Chicks. Who can fathom them?
No, I'm not bitching about my inability to convince them why they should associate with me rather than those brain-dead abusive idiots to whom they seem to flock with depressing regularity.
Nope, today my issue with the feminine psychology is their attitude toward guns. For some reason, we as a culture have deluded ourselves into believing that men are the evil, violent gender while chicks are the soft, sweet, and, implicitly, perpetually victimized gender. Sad but true, most chicks are taught from day one to be a quivering bag of solid wussiness.
I recall a controversial study by a couple of losers that claimed, in short, that rape was a part of human nature and a necessary for the perpetuation of the species. Of course, that created an uproar, mostly based on emotion. I shall debunk it based on logic. First, rapes rarely result in conception, so it would hardly be an effective way to spread your genes. Second, the study assumes that stone age chicks would say, "Oh please, Mister Cave Man, please leave me alone." I'm thinking a primeval chick would tear off his nuts and feed them to him.
I now recall the anecdote of a woman who was assaulted in her home. Instead of wussing out, she grabbed the guy's schlong in one hand and his nads in the other and twisted. In no time at all the guy was on his knees begging for mercy. If only ALL chicks were like that, sexual assault would be nothing but a bad memory! Furthermore, according to the FBI, 50% of attempted assaults are aborted if the victim fights back, while only 2% of attackers give up if the chick does nothing more than beg. Yet, I've heard "feminist" leaders telling chicks to NOT fight! Egad! What's going on here? "But wait a minute," some dork in the back says, "men are still stronger than women!"
Which leads us to guns. These days, the anti-gun lobby is run largely on appeals to emotion, about the safety of children especially. Now I don't know what the actual breakdown by gender is, but I suspect that the ranks are filled by women and by men who know that if they don't fall into line they'll never score again (whereas I KNOW I'll never score again, and hence am immune to such strongarm tactics). They do what they can to appeal to our emotion as opposed to our intellects. With the Million Mom March coming up, they're trying to use the half-dozen annual accidental deaths of children playing with guns to try to force gun control (read elimination). The recent and highly-publicized shootings at Columbine and other schools have added more fuel to the fire, even though deaths at school are half of what they were ten years ago. Yep, women are largely spearheading the drive to take guns out of the hands of private citizens, largely under the delusion that it will eliminate violence. Instead of pushing for stricter enforcement of current gun laws or safety courses for gun owners, they do what comes naturally to activists: bitch a lot without proposing any practical changes.
The irony of all this is that, from a purely rational point of view, chicks should LOVE guns. Yes, men are usually bigger and stronger, but you don't need muscles, brains, or a penis to pull a trigger. GUNS ARE THE GREATEST EQUALIZER ANYBODY COULD HOPE FOR. I like to use this scenario: Let's say that, hypothetically, it was made law that anyone carrying a concealed weapon had to wear a big bright red armband, so every knew they were packing. Gee whiz, who do you think criminals are going to go after? The 5-foot tall 90-pound woman with the crimson armband? I don't THINK so. And if a few color-blind psychos get blown into the Devil's waiting room, so much the better.
It all comes down to this: Private ownership of guns is, if nothing else, the last line of defense against tyranny. No, I'm not some right-wing paranoid weirdo who thinks that Clinton is on the payroll of the International Communist Conspiracy. Heck, if everyone in the government were hell-bent on making the US a police state, it would take them DECADES to pull it off. Nevertheless, sooner or later, as history teaches us, a real dickhead will get into power, and he'll be pretty damn happy if the citizenry is completely unarmed and helpless. More practically, it means no individual can be tyrannical against YOU personally. I suppose it's a good thing that our society has become less tolerant to violence than ever before in history, but I wish people would start thinking with their heads a little more.
I need to go back in time and get myself a cavechick.
