By now you've heard me rant and rave about chicks (a euphamism I use for human females), about how they hate me, about how they refuse to give me any lovin', gleefully give total jerks more than they can handle, and about how much I can't help but be enchanted by them. You might get the impression that I'm some sexist, myogynistic jerk based on some of the things I've said in jest or bitterness. I'm not, though. Both genders piss me off equally. Guys, however, lack the mitigating quality of boobs.
Overall, men interest me slightly less than a photographic documentary on the life cycle of the eggplant. Sure, I have male friends, and I relate to them well enough, but given the choice between talking to a chick or a guy, I'd take the chick, even if there's no chance of me ever scoring with her. Maybe it's because I KNOW guys. I've been one most my life, I have a brother, and most of my early friends have been dudes.
Of course, guys have their advantages. You can hang out with a guy friend or even sleep over (on the couch) and no one spreads rumors or suspects evildoings. They like sports, cool music, and, more importantly, chicks. There's nothing more fun than getting a couple of guy friends together and watching as the chicks go by. Actually, there are a LOT of things more fun than that, but it's still pretty cool. Finally, under normal circumstances, there aboslutely no sexual tension. Between men and women, there's always a LITTLE bit of that, even if they hate each other.
Guys also piss me off more than women usually, do, too. I think that their worst crime is cruelty to chicks. If they want to kill each other, I don't care (as long as it's not me or anybody I know). Sexual predation REALLY annoys me since, from even a purely practical point of view, it will mess a chick up and take her off the market, perhaps permanently. Even the low-key tradtitional kind, where men are expected to do all the work during courtship, screws up my life. I rarely hit on chicks, 'cause I figure that they're being hit on all of the time so why join the club?
All in all, a lot of guys are jerks, but so are a lot of chicks. Still, there're more diversity in chicks. Hair styles, fashion choices, and body shapes all contribute to make chicks more diverse. Guys have pretty much been pigeonholed into a few styles that makes them all look alike. There are only a handful of weirdos who dare to thwart the fashion police a resist this rigid soldiering (like me). So odds are, if you're a guy and unless you've got some really distinctive feature like two heads, your face will be filed in the "Trash" bin in my brain.
If you're a chick, then I love you.