PDF fluff: 
If All The World's a Stage, I Want Better Lighting* 
copyright 2003 
by Anne Fraser 

A play in fifteen acts, without dialogue. 

Act one: 

The curtain opens to reveal a filthy Elizabethan brothel of the lowest possible sort, the kind
generally referred to as a "stew". Women beckon to men, displaying their charms. A
handsome, dark-haired boy of about twelve stands outside the stews, luring in passers-by with
the promises of forbidden pleasures to come. He is a very pretty boy, and some of the male
customers indicate that they would prefer his company to that of any woman. He takes one
inside with him, and they slowly ascend the stairs, the man's hand possessively touching the
boy's quite delectable backside. 

Act two: 

The boy wanders the busy, friendless streets. A man dressed in far better clothing than that of
most of the inhabitants of this section of town stops and stares at the boy. He goes and speaks
to the boy in low tones, hands gesticulating, body posture conveying sincerity and urgency. He
is a young man himself, with the sweet face of a poet that belies a life of dissipation. He is
Christopher Marlowe. He does not resemble Rupert Everett. He persuades the boy to come
with him, and they exit, hand in hand, the boy's expression one of doubt mingled with hope. 

Act three: 

The boy, now seventeen, enters stage right and takes a bow. There is applause. He is now a
player in a highly-regarded company and well on his way to reknown. His face lights up,
making him momentarily almost unearthly beautiful, when Marlowe enters stage left. Marlowe
touches the boy's face, kisses him, and bids him farewell. Other players wander through,
bidding the great playwright godspeed and good luck on his trip to Deptford. Marlowe exits,
stage right. Blackout. 

Act four: 

The lights slowly come back up. A rag-tag remnant of tired, dispirited players gather at a
cheap tavern. It is mostly deserted. Plague rages through the city. The companies that can
afford to have left for the country or been disbanded by the Puritans. What is left of the
Chamberlain's Men seek a rich patron. The boy, hero of the first three acts, is now a young
man of twenty-one or two--he has never really known his exact age or parentage. He offers to
be the one to approach the mysterious Lord Carrock, one of the few nobility left who might
offer patronage to an acting company. 

Act five: 

Lord Carrock's estate. High gates guard the property. A tiger roams the hallways, as does a
tall, beautiful, blade-sharp African/Middle Eastern woman who takes the boy to the Lord. The
boy explains his mission to the red-haired Carrock, who agrees. For a price. A bargain is
struck. 

Act six: 

The master bedroom of Carrock's manor house. A high, canopied bed, piled high with furs.
The boy lies in the middle of it, furs drawn over his naked body. He is awake, his remarkably
beautiful eyes staring at nothing. Carrock enters, carrying a small child in his arms. He offers
the child to the boy in the bed, who at first refuses and draws away. Carrock gestures angrily
and thrusts the child at the boy. The boy aquiesces and lowers his lips to the child's neck. The
strains of an Elizabethan lullaby are heard off-stage. A trick of the lighting turns the furs on
the bed to blood red. 

Act seven: 

The boy and the dusky-skinned woman lie together in a different bed. Their red-haired master
hears a noise without his doors and investigates, disdaining calling for his servants. He falls
with a crossbow bolt through his heart even as the woman warrior shoves her bedmate to the
floor and reaches for her own weapons. Their master's enemy and rival vampire, Ralston, is in
charge of the house. He throws them out to their fates. 

Act eight: 

The boy, now a vampire and masterless, roams the world. He is debauched, sleeping with any
who offer, male or female, seeking greater novelty, seeking pleasure from pain and
debasement. He briefly seeks a new master, an older vampire of evil repute, but this master
proves too debauched even for the boy's taste. The set remains stark and bare; the other actors
on the stage present the boy's wanderings through history. Much is a blur; centuries pass like
shifting scenery and suddenly we are in the 20th century. 

Act nine: 

The 1920s. Jazz and Prohibition. Speak easies and gangsters. Radio and vaudeville. The boy
deals cards behind a table. A red-haired man, but very different from Lord Carrock enters and
demands a light for his cigarette. Hand signals are made, recognized. The man waits outside
the club for the boy to leave. They exit stage right, hand in hand. The scene shifts to the man's
home, where he and the boy share a bed. It is obvious that there is more here than mere sex. 

Act ten: 

A well-appointed speak easy. A piano sits centre stage, under a muted spotlight. Patrons sit at
candle-lit tables, drinking bootleg liquor smuggled in from Canada. A woman sits on the
piano, shapely legs outlined by silk stockings, entertaining the crowds. As the spot focuses on
her face, it becomes obvious that she is none other than the boy from the previous acts. When
her act is finished, the patrons applaud her and the red-haired man kisses her hand. She exits
with him. 

Act eleven: 

A dock by a river. Night. Crates are piled high. There is the clink of bottle glass. The red-
haired man speaks to someone just off-stage. Three other men arrive, there is a confrontation,
shots are fired. The red-haired man is shot by a trim, dapper-looking man who does not seem
capable of such violence. The boy, still dressed as the female singer, arrives stage left and
drops to his knees beside the red-haired man. In his fury, he then strips off his disguise and
attacks the well-dressed killer. Blackout. 

Act twelve: 

A university lecture room. Three people sit in the front row, two men and a woman. One of
the men and the woman are both very good-looking; the other man is average. A young man
enters the room, and they exchange greetings. The young man is tall, hunky, limps a little, has
"ex football player" stamped on his forehead. The lecture room slowlys fills up with students.
There is a hush, and the boy, the same boy, enters. He no longer looks like a boy. He has aged
his appearance, added silver highlights to his hair to convey an illusion of wisdom. He speaks
to the assembly and has a close conversation with the husky young man. This young man, the
first three people, and the boy/vampire lecturer exit together. 

Act thirteen: 

An empty house. The five from the previous act walk through the deserted rooms, searching.
A sixth person, a well-dressed man, encounters them and remonstrates with the boy vampire.
A fight ensues, which the boy wins. The other vampire is defeated. The husky young man,
realizing he is surrounded by vampires, becomes afraid. The boy reassures him, but also drinks
his blood and seals the convenant with a kiss. 

Act fourteen: 

A blur of action. The three vampires from the lecture hall argue with the boy vampire, and
depart. The dusky warrior woman from acts fix, six and seven returns. There is a dangerous
blond female vampire who briefly menaces. A dark Italian woman is frequently seen. A witch.
Many other vampires, apparently some at strange parties and award ceremonies. At one point,
an annoyed ghost seizes the boy and spanks him soundly with a silver hairbrush. A
confrontation in Europe with the beautiful female vampire from the lecture hall ends in pain.
The husky young man, often with a confused expression on his face, is always in the
background. Classrooms, stages, students, more strange parties, friends and foes, a
confrontation with an old enemy that ends in a truce and perhaps even friendship. Then,
disaster. An old campus building, faulty lighting, a fire, death. Blackout. 

Act fifteen: 

The curtain rises on a bare stage. The boy vampire sits alone in a naked spot on a plain stool.
He is plainly dressed. He could be anything. He could be anyone. 

He is Adrian Talbot. 
____________ 

Dramatis personae: 

Adrian Talbot: 5'7", slim, built like a dancer, extremely pretty, can successfully masquerade as
a female in fact. He has dark wavy black hair and teal eyes and is extremely devastating. He's a
vampire. Also an actor, teacher, director, anthropologist and bootlegger. 


T'beth: tall, of mixed African and Middle Eastern (those darned nomadic tribes, I tell ya)
descent; exotic-looking with cafe au lait skin and chocolate coloured eyes and a murderous
backhand. A very deadly woman. She's a vampire. Also a bodyguard, hunter, private
investigator and problem solver. Admittedly, she usually uses a weapon to solve problems, but
they stay solved. 

Jake Fowler: 6'4", brown hair, brown eyes, ex football player. Graduate of Comparative
Anthropology from University of Toronto, currently employed as a computer geek/researcher
at a recruiting firm. Yes, he's an anthropologist working for headhunters. He's also a
bloodling. Reread act thirteen. That kiss? Adrian had blood on his lips. Jake ingested it. It's
been giving him lots of trouble ever since. 

Further reading: go to 
1. http://www.geocities.com/that_actor and work your way through the stories. All of them.
They're all good. 


*I saw this on a t-shirt once. So sue me.