Star Wars!! By the time this chapter is posted, we have no doubt that some of you will have already seen the much anticipated, much-hyped, oft-maligned surefire blockbuster Star Wars, Episode 1: The Phantom Menace. In homage to this momentous event, we of course had to mention it at least once.
Many thanks to Miss Mary Katherine Heilman, for sending us the following funny:
YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK JEDI IF...
You've ever used the phrase "May the Force be with y'all."
Your Jedi robe is camouflage.
You have ever used a light saber to open a bottle of Bud Lite.
At least one wing of your X-Wing fighter is primer-colored.
You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.
You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.
The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.
Wookies are offended by your BO.
You have ever used the Force in conjunction with fishing or bowling.
Your father has ever said to you "Shoot, son, come on over to the Dark
Side...it'll be a hoot.
You have ever used your R-2 unit's electro-shocker to light the barbecue.
You ever fantasized about Princess Leia wearing Daisy Duke shorts.
Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hut had
a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.
You would outfit the Millennium Falcon with redwood deck.
You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.
You hear someone say, "Luke, I am your father---and your uncle...."
If you would like to read other funny Star Wars related stuff, including a drinking game and the top ten most sexually explicit lines from the films, click here.
For the purists, you can visit the "official" Lucas films website here.