5/31/00



ephedra's started hearing my thoughts. it's creepy. she hears them like i'm saying them aloud, only i'm not. no one else hears them. i'd rather she didn't. like a shark smelling blood. predatory. she can't hurt me, but i'll prefer it if she doesn't try.

i told her last night that i thought she was evil. she agreed with me. proceeded to justify it to herself by saying that she's only evil to evil people. why stoop?

sometimes i look in her eyes and there's nobody there. Other times she's the most real person i know. How do i reconcile it? This behavior is more befitting of a gemini than an aries.

i miss hemlock. he makes me happy. ephedra asks, "don't i make you happy?" i just look at her. "i make you afraid, don't i." yes you do.

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