I loved you more than I could bear, I let myself believe. I've cried until my gut wrenched. I thought about you today... again. I thought of your laugh, those eyes so many wanted. I thought about you holding my hand, gently pressing your lips to mine. I thought about how you cried in my arms, I hurt too. I thought of your smile when I arrived, and of your parting glance. I thought about how you made me feel the night you said "I love you." I thought about how jealous I would get whenever someone else touched you. I thought about how cute you were, even in ugly shoes. I thought about how you fell asleep on me, when I was still kissing you. I thought about how you grind your teeth, what pain you must have been through. I thought about all the times I could have, but didn't say I love you. I do. I thought about how I messed up your hair the way I like to do. I thought about how you tried to bite me the first time I slept with you. I thought about how your ex would haunt you, I didn't want to hurt you too. I thought about how I can't get over you. I thought about how you'd fell asleep while I watched a movie, in my arms. I thought about how I would talk to my friends, telling them all about you. I was happy to be me then. I can't stop thinking about you. I thought about how you would clean up after me, I knew you loved me. I thought about how you never shared your past, I wanted to know all about you. I thought about how I gave you a friend, you needed one to hold on to. I thought about how other people treated you, I never understood your reactions. I thought about how I promised never to decieve you, to always be honest and true. I thought that's what love was about... I thought I knew. I'm thinking about how you are feeling, my imagination is all that I have. I've been dreaming about how I would like to hold you, tell you that everything's ok. I thought about how you showed me love, I never knew it could be so good. I never knew how to love until I loved you. I've thought about how I can make it all better, get back the friendship I held so dear. I've thought about how I could sacrifice, just to have you near. I've thought about hurting you again, those thoughts are fleeting, and only when I'm sad. When am I not sad? I've thought about the man you chose over me, he is a good friend I know. I'm sorry for thinking you would cheat on me with him, I projected the future that way. I thought about the moment I lost you, I think it was when we began. I don't think I'll love the same again, I don't think I want to. I reserve that for you. I've thought about sending this message to you, I don't think it's right for me to. I've thought about how soon you will move on, maybe you already have. I've thought about all the sex you achieve, I am sad. I've thought about coming over and giving you a hug, I want nothing more than that. I've thought about what would happen if we met on the street, I don't know how you would react. I've thought about trying to get over you, I'm not ready for that. I've thought about doing what you would do, I can't be like that.

I've thought about you... again.