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(Continued from page 4)
Î
Well, here's the part where you'll think I'm insane. Irene Yoon probably thinks I am, after she
heard it over the phone. But I think something important happened. Here goes:
I'm playing a CTY tape that Irene sent me after she got home after double session this year.
I'm playing the last three songs; Forever Young, Stairway, and, of course, American Pie. It
begins with the 1st song.
First, I saw Jen, my first girlfriend's face distinctly. I haven't seen her face distinctly since JHU
last year. But there wasn't any ambiguity; she was standing in front of me, I think during a
dance in ATS at Car. I had my back to the projector, standing in front of the chairs, facing the
stage. Facing her.
She leaned towards me, and we hugged tightly for a while. Then she stepped back, and we
held each others arms, facing each other. Through whatever passes between our eyes and our
sad smiles, I realize that I have to come clean, and that I have to come to terms.
She hugs me briefly, and walks to doors on my right. I see a shadow waiting for her there;
maybe another guy? Probably the One for her.
Next, my Carlisle friends walk up to me, one by one, in single file (like they're waiting in line
for the HUB), and hug me...goodbye. Everyone wears the sad smile that is no doubt mirrored
on my face. Rich was the last of my CAR buddies to hug me. He turned, and left the ATS to
my right, with everyone else.
Back in reality, Irene's tape is beginning American Pie. I have my eyes closed, and I'm slowly
twirling around in the center of my room.. When American Pie gets to the upbeat part, All my
CAR friends, and Jen w/ the guy come back into the ATS thru my right, from a different set of
doors that I know was there, but is hidden from me.
Then, friends from Hopkins come in thru my left... the door we usually come into ATS thru.
They take their turn at hugging me. Faces I haven't seen distinctly in years smile at me.
We're all dancing to American Pie, as it slows for the ending. It stops, and we're stand there
silently, in the darkness, with our arms inked in a ring.
I drop to the floor slowly back in my room. I put my head between my knees and cried
quietly.
Ô
And ever since that night, I had myself. Surely, confidently. I finished off the transformation
that had started that distant day, that I remember like yesterday. The day I walked onto the
rolling green quad of Homewood Campus. I've come a hell of a long way, thanks to all of you.
Now, I can stand and face what will come; my Journey of Life. I think of things in terms of
CTY. I can honestly say that I come from Carlisle, where the ice cream is good, the rinas
dance, and people have the time of their lives.
Don't worry, I'm no longer obsessed with CTY. Everyone finds themselves thru a different
way. Mine happened to be CTY. I'm glad it was.
(Continued on page 6)
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