Today, like all days, I fight

With you, with me, with life

You have planted a seed

a spore

that spreads

contaminated body

no one will love me

no one will hold me

not I

I was so young

was
was
was

pure

innocent

and true


Beautiful

not I

sweet

no more

Where do you keep my smile?

In your pocket, close to your. . . self?

Has it been lost?

and devalued

When will you take the hate, the pain, the anger that is yours. . . 

I hold in my teeth

too tough to chew, too big and sour to swallow

You hold a picture in my mind

a little girl I forgot to save

a big brother I forget to kill, to hate

a picture worth a thousand tears

a picture called a memory

of many

Did grandpa teach you?

Did he know that?

He taught you well

so effeciant at killing me, you were

so persistant at stabing me

with your knife 

after you sucked me dry

so that I didn't bleed 

But I still got the wounds

and they can't heal until I do

with no one to tend to