, Mighty Jasonnicus?

Jasonnicus: I don't know what the fuss was about. It was easier than you said.

Scribe and Jasonnicus exit.