February 25, 24 J.E.
Damn I've been busy, and I have so much to write about! On Monday I had another defining moment in my life. In a local bar they were having women's oil wrestling. I was initially not intending to go because 1) It would probably be ludicrously expensive, 2) the last time I went to a nudy bar I did not enjoy myself at all, and 3) it's not the kind of place to go to pick up chicks.
Then a friend of mine talked me into it and I went. DAMN that was cool. Now I'm the furthest thing from a chauvinist pig, but that really, REALLY kicked ass. It wasn't full nudity, 'cause that's the law in PA, but the women were VERY attractive and stacked like brick shithouses.
They offered a wide variety of ways to take our money. First they charged us $8 to get in. Before each "bout", the women would make their rounds through the crowd, performing various "services" for a buck. Then we got to bid on the opportunity to oil them up. Prices for this shot up to an average of $50 pretty easy. They also sold raffle tickets for the opporunity to wrestle the women in the ring. We also got to have our pictures taken with all four women for $5. And THEN we got to bid on a "fantasy bout" which was basically a guy wrestling the women again. After the entrance fee, I spent $3, and two of those were on a beer.
I suppose that the biggest thing about that night is that I learned that I CAN appreciate live porn as long as I can melt into the crowd. I don't want any special attention or any gropes or anything, even if they do only cost a dollar. I think that's what the problem was at that nudy bar. There weren't a whole lot of people there that night so you kind of got attention whether you wanted it or not. Ugh. That was not enjoyable. I guess I'm just one of those "porn at a distance" kind of guys. I don't feel like an exploitative son of a bitch if I'm just one of the many wide-eyed, slack-jawed faces in the crowd. Of course, even if I paid my bucks, I'd STILL be just another dude in the crowd, but I wouldn't FEEL like it.
Or something like that.
This brings up another point. I've noted a correlation between the ease in which you can get a chick and the risks you take. It seems to me that as chick who is distinctly easy offers much greater risks in terms of disease exposure, emotional damage, or psychotic boyfriends than a chick who is hard to get. Of course, the latter requires a lot more effort and may not be worth it to daring individuals. The risk curve goes up when the chick is EXTREMELY easy to get, though, reflecting the fact that they may have some hangups about sex or may generally be lunatics who tie you to the bed with a white scarf and stab you to death with an icepick. Maybe someday I'll make a cool graph and write an academic paper about it. Hey! That can be my thesis for my PhD in Pornology!
Well, back to work...