OUTSIDE THE OPERA HOUSE

: Come on Edge, hurry up or we'll be late

: Rydia, I really don't want to go to the opera...

: Sure you do. Here we are

: Hello, tickets are 100GP each

: What??! I'll cut you up, man! I'll do it!!!!

: Eep! Please don't hurt me!

: Hehe, I'm just kidding; here's the money

: *sighs* Do you have to do that every time?

: Hehehe, let me have a little fun, would ya? *goes into the Opera House with Rydia*

: *walks up to the ticket booth with Celes*

: Two tickets please

: That'll be 200GP

: No proble- !! LOOK AT THAT!!! *points*

: Huh? *looks*

: *steals the usher's wallet*

: ...

: I don't see anything

: My mistake. *pays for the tickets*

: *mutters* Do you have to do that every time?

: Hehehe, I can't help myself *goes into the Opera House with Celes*

: *wanders by with Cloud*

: Congratulations! You are our one hundredth couple! You get free tickets!

: Thank you very much, come on Cloud

: Wha? Why does this happen every time?!

: Hehehe *drags Cloud into the Opera House*

INSIDE

: Hello everyone; and welcome to my Opera House. Today's special presentation is a tragic tail of love, war and tea. The opera is presented in the original language it was written in, Townsfolkese, but fear not, for those unaware of the subtleties of this language, I have provided translators

: Hello, I will be translating the words of Nina

: And I will explain what Karn is talking about

: The scene begins with Nina, our heroine, at home. She is waiting for her love, Karn, to return. Now, let the play commence!

: Would you like some tea?

: Oh, where is Karn? I am so very worried for him

: *enters* The war is not going well

: Yo

: Would you like some tea? *hugs Karn*

: Karn! I was so worried!

: The war is not going well

: Nina, I'm sorry. But it is my duty to protect our king, and our country

: Would you like some tea?

: Would you like some tea?

: The war is not going well

: Yes please

: Would you like some tea? *gives tea to Karn*

: Here you go

: The war is not going well *drinks the tea*

: Thank you

: Would you like some tea?

: Karn, I don't know if this relationship is working

: The war is not going well

: What are you saying?

: Would you like some tea?

: I need... time to grow, on my own...

: The war is not going well

: Nina...

: Would you like some tea?

: I love you, Karn... yet I cannot be with you

: The war is not going well

: Now I hate you... yet I need you

: Zzz...

: Poor Rydia, it must be pretty embarrassing to have your date fall asleep like that

: Zzz...

: Would you like some tea?

: I knew you would not give me up, even if your feelings changed

: The war is not going well

: You're darn right, we'll be together forever, happily or otherwise!

: Would you like some tea?

: So that's why I poisoned your tea

: The war is not going well

: Vile witch...!

: Would you like some tea?

: It is the only way, for both of us

: The war is not going well *falls over*

: Niiiinaaaaaa...!

: Would you like some tea?

: Alas

: The End

: That's just about the worst story I've ever heard

: It really loses a lot of impact in the translation