EARLY ADMISSION FORM TO THE IMPERIAL HAREM

Version 1.0

In the interest of my imminent ascension to the head of the North American Economic Bloc and from there, unofficial global control, my advisors have told me that it would probably be better to remain unshackled by marriage so that I can keep a clear head. In order to satisfy my manly needs, however, they have devised a plan to create an official position of Imperial Concubine. This will be an office of great prestige limited to only 10,000 women of my choice. Because of the relatively small number of women who will be allowed entrance into the Harem, it is vital that you apply as soon as possible.

Please be truthful in all of your answers, since no single answer will disqualify you, unless you answer "no" to the first question. In that case, please fuck off at your earliest convenience.

1. Are you Female?

If you answer anything other than an unambiguous affirmative, GO AWAY.

2. Bra size:

3. NAME (or at least what you want to hear in the throes of passion) :

4. Age:

5. Height: Feet Inches

6. Weight (BE HONEST!): (lbs)

7a. How many previous sexual partners have you had?

0
1-5
6-15
16-30
31-50
51+

7b. How many per gender? Men: Women:

8. Do you have any of the following STD's?

None
Gonorrhea
Syphilis
Herpes
Genital Warts
HIV/AIDS
Unknown/Variety Pack
9. How many of the following sexual perversions/abnormalities do you have?

None
Sado-Masochism
Bondage/Domination
Belonephilia
Necrophilia
Zoophilia
Pediphilia
Exhibitionism/Voyeurism
Frigidity
Nymphomania
Multiple/Other
10. What is your profession?

College Student
Model
Mainstream Actress
Adult Movie Star
Prostitute
Call Girl
Escort
Exotic Dancer
Groupie
Phone Sex Operator
Dilettante
Other

11. Please list some of your favorite sexual activities:


12. What did you like about previous partners?

13. How would you improve them?


14. How often do you have sex?

Every Day
Several times a week
Several times a month
Once a month or less

15. What is your current geographic location?

16. In the space below, please tell us why you are a good choice to be a member of the Imperial Harem.

17. E-mail address:

Your application may be helped by the inclusion of a photograph, preferably completely or nearly nude. Forward electronic copies to BigChees@Imperial.com or through regular mail, send it to Bureau for Harem Selection, Office 69, Block 665, Imperial Palace, 38256-3669

TERMS AND CONDITIONS

All applicants must be over 18 or have implied parental consent. Applicants under 18 may be allowed to reserve a place in the harem, but may not enter formally until their 18th birthday. Unborn children may also be registered. Although we are under the impression that their parents are probably sickos, we appreciate the fanatic devotion to our benign ruler.

Due to the large number of members in the harem, the Emperor cannot be expected to to meet with his concubines regularly. However, we do guarantee that every memeber shall be allowed to see him at least once every five years. The order will be determined by random lottery. The trading of places and the selling of spots will be permitted between certified concubines only.

Those women who are not members of the harem but still wish to enrich their bloodlines with the Emperor's mighty genes may go to the various Imperial Impregnation Facilities across the nation.

I agree to all of the terms above and certify that everything I have written is true to the best of my knowledge. I hereby foresake most others and swear allegiance to the Emperor Jason the Heroic and to his Imperial Penis.
I do not agree to your terms or conditions, but I am hopelessly enamored anyway and hope that you will grace me with your radiant presence.

Please rest assured that the answers you have given will be viewed only by a select advisory committee of Harem Formation and the Emperor himself. Your confidentiality is guaranteed.

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