Profile Thingie

Profile!

OhOh The Obvious, Obligatory Profile (Ready?)

I guess its story telling time folks, and me being somewhat shy and self effacing, I don't know if I can do this...Anyway, I mean who would possibly want to know about the somewhat mundane experiences and minor facts and figures of moi?
Now lets be real about this, I've seen the sites of others on the web, and I've come to the conclusion that only the most egomaniacle, self-absorbed, self-acclaimed, legend-in-their-own-mind computer geek/cyber freak (sorry mom) would create a web page! No my friends, I will not stoop to that level of existance, although they do have the right to their "paths"...and to experience life in whatever form they choose, I will march to a different drummer!
Aww what the heck!
I was born in a small hut, on the outskirts of a little village on the island of Hawaii, somewhere in the pacific ocean, in the year 1957. We had little to eat, my father who is a "local boy" and being of a somewhat "relaxed nature" didn't work much, but, he has a heart as big as the sky, and he tended to follow it, well, he tried to, in his own "way". My dear mother, who is of stalworth japanese descent worked the night shift in the local health clinic, caring for the elderly village folk, making little money, but we were never left wanting for bandaides, anticeptic wipes and rubber gloves, which were really neat! (none of your business) All of which was purchased at 20% off from the clinic's pharmacy, I'm sure mom has all the receipts!
I was blessed with the companionship of 4 wonderful sisters, and since we were all close in age, (unfortunately, my parents weren't familiar with the "single child theory") we frolicked and played through our days together as a brother with 4 sisters normally would. They survived, and now Shawn, Terri and Hope (gee, I just had an image of those witches, cackling around a big black cauldron, in that Hamlet story by that Shakespear guy, flash in my mind!) all have families of their own, except for...poor dear Christina.

A typical day around the hut consisted of being gently wakened by the beautiful tropical bird song outside the cutout window, and the sound of my father snoring, having just come home from a night out with...da boyz. (he was eventually invited to leave the village and now lives on the side of our Mt. Mauna Kea, where he contemplates the meaning of life, and sells hats and unusual figurines, made out of palm frawns, to the tourists at the airport, and making a killing at it!). Soon after, my mother would arrive home, and gather us children around her for our daily rations of bandaides and anticeptic wipes...its not that I was a mean brother, I just played a little too rough, sometimes. We then would have breakfast...hotdogs and rice...still my favorite meal! We then would all head off to school, (or maybe not) for our daily indoctrinization...I mean lessons...in proper social conduct and world history. (to be continued...)

Moving forward in time...(one of those "flash backs," only forward) we all actually grew up relatively normal...(I have papers to prove it) Except for my poor dear sister Christina...I won't go into it now, but suffice it to say that we try to visit often, but she has gotten quite violent these past years, and there's that thing with my sister Hope...no, Terri...or was it Shawn? I can't really tell, but as long as she takes her medication, everything is JUST FINE! I also have 3 of the finest brothers-in-laws a brother-in-law could have (credits:Steve; married to my sister Shawn, Peter; married to my sister Terri, and Randy; married to my sister Hope)...and how they do it, I really don't know...no, I mean it...I REALLY DON'T KNOW.

But seriously folks, (get out your hankie) I have a great family, my Mom is the best you could ever hope for, as are my sisters, and I am the lucky "only son & brother". They have beautiful, intelligent, bright, happy kids...and of course I'm their favorite uncle, right Sarah? I myself have 3 children that would make any parent proud, Jacob Kaulike - 21, Joshua Shane - 20 and JessicaJun Hokulani (the princess) who is 15...three very bright lights in my life, and here's that obligatory "Family Shots" page! (and, If I've missed any other family member's brownie points, I'm sure you'll let me know, and I'll be sure to include yours in subsequent instalments) (to be continued...)

Speaking of my life, I actually graduated from Hilo High School in 1975 (no really, I have papers to prove it), so if you're reading this, and a classmate, email me! Did a stint in the army where I got to travel some: Germany, Netherland, France, the Southern States of America. Even had some time to visit the New England States of America also. Did a bit of college and tech school (partying mostly... i was just set loose from the army, and young then) on the g.i. bill (thank you very much United States Government), had a bunch of different jobs, owned a swimming pool business and was a real estate appraiser. At present moments, I do freelance computer/network setup and repair services (6 years now), and going back to college (re-inventing the wheel) for an Info Tech degree. Divorced goin on...10 years, and am into "The River of Life as experience & perspective, Being in the moment, going w/ the flow...", etc.
Anywayz, I've also built my own home, from a book I got from Ace Hardware (hey, thats a plug, I wonder if they'd sponser my page?).

Back to the profile...I guess you could say I'm a jack-of-all-trades..."yep, sniff," (hitchin up the 'ol levi's) thats me (yeah, I either know very little about alot of things, or alot about nothing in particular). I'll share something with you, since if you got this far you must be either interested, or just got nothin better to do...I have this dream to be a writer (now, I didn't say I was one so hold off w/ the snide remarks)...and live in Scotland. (which is an actual dream...I'm in Scotland [I can tell from the bagpipe music and...I just Know! okay?], and I am writing something in a notebook, and there's sheep...don't ask me, I have no idea) Now how's that for a deep, unsolicited, open, sensitive type sharing experience? You won't find that on just any old page out there in cyberspace. Think about it.(not to be continued)

Just in case:
Some years ago, I had the opportunity to take a Greyhound bus trip, from Boston to San Francisco, it was a misguided attempt to save some money.
So, for anyone contemplating that trip, I have one, maybe two suggestions: DON'T DO IT!!! Or, Go For It!, at the very, very least, if through your drug or head injury induced, perversely masochistic haze, you still feel a need to punish yourself for any past wrongs done, then consider taking an "Express", as opposed to a "Local".
Believe me, stopping to pick-up, and drop-off, ALL THE WAY to the west coast, is NOT, a whole lotta fun! Take a plane, take a train, take a valium, have a friend drive over you with their truck, in a gravel pit, or pluck every hair off your body, with duct tape, but DO NOT Take A Local...
I cannot stress the importance of this point more, than to say it was: THE 5 day, 4 night, sitting in a claustrophobic, no shower stop...soon-to-be smelly, mind and butt numbing, "why did I quit drinking and drugging?", "my goodness, my socks can standup by themselves!", HELP, I can't feel my @ss!" bus ride, from HELL!
Other than that, it was a very, very interesting adventure, and, have a nice trip!

Thaaats All for now folks... (now, wasn't that SshPESHAL?)

(Ohh LoOk!
He put a pic on the page Uhuu!)
"Gettin 'jiGGy wiD iT, following a rousing Nintendo challenge,
Shane then had dinner & went to a movie."
Don't forget to floss.

Who Is This Guy? Ohh the percs of early parole! (j/k!)

circa 1997

(Ohh heeere's the kids too! Uuu!)
Yes folks, I am the biological father of these beautiful people seated next to me!
Jessica (Jessie), Jacob and Joshua

There are very special people here...Jacob, Joshua & Jessie, and yes...even me!

circa Easter 98

(NOTICE: To All Gov. Agencies -- Jacob, Didn't Do It!)

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