About Lallu

Lallu or Lalloo (depending on which part of God's country you were brought up in), is an eminently lovable person,
as lovable as he is nasty and uncaring. He bungles so much, you love him. You love his bumbling self.
He makes others look so boring and pale - you miss him badly when he's not around.

But he is far from cute. He probably doesn't even look good. He is imaginary and fictitious, but there's one like him in every
software organization. At least one. He's probably not too tall which accounts for his behavior, which is actually what we are more interested in than how he looks.

He doesnt care about people at all - you or me, we dont matter. He doesn't care about the customer, either. We are all just means to a higher end. His only care is to get more business, get the customer to pay up for nothing and then move on to the next sucker. He thinks business is all about making suckers of others. He has no conscience.

He probably has an inferiority complex - probably has a slight yank accent also. He believes in appearances. Only. Even though his own doesn't amount to much. Calls himself "a marketing person" in front of techies, dont know what he calls himself in front of customers, but certainly something that covers up for his inadequacies.

Has no respect for others. Hates shaking hands with subordinates. Behaves like he's been handed a turd.

Heck, now you'll say I'm describing the average Northie. It does seem like that. Cos most probably he is one. Southies aren't
generally so arrogant, self serving and disrespectful.

But whatever you may say, we chose him to be the leader of our company and we stand by him. We chose him because he
hates us workers, us techies, us computer guys. He likes flashing his tie, he chooses his wardrobe and habits by watching others who make him feel inferior, he has no tastes of his own, no preferences. Life is a game, to be won at all cost. There is no "WE" for him. He loves wearing formal clothes because he feels he can hide behide them. He likes suspenders ever since he saw some CEO wearing them. He probably doesnt know what his socks should match - his shoes, his trousers, his shirt or his tie. He keeps looking back to see if anyones giggling or talking about him. He likes shiny stuff- a gold watch, shiny cuff-links, shiny tie-clip...It doesn't matter whether he can carry it or not, he must be seen in it.

We chose him because the customers choose him. As long as customers agree to do business with such persons we shall have to. Until customers demand that they get to talk to us, we shall feature him in our issue. Because he determines our lives, how much we earn, where we reach, what we do. He rules us.

But he knows that as long as he works in this country - he stands naked in front of us, he has no cultural or linguistic differences to hide behind, we can see right through him. His expressions, his tone expose him instantly. His words make us laugh. He can only survive with persons of a different culture. For a short time.
 
 

"I hate people. I think they should suffer as much as
 possible, and therefore I'm into those old communist
         dictatorships."  - Euronymous, Mayhem 1