The Woman In The New Age

By The Pathwork Guide

Greetings, my very beloved, dearest friends. Blessings for every one of you. I have promised to give a lecture about the woman in the New Age. I will do so with joy and with great pleasure. I shall speak of the evolution of consciousness as it relates to woman, and to the man-woman relationship. One cannot discuss this topic without seeing the evolving relationship between the sexes.

As the planet is maturing, so are men and women. What does this aspect of maturity really mean? Where have woman and man come from in the evolutionary movement, and where are they going? Woman is coming into her own in this phase of history: she is coming out of her confinement.

At the dawn of mankind, mankind was in a very primitive state of development. Distrust was rampant. Distrust of everything and anything other than the self. Distrust of the phenomena of nature, distrust of animals, distrust of the weather, distrust of the gods, distrust of fate, distrust of other tribes. In other words, distrust of anything that was different, strange, foreign, or that seemed that way. Therefore, distrust of the opposite sex was also very strong. Man innately distrusted woman and woman innately distrusted man. Each seemed justified in his or her distrust by dint of the other's distrustful attitude. Since the man was physically the stronger and since physicality was the sole expression of mankind at its dawn, he also assumed a general aura of superiority over all those who were weaker.

The mutual distrust and the man's physical domination were overtly acted out in those early periods of humanity. Since then the same traits and attitudes remain imbedded in the consciousness of woman and man, though to a lesser degree. They may be overshadowed by more realistic and mature awareness; they may not be acted out in the same way, but there remains a hidden corner in the psychic substance that needs to be brought out and changed in the course of the total development of all human beings. When you look back in history, then you can see that the planet did what so many individuals do: retaining an attitude long after it is meaningful, or purposeful, or adequate to the general development of the entity. So man retained a position of superiority long after physical prowess ceased to be considered the prime value. As development progressed, other values had come into existence, values that apply equally to both sexes. Yet men -- and often women as well -- persisted in considering man the superior and woman the inferior. In order to justify this assumption and to make it a fact, woman was supposed to be intellectually and morally weaker.

To the degree that the man did not first meet and then deal with his own feeling of inferiority and his own feeling of weakness -- in other words, to the degree that he wished to pretend he did not have those feelings -- to that degree he assumed a position of arrogance and of superiority over all those who were weaker in physical strength. He needed slaves in order to convince himself of his own value. This applied to animals, it applied to the people whom he conquered and subjugated through warfare, and it also applied to women. Later, woman chose to assume a mental and emotional position of dependency, and thus actively chose enslavement, no matter how much she tried to put the blame exclusively on the man.

By the same token, the man expressed and evinced fear toward those who were physically stronger than he. And the more fear existed toward those who were stronger, the greater the urge became to subjugate weaker people. This is a human trait in the unenlightened person that you know well from your inner processes. It is a compensatory phenomenon. This attitude still exists in the consciousness of mankind. It is not something that woman is free of, for when you look deeply into your consciousness, then you will find similar attitudes embedded in yourself. There is also a part in the woman that contributed to the situation in the age that has just passed. Why has woman been subjugated and denied her birthright of self-expression, of mental equality, of emotional equality, and of spiritual equality with the man so long after physical prowess had ceased to be an individual's main value? The woman could not simply be a victim of man's egotistical desire to feel superior and stronger, to possess the woman as an object. The woman also plays a role here.

You women who are on this path no longer find it so difficult to ascertain an attitude in you where you do not want to assume self-responsibility. In other words, where you want to be taken care of by a stronger authority figure. A similar attitude exist in the man. However, in the old interrelationship between man and woman, the woman victimized herself by acting out on the level of outer behavior a denial of self-responsibility: she acted out giving in to the line of least resistance so as to be taken care of. She wanted an authority figure to make decisions for her, to take the consequences of her mistakes, to take the blame, to take the responsibility, and to battle with the hardships of life. She wanted to indulge in the pseudo comfort of a subjugated state.

It has turned out to be a disappointing, unfulfilling way of life, as all misconceptions must lead to that sooner or later. But the woman has abstained from taking her share of the responsibility for this state of affairs. Now she puts all the blame on the man.

The new woman's movement contains a great deal of truth. But it is, as in all dualistic approaches, but a half-truth. The truth is that the woman possesses the same faculties of intelligence, of resourcefulness, of creativity, of psychic strength, and of productive self-expression in life as the man. To claim that she does not makes no sense at all and has become a game on the part of the man, who does not want to face his own feelings of weakness and of inferiority, and who therefore needs to feel superior to the woman.

By the same token, in order to make the new women's movement truly meaningful, the woman must ascertain within herself the part that has invited her enslavement. I would venture to say that the stronger the outer rebellion and the blaming of the opposite sex, then the stronger must be the desire not to govern her own life that exists within the soul of that individual woman. In other words, the desire not to be responsible and not to accept the consequences of her actions and the consequences for her decisions, and therefore the neeed to lean on someone else. To the degree that she makes unfair and unrealizable demands on others, to that degree she must resent and blame male authority, and then play a game of victimization.

On the other hand, to the degree the man does not face his fears, his guilts, and his weaknesses, to that degree he will play a power game in one form or another and then resent the woman for supposedly exploiting him and for putting too much of a burden on him. In the immature soul both men and women want the advantage without paying the price. The man wants the superior position, but he resents the price of taking care of a parasite. The woman wants the advantage of being taken care of -- of not wanting to stand on her own two feet -- but she resents having to pay the price of losing her autonomy. Both play the same game, but they both hesitate to see their mutual creation in this distortion.

On a still deeper level of the consciousness of man and woman the opposite of the manifest behavior also exists. The man also carries an aspect where he shrinks away from the responsibility of adulthood and then he envies the woman her position that was sanctioned socially for her for so long. He overcompensated for this by putting too much emphasis on the power game. The woman hides a part in her where she, too, wants aggression, power, strength -- not only in the real sense, but also in the distorted sense. She envies the man for it. In former times this side of her had to be totally submerged. It was not sanctioned socially, just as the man's counterpart was rejected. Only recently does this part emerge, but often it is still confused with genuine selfhood. Both men and women must find their way out of this confusion. How can the man be an equal to the woman without being weak? How can the woman have her emotional fulfillment and still be an autonomous adult? These are not real opposites, but results of the dualistic confusion.

When movements, orientations, and philosophies do not deal with the whole picture but with only half of the picture, then it is impossible to set the balance right. It will become the opposite imbalance from the one that existed previously. Although in the course of evolution the pendulum must swing to some degree from one extreme and from one exaggeration into its exact opposite, deeper and wiser insight into the unitive truth can help to avoid excesses in this respect.

You know the principles that I have discussed again and again on this path. One is the principle of dualism versus the principle of the unitive cosciousness. In duality, the man will feel superior and believe the woman to be inferior. Consequently, he will exploit her, but he will also feel exploited by her. In such a relationship fulfillment is impossible. And the woman will feel that she is being unfairly put upon and exploited by the physically stronger man and she will blame him for victimizing her. Both will fail to see the other side, where they are indeed very similar and where they complement one another in a distorted way.

I have spoken before about some of the points I have to mention in this lecture. So once again I will have to repeat myself. I mentioned a long time ago that both the feminine principle and the masculine principle must be represented in the healthy individual. They may not be expressed in exactly the same way in the man and in the woman, for the differences make up the whole. But the differences are not of a qualitative kind. Hence, they must never lead to a comparative value judgment. In other words, that one is better or more developed than the other.

Let us have a glimpse of the woman in the New Age. Let me paint a picture and then let us see how this applies to the relationship between the sexes. The new woman is completely self-responsible, and therefore free. In other words, she stands on her own feet, not only materially but also intellectually, mentally, and emotionally. By that I mean specifically that she knows that no man can give her happiness and the pleasure of her flowing feelings unless she herself produces them through loving and through integrity; through opening her heart to loving and opening her mind to her own inner truth. The new woman knows that loving a man and surrendering to her feelings for the man enhances her strength as an individual. It does not diminish her strength. In the New Age woman there is no conflict between being a productive, creative, contributing member of society and being a loving mate. As a matter of fact, not only is there no conflict whatsoever, but real love is not possible toward someone to whom one plays the role of a slave in order to abdicate one's self-responsibility. The old fairy tale that a woman's career will make her less of a woman -- less feeling, less loving, less equipped to be a divine mate -- has never had any substance in reality.

This new state require a strength and an autonomy that need to be earned. They need to be earned by standing in life, by standing in reality, and by shouldering reality, with all that this means. But you have to do so not in a spirit of hate, of rebellion, of competition, of defiance, nor by imitating the worst excesses and distortion of manhood: the negative aggression and the power games. It has to be done through the power of truth and love. In other words, from the higher self. When something real is denied due to the misconception, to the false idea that it is too difficult, then those same difficulties must first be accepted before they prove themselves to be not so difficult after all. Self-responsibility seems too difficult, but really is not, once the apparent hardships are accepted because doing so really amounts to honesty in the approach to life.

Where distortions still exist, then in those areas the woman still wants from the man what she refuses to do for herself. In the New Age woman this will not be the case. This does not mean that two people who share their life together do not also share their difficulties. But this is not what I am talking about here. You know perfectly well from your path that what you secretly wanted from a superior father authority you shifted onto a mate. You also know how such an implicit desire is bound to destroy any relationship. It is bound to make you resent and fear the very authority you wish to exploit in this way. Love can only flower in a climate of true equality, where no fear exists, and therefore no defenses and no blame. Contrary to the fairy tale that femininity blossoms only when the woman is just a servant to the man, the truth is that feelings can actually blossom only when the woman is free, only when she is autonomous, only when she is independent in the best sense of the word. So fulfillment is completely dependent on a state of equality. The moment one feels superior to the other, then one's respect for the other is lowered, and thus the feelings close up. The moment one feels inferior to the other, then resentment, fear, and envy become inescapable. And that, too, closes off the heart.

The new woman is neither a slave to the man, nor is she in competition with him. Therefore she can love, and her love will never lessen her creative self-expression, but only enhance it, just as her creative contribution to life can only enhance her love capacity. That is the new woman.

The man in the New Age will no longer need a weaker mate in order not to feel his own weakness. The man in the New Age meets his weakness, he faces it, and thereby he gains his real strength. He realizes that his weakness is always guilt, and he knows that this self-rejection is always the result of a denial of the integrity of his higher self in one form or another. Therefore the need for a slave no longer exists. Then the man is not threatened by an equal. He does not require an inferior mate to convince himself of his acceptability. This is always an illusory acceptability. Since he faces his weakness, he must gain his strength. Therefore his relating to the woman is truly one of equality, where he is not threatened by someone who is just as creative, just as adequate, just as morally strong, and just as intelligent as himself. So he will not need to play the role of the master. This enables the man to open his heart and to experience a fulfillment that previously was impossible. Thus, whatever vicious circles existed will now turn into benign circles. Instead of the inferiority feelings closing the heart -- thereby creating resentment and hate and therefore creating frustration and therefore creating blame toward the other sex -- the benign circle will now open the heart. The fully autonomous, self-reliant, self-responsible, and self-actualizing man and woman have nothing to fear, nothing to envy, and nothing to resent in the other sex. Therefore they can open all the channels of their feelings and thus they can experience not only fulfillment, but also a sense of gratitude toward the mate. Two equals help each other in their growth as individuals, as man and as woman. This is the New Age man, the New Age woman, and the New Age relationship.

And where this does not yet exist, then it is important that you be able to point out the fallacies within you: the distorted expectations, the illusory aims, the negative feelings that are a result of false ideas or misconceptions; and also it is important that you are aware of the stake you have -- in other words, of your negative intentionality -- to maintain an inner warfare. Such a double awareness will give you an entirely different stand toward yourself and toward the other. So the New Age man and the New Age woman are not necessarily perfect and totally developed individuals. However, they are individuals who look for the pitfalls -- in other words, for the reasons for their lack of fulfillment -- just as much in themselves as in the other. Thus they can recognize a negative mutuality or a negative interaction, which can then be worked out together. In other words, they do not assume the stance of self-righteous blame -- only to widen the gap between the self and others, and therefore between the self and the truth. Autonomy is an ever-growing process which makes distrust disappear. The distrust that still exists between the sexes is a residue of the ancient times when anything that was foreign and different was feared, rejected, and an attempt was made to subdue it. In the New Age the differences will no longer induce fear. When the universe is trusted, then the difference always posseses a special attraction. When you do not fear the difference but are attracted by it, then you are fully actualizing yourself, you are dissolving your blocks of untruth, and you are realizing your highest potentials. But when that is not the case and you fear and distrust the difference and you deny that which is different, then you can use this as a gauge of how you wish to remain in untruth, and therefore in suffering.

In the present state of humanity's consciousness you find all these different stages of development on many levels. The highest form -- the ideal -- may already exist in your consciousness to some degree. In your conscious thinking you may truly embrace some of the ideas that I have expressed here. But then there are also those deeper levels where your emotional reactions do not agree at all with the ideas that you consciously embrace. It does no good to postulate the conscious ideals of these concepts without also seeing where and how you deviate from them. For that is the only way to safeguard against imbalance and against disharmony within -- and therefore also against creating it outside. The next lecture will deal with the topic of balance and harmony.

There is one key to everything that exists, and that is love. Without that key nothing could be mended, nothing could unify, no truth could ever be gained. And yet it is equally true to say that love cannot be gained without truth. In a deep corner in the heart of man and woman hate still prevals, fear still prevails, resentment still prevails, and distrust still prevails. But even more importantly, the will to maintain this state -- the negative intentionality to perpetuate it and hence to hide this fact -- prevents the flowering of the heart and of the mind of man and of woman. To the degree that this is so, to that degree you have not gained yourself, and therefore you are neither able to relate to the other nor able to fulfill yourself. To attempt such relating and such fulfillment while this attitude remains unchanged is sheer waste, it is utterly futile.

So find that corner in your heart -- that small hidden crevice -- where you hate the other sex. And also where you defend yourself against recognizing this by blaming, by accusing, by resenting, and by closing your heart and your feelings with apparent justification. The woman will use the game of victimization and the man will use the game of blame and of superiority. He will blame her for exploiting him and for using him, and he will feel superior to that part in the woman that makes her weak.

The pendulum has temporarily swung into the opposite extreme. The woman has become militant, thereby forgetting her heart and her love for the man, and rejecting the attitude of loving. In the counter-movement of the pendulum, the man has left his positive aggression behind. He had to temporarily go into overt weakness and he is now coming into a new strength. It is a strength that is able to face the existing weakness. Thereby he expands the real values and the real force in him. Therefore he does not need to be the superior member of the team. He can afford to let his heart speak and therefore relate to his partner from the heart, on the feeling level. Likewise, he can relate with his mind to the mind of his woman on a level of equality. That is the man of the New Age.

For this to happen you need to go into this deeper part of you where you do not want to forgive, where you do not want to understand in truth, and where you want to preserve your case and go on hating. You need to release your hatred toward the other sex. You have to pray for the ability to love, to pray for the ability to forgive, to pray for the ability to understand, and to pray for the ability to see that what you hate, what you fear, and what you distrust exists in exactly the same way in you -- though perhaps manifesting in a different way.

The woman is as just much a representation of the active principle as the man. And the man is just as much a representation of the receptive principle as the woman. In their coming together in sexual union this may not always express outwardly in the same way, but the inner forces must combine both the active principle and the receptive principle. Otherwise an imbalance exists. No man can be a true man unless he incorporates the receptive, or as it is also called, the feminine principle. If he expresses only the masculine principle, then he becomes the caricature of a man. Then he is a bully, a tyrant, an exaggeration, a falsehood. By the same token, a woman who only expresses the receptive principle or the feminine principle is a caricature of a woman. She is truly an infant who has to lean on others because she negates her own autonomy. So in order to be fully receptive on the feeling level she has to express the active principle every bit as much as the man.

The two principles must be represented in both sexes and they must complement one another, while at times they are also parallel. This perfect balance cannot be thought out through the mind or brought about through an intellectual decision. It can only be found organically through the inner act of love, the inner act of releasing the other sex from the bondage of hate, from the bondage of distrust, from the bondage of blame. When the wish for this release is pronounced in daily meditation -- and thus when God's grace can go to work within the consciousness of the woman as well as of the man -- then love will lead to truth and truth will lead to love. Then the two sexes will function as equally productive human beings in the new universe -- complementing one another, aiding one another, loving one another, respecting one another, creating a new world side by side, and thereby creating bliss for each other. This is the way.

(In answer to a question)

My friends, you may have noticed a pattern on this path in which it invariably happens that an individual must first resolve his career problems before partnership problems can be resolved. This will become clear in the context of this lecture. When relationships are formed out of dependency, out of parasitism, out of exploitation of the other, and out of the need to dominate and to enslave, then these individuals have to fend for themselves for a while until a certain minimal autonomy and independence has been established. Once this creative channel has been established, then a new freedom can release previously trapped energies. Then such people can begin to relate to the other sex in an entirely new way.

I was very happy to give you this lecture, for everything that leads toward the further unfoldment of the whole person -- both of the man and of the woman -- is a joyful experience for us in our world. See the beauty of the Christ Who goes through all of you. Be in peace. Be your God.

March, 1975