Grammatical Boss
As a boss, he is very grammatical, he always ends his dictation with a proposition.

It Pays to Advertise
A car dealer was asked if advertising is effective. "Yes, it brings quick results. Once I ran an ad that my our watchdog was missing and offered a reward for his return and published our address."
"Did you get your dog back?"
"No, but that very night, 3 of our cars were stolen."

Bank Cashier
"I understand the bank is looking for a cashier."
"I thought they hired one last month."
"He's the one they're looking for right now."

Retirement
I know a fellow who's retiring after fifty years with a company and it's just great. When he started, he made $5.00 a week and all he could afford was a cold-water apartment room and onion sandwiches. But he worked and sweated and got promotions and gave everything he had to his job, and so now, after fifty years, in 1997, he's retiring with a $12,000 pension - and all he'll be able to afford is a cold-water apartment room and onion sandwiches.

Paint Job
Pope Julius II hired Michaelangelo to paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. Julius was a taskmaster. Michaelangelo worked day and night, on his back, hot wax and paint dropping on his face. In winter he worked in heavy gloves, in summer the heat drove him to exhaustion. Finally the frescoes were complete. Pope Julius came to see them. He stared long and hard, until Michaelangelo could stand no longer. "What do you think?"

"Not bad," the pope conceded. "But for the kind of money, I expected 2 coats."

Business Sense
During dry season, there was not enough hay to keep cows fed, so Gunister and friend decided to go into hay merchandising biz. They got a truck and drove to town where they bought hay for $10 a bale. Then they brought it home and sold it for $6. After few weeks in business Gunister said, "You know there must be something wrong. We're just not making any money."

"I know, maybe we ought to get a bigger truck."

Q & A
Q: What do you call a dinosaur as tall as a house, with long sharp teeth, and 12 claws on each foot?
A: Sir.

Proposition
A businesswoman is sitting at a bar. A man approaches her. "Hi, honey," he says. "Want a little company?"
"Why?" asks the woman. "Do you have one to sell?"