The Millennium causes strange reactions among people, specifically, dimwits. Something about a whole bunch of zeroes makes people insane. Hell, compared to all of the fuss surrounding the year 1,000, this is extremely laid back.
I did research. People genuinely believed that the world was going to end. So, just like a bunch of squabbling kids who hear an authority figure returning to the room, everybody started being nice. The rich gave away their wealth, and...uh...other people did other nice things. Of course, on January 2, 1000, it was pretty much back to business as usual.
So this is nothing, even if you include the Y2K scare. Interesingly, most of the hype seems to have been LAST year when Y2K was big and there were all of those "The official [insert product name here] of the new millennium" things.
There were quite a few things like that, but the only one I can remember offhand is M&M's. They're still the only product to beat that "Official Candy of the New Millennium" thing, but only on the wrapper. They don't even have it in their commercials anymore, and it's only three months until the big date (Actually, due to old-time people not understanding math, it's a YEAR and three months until the new millennium, but who's counting?). I can't believe the hype of the year 2000 has burned itself out months before it actually happens.
To get to my point, who the hell decides if something is the "Official" what-not of the new millennium? Do they have a board of people somwhere who decide this stuff? Whom do I write to? At which government department do I send my application? Whom do I pay off?
After all, I have a number of ideas that haven't been taken yet. Maybe I can have my brain declared the paragon of brains for the next 1,000 years. Perhaps my sense of humor can become the standard. I think I like having the official webpage. Then I might get some hits.
Still though, my flagship idea is having my mighty weiner declared the Official Penis of the New Millennium.
Then maybe I'd get to use it at least once in the next 1,000 years.
