DISCLAIMER AND AUTHOR'S NOTE: All Buffy The Vampire Slayer stuff belongs to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy and Warner Brothers. No copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. All other characters that appear belong to me. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies may be made for private use only and must include this copyright notice and disclaimer. There is some subtext in this story. If this kind of stuff is not legal where you live, if you're under 18 or if you don't like the notion of two women being in love, then you should find something else to read. There's also incest, abuse, rape and murder here, so be warned. This is an AU story, partly inspired by the movie Hayley Wagner, Star. By the way, Alyson Hannigan had a minor role there and she looked hot. Just FYI.

How Can You Love Me?
By Kristjan Brezovnik

"God, Dad, this is such a god forsaken town," Buffy complained when she got out of the car.

"Don't worry, honey, I'm sure you'll like it here," Mrs Summers said.

Buffy rolled her eyes.

"I bet there aren't even any decent clubs around here."

"At least there aren't any reporters here," Mr Summers said.

"And it's close enough to LA so that you can continue to host that show of yours," Mrs Summers added.

Buffy made a face.

"Yeah, I guess." She sighed. "But I don't know anyone here."

"School starts in a week and I'm sure you'll find some new friends then."

Buffy groaned.

"More like groupies."

"What's a groupie?" Buffy's younger sister Dawn asked.

Mr and Mrs Summers looked at one another, both blushing slightly, and Buffy ignored her.

"It's a sort of fan," Mrs Summers said.

"A fanatic fan," Mr Summers added and then frowned at the phrase.

"Oh," Dawn said, accepting the explanation.

"Sunnydale," Buffy said, disgusted. "I wonder which moron came up with that name."

Her parents glanced at one another, hoping that Buffy would calm down soon.

When her mother dropped her off at Sunnydale High one week later, Buffy looked around. She hated school, acting was far more fun. She sighed and walked toward the main entrance, wondering how many fans she'd end up having.

"Oh my god, you're Buffy Summers!"

Buffy groaned internally and turned around. She saw that it was a group of girls and by the look of them she figured they were the elite. Okay, maybe groupies wouldn't be a problem if these girls would drive them away.

"Yes," she said.

"Hi, I'm Cordelia and these are my friends."

Buffy wondered what kind of name was Cordelia, but then again her own name was Buffy, so she couldn't exactly ask the question.

"Hi," Buffy said.

"Don't tell me you've moved here," Cordelia continued.

"Em, yes, I have. A week ago."

Cordelia beamed.

"Ooh, this is so cool," she said and took Buffy by the arm.

Cordelia started chatting away and Buffy groaned internally, wondering if hanging out with Cordelia and her friends was really worth avoiding the fans.

"So, what are you having the first period?" Cordelia asked when they got inside.

Buffy thought for a moment.

"Chemistry."

"Really? Me too," Cordelia said, excited. Then she frowned. "Though you might have to be Faith's partner."

"Who's Faith?"

"Oh, a nobody. She's a real troublemaker."

"And a whore," one of Cordelia's friends, Harmony, added.

"Oh," Buffy said.

"Look, there she is," Cordelia said and pointed at a dark-haired girl at the back of the class.

"She's going to have to be her partner," Harmony said, looking around the room.

Cordelia looked as well.

"Yes. Be careful," she told Buffy and went off with Harmony to their places.

Buffy took a deep breath and went to Faith. On the way, she noticed that people were staring at her, some simply because she was a girl and some because they recognized her. She hoped they wouldn't annoy her.

"Em, hi," she said when she got to Faith.

Faith quickly closed the book she was reading and then looked at her. She nearly gasped, but she restrained herself.

"What?" she said, hoping she didn't sound too hostile.

"Looks like I'm your partner," Buffy said, staring into Faith's eyes, captivated.

Faith didn't move for a few moments, also captivated by Buffy's eyes, but then she finally forced herself to look away. She looked around the room and saw that everyone else had a partner. She also noticed that everyone was staring at them. She sighed and removed her bag from the adjacent seat.

"Thanks," Buffy said and sat down. "I'm Buffy."

Faith looked at her, wondering what kind of name was Buffy, but she didn't say anything, deciding that the name suited Buffy just fine.

"Faith," she said.

"Hey," Buffy said with a smile, but Faith looked away.

Buffy was surprised and she didn't know whether to be relieved or insulted by Faith's attitude. She sighed and looked away as the teacher entered the classroom.

"How was it?" Cordelia asked Buffy after class.

"Did she touch you?" Harmony asked.

Buffy frowned.

"Why would she touch me?"

"Because she's gay," Cordelia said.

"I think she's bi," Harmony said. "She's doing boys."

"Whatever," Cordelia said, not interested in details.

"She ignored me," Buffy said.

"Oh. Well, come on, let's go out."

"Are you coming to the Bronze in the evening?" Harmony asked.

"Bronze?" Buffy asked.

"A local club," Cordelia said. "The only one worth going to." She sighed. "Though I bet it's nothing like the clubs in LA."

"Probably not," Buffy agreed.

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"Ah, no," Buffy said.

"Great! I can introduce you to Riley."

"Riley?" Buffy asked skeptically.

"Yes. He's a great guy."

"Then why aren't you dating him?"

Cordelia smiled.

"Because I got Angel and he's even better."

"Oh."

"Don't worry, you'll like him. He's a real sweetheart."

Buffy didn't comment, not very enthusiastic about matchmaking.

"Watch where you're going!" Harmony snarled at a shy redhead.

"Sorry," the girl mumbled and scurried away.

"Some people have no manners."

Buffy raised an eyebrow, wondering which of the two had less manners.

"That was Willow," Cordelia explained. "She's the resident genius. She's a geek, but if you need help with anything, she's the one to talk to."

"Okay," Buffy said slowly.

"Hey," Buffy said when she walked up to Faith in Biology classroom. "Looks like I'm your partner again."

Faith looked around and when she saw it was true, she removed the bag from the adjacent seat. Buffy sat down and frowned when Faith ignored her again. She wanted to ask her if she didn't recognize her, but she decided against it, it was refreshing that someone didn't know her.

"What?" Faith snarled at her when she noticed that Buffy was staring at her.

"Eh, nothing, sorry. I was just curious about you."

Faith snorted.

"I'm sure your friends told you all you need to know about me."

"Well, they said some things, but…"

"Then you better believe them," Faith said and looked away, having a strange feeling in her stomach.

Buffy stared at her, shocked. No one had ever treated her like that before. Sure, it was nice being just a regular girl, but she didn't like Faith's treatment.

"There's no need to be rude," she said quietly.

"Then mind your own business," Faith said.

Buffy gasped, but she didn't comment. It annoyed her that for some reason she liked Faith, in spite of the way she treated her. She sighed and looked away.

"So, how was your first day?" Mrs Summers asked when Buffy came home.

Buffy shrugged.

"So-so."

"Did you make any new friends?"

Buffy made a face.

"Yeah, I guess."

Mrs Summers raised an eyebrow.

"You guess?"

"Well, they're the elite. I'm just not sure yet if I like them that much."

"Why?"

Buffy shrugged.

"I don't know. They seem kinda lame," she said and Mrs Summers chuckled. "We'll see. I'm going to the Bronze with them tonight."

"Where?"

"A local club. Cordelia says it's decent."

"Okay."

When Cordelia picked her up in the evening, Buffy was forced to listen to her incessant babbling about fashion and boys and stuff and it bored Buffy. Not that she wasn't interested in the topic, it was just that she liked to participate in the conversation, not just listen to it. She wondered if Cordelia's groupies were just dumb or if they wanted to feel important. She decided it was probably both. Of course, she didn't come to this god forsaken town to be the center of attention, she'd had enough of that in LA. She just wanted a break from the press and she hoped she would get it here, even though she didn't agree with her parents' choice of town.

When they finally arrived to the Bronze, it reminded Buffy of the official parties she had gone to, only on a smaller scale and the people were all… common. She noticed that people were staring at her and she groaned internally, hoping none would come to her asking for an autograph.

"Oh, there they are!" Cordelia said excitedly and led the way. "Angel!"

Angel turned and Buffy had to admit her was a hunk. And so was his friend.

"Hey," Angel said when they got closer, and kissed Cordelia.

"Angel, Riley, this is Buffy Summers. Buffy, meet Angel and Riley."

"Hi," Angel said with a smile.

"Hi," Buffy said, relieved that he wasn't drooling.

"Hi," Riley said, smiling.

Buffy smiled back.

"Hey," she said, blushing a bit.

"Aren't you a movie star?" Riley asked.

Buffy groaned internally.

"Yes," she said.

"Wow. So what are you doing here?"

"We moved here."

"Really? How come?"

Buffy noticed that Cordelia dragged Angel away and she bit her teeth, not really to happy to have been left alone with Riley.

"Well, after my last movie, I was besieged by the press and I needed a break."

"Oh. So, what grade are you in?"

"Tenth. You?"

"I'm in college, first year."

"Oh."

The conversation died for a moment.

"Do you want to dance?" Riley then asked hesitantly when a new song came on.

Buffy listened to the music for a moment and then decided to give it a try.

"Okay."

"How was it?" Cordelia started interrogating Buffy the next day.

Buffy smiled.

"It was okay."

"Okay? Just okay?"

"Well, it was pretty awkward at first, but then we went dancing and we relaxed. And he didn't bug me about being a movie star."

"Are you going out with him again?"

Buffy smiled again.

"Yes."

"Great!" Cordelia said, excited. "Maybe we can do a double date sometime."

Buffy groaned internally.

"Yes, sure," she said, not really too happy about it.

The next few weeks passed extremely fast for Buffy and she and Riley became a couple. She spent most of her free time with him, yet for some reason, she also liked to hang out with Faith. Of course, that wasn't exactly the right word as Faith, in spite of the strange vibes she was sending out, mostly ignored her. She had seen her dancing at the Bronze a couple of times, but Faith stopped every time she noticed her. For some reason Buffy enjoyed watching Faith dance, so she tried to make sure she remained unnoticed by Faith for as long as she could. Occasionally, however, like tonight, Faith was a no-show and Buffy found that she missed her. Especially when Riley had to stay in to study and she was at the Bronze alone. She stayed for a while and then decided to go home.

Faith was just switching bars when she heard a familiar voice scream for help. A chill ran through her body and she ran toward the source. When she saw three men trying to rape Buffy, she became furious, but she barely managed to stop herself when she saw that nothing serious had happened to Buffy yet. She took a deep breath.

"Cut the crap, guys," she said calmly.

"Who the…" one of them started. "Oh, Faith," he said and paled when he recognized her.

"Let her go," Faith said.

"Em, yeah, sure, no problem."

The men let go of Buffy and started to back off.

"Don't let me catch you doing that again," Faith said.

"Yeah, sure," the man said and they ran away.

Faith hesitated for a moment.

"You okay?" she asked, not wanting to appear as though she cared.

Buffy looked at her, teary-eyed. She nodded, wiping her tears.

"Yes."

Faith hesitated again.

"Good," she then said and turned to leave.

"Wait!" Buffy called and quickly got up.

Faith stopped.

"Thank you," Buffy said up when she caught up with Faith.

Faith felt all warm inside by the thanks, but she only shrugged.

"Whatever."

"Can… Can you walk me home? Please?"

Faith stared at Buffy for a few moments and then nodded. She knew exactly how Buffy was feeling, but she didn't want to get too close to her, she couldn't afford to.

"Thanks," Buffy said and followed Faith.

"Em, this is it," Buffy said when they got to her house. "Thanks again for…"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Faith said and quickly left, leaving a confused Buffy behind.

Buffy hesitated for a moment and then went in.

The next morning, Buffy looked for Faith.

"Em, Faith?" she said when she found her.

Faith looked at her.

"Yeah?"

"Em, thanks again, you know, about…"

"Yeah, whatever," Faith said and looked away.

Buffy stared at her, feeling hurt for some reason.

"Why are you always so rude?" she asked.

Faith gulped, but she quickly suppressed her emotions. She looked at Buffy.

"Why are you always pestering me? Leave me alone," she said, a part of her already regretting what she had said.

Buffy started at her, shocked.

"Well, sorry for trying to be nice to you," she said and stormed away, hurt.

Faith stared at her for a few moments. Then she looked away, feeling bad for being rude to Buffy.

"Buffy," Riley said with a smile as he met with Buffy at the Bronze in the evening.

Buffy smiled at him.

"Hi."

Riley hugged her and Buffy tensed for a moment, remembering the previous night.

"I hope you weren't bored yesterday," Riley said as he let go of her.

Buffy bit her teeth and then forced a smile.

"No, not at all. How was the presentation?"

"Okay, I guess. It was really out of the blue, especially since the semester just started."

"Yeah."

"Oh look, there are Cordelia and Angel."

"Let's stay by ourselves," Buffy asked.

Riley looked at her, surprised.

"You sure?"

Buffy nodded.

"Yes."

Riley glanced at Cordelia and Angel.

"Okay," he then agreed.

As the first tests came up, Buffy discovered that she had serious problems with Biology and she decided to seek help.

"Willow, right?"

Willow turned.

"Oh, Buffy, hi," she said, excited that Buffy was talking to her.

Buffy smiled.

"Listen, I'm having some problems with Biology. Em, I was told that you tutor people?"

Willow beamed, awed that a movie star was asking her to tutor her.

"I do." Then she frowned. "But if you want someone really good, you should talk to Faith."

Buffy frowned, surprised.

"Faith?"

Willow nodded.

"Yes. I mean, you two are lab partners, I'm sure she'll help you. I mean, I'd help you myself, but I already have four people scheduled and it's kinda tight."

"Oh." Buffy thought about it. "And you think Faith would help me?" she asked skeptically, remembering how Faith treated her.

Willow shrugged.

"Sure, why not? I mean, as far as I've seen, you're not treating her like Cordelia or her friends."

"Well, that's true," Buffy agreed. "But she doesn't exactly strike me as a helping person."

Willow smiled.

"She's okay. She keeps mostly to herself though. She helps me."

Buffy raised an eyebrow.

"You?"

Willow nodded.

"Yes. I mean, I understand most of the stuff, but I ask her when I don't."

"Oh."

"If she won't help you, you can come to me and we'll see if I can squeeze you in."

"Are you sure? I mean, you're busy."

"I think I can manage."

Buffy smiled.

"Okay. Thanks. I'll see you around."

Buffy left and Willow stared after her, excited.

It didn't take Buffy long to find Faith. She took a deep breath and approached her.

"Hey," she said when she came close enough.

Faith looked at her.

"Hey," she said after a few moments and Buffy was relieved that she didn't sound hostile.

She crouched next to her.

"Em, I'm having some problems with Biology. I talked to Willow, but she said she's busy and she recommended you. So, em, would you help me out?"

Faith stared at Buffy for a while, thinking. Buffy's request was definitely unexpected and she didn't know how to react. On one hand, she didn't want to get too close to Buffy, but on the other, Buffy was one of the few people that treated her with some sort of respect.

"Okay," she finally said and was awarded with Buffy's smile.

"So, em, do you want me to come to your house or…"

"No," Faith said and immediately realized she said it a bit too fast. "I'll come to yours."

"Okay," Buffy said. "Can you come today?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. At four?"

Faith nodded.

"Okay."

Buffy smiled.

"Good. Thanks. I'll see you later then," she said and left.

Faith stared after her, having that strange feeling in her stomach again.

"Did you talk to her?" Cordelia said when Buffy rejoined them.

"Yes, I did, but she's busy. She recommended Faith."

"What? You're not actually considering that, are you?"

Buffy shrugged, annoyed.

"I already talked to Faith and she said yes."

"She did?" Harmony said, surprised.

"Yes. She's coming over at four."

"At least you're not going over to her house," Aura said.

"Yes," Harmony agreed. "At least you won't be completely alone with her."

Buffy didn't comment. Sure, Faith was a loner, but that didn't mean that they had to talk about her like she was some sort of monster. After all, she did save her from rapists. Her friends started to chat away, but Buffy tuned them out, thinking about Faith.

As Faith approached Buffy's house, she got more and more nervous. It was a fancy house, like Willow's, and she wasn't exactly used to fancy houses. When she got to the house, she hesitated nervously for a few moments before knocking.

A young girl opened and Faith stared at her, startled.

"Can I help you?" the girl asked curiously.

"It's for me, Dawn," Buffy said as she hurried closer.

"Oh," Dawn said and stepped aside.

"Hey," Buffy said with a smile. "Come in."

Faith entered and Dawn closed the door behind her.

"Em, Faith, this is Dawn. My sister. Dawn, this is Faith," Buffy then introduced them.

"Hi," Dawn said. "Nice outfit."

"Thanks," Faith said, surprised.

"I wanted Mom to buy me a leather jacket, but she said I was too young," Dawn went on and Faith couldn't help but smile a bit.

"Dawn," Buffy stopped her, staring at Faith, surprised to see her smile.

"What?" Dawn said and looked at Buffy, annoyed.

"Go away. Faith's here to help me with Biology."

"Oh." She looked back at Faith. "Bye," she said and ran away.

"Sorry about that," Buffy said.

"Whatever," Faith said, her face neutral again.

Buffy realized that perhaps Faith liked the way Dawn talked to her and that she shouldn't have interrupted.

"Em, come on, let's go to my room," she said and led the way.

"How'd it go?" Cordelia asked when she and her friends surrounded Buffy at the Bronze.

"Okay."

"She didn't touch you?" Harmony asked.

Buffy sighed, annoyed.

"No, she didn't. We studied, nothing else happened." She looked around. "Has Riley come yet?"

"No," Cordelia said. "Angel said they'll be a bit late."

"Oh." She sighed. "I'm going to get me a drink," she said and went to the bar.

When she got to the bar, she had to wait for the bartender to come around. She looked around and noticed Faith, who was at the bar, nursing a drink. She hesitated for a moment and then went to her.

"Hey."

Faith turned and Buffy smiled at her.

"Hey," Faith said, her eyes darting around trying to locate Buffy's friends. "Where's your boy toy?"

Buffy frowned.

"Riley?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. He's gonna be late."

"Mmm," Faith said, not really caring.

"What'll you have?" the bartender asked as he came around.

"Orange juice, please," Buffy said and the bartender left to fulfil the order.

Awkward silence followed, until the bartender brought Buffy her drink.

"Em, I'll see you tomorrow then," Buffy said.

"Yeah," Faith said and looked away.

Buffy hesitated for a few moments, feeling hurt by Faith's ignorant attitude, and then returned to her friends.

"Hey," Buffy said with a smile as she sat down next to Faith a few weeks later.

"Hey," Faith said, trying to not feel too excited.

"Riley asked me to the Homecoming Dance."

"That's nice," Faith said neutrally, even though she felt jealous of Riley, which bothered the hell out of her.

"Have you got a date yet?"

"No, I'm not going," Faith said and Buffy's smile immediately vanished.

"Why not?"

Faith shrugged.

"What for?"

"To have fun."

Faith snorted.

"Dressing fancy is not really my style."

"If clothes are the problem, I can give a dress. Or we can go shopping."

Faith stared at Buffy for a few moments, surprised.

"No, thanks," she said.

"But…"

"I'm not going anyway, the clothes are not the problem."

"Oh," Buffy said, disappointed.

"Hey," Buffy said the next Monday as she sat beside Faith, and Faith immediately noticed that something was wrong.

"Hey," she said, considering whether she should get involved and ask what was wrong or not. She decided that she should, since Buffy was the closest thing she had to a friend beside Willow and Xander. "What's wrong?"

Buffy rolled her eyes.

"I've had it with Cordelia and her groupies."

Faith raised an eyebrow, surprised.

"Yeah?"

Buffy sighed.

"Yes. I tried, you know? I really tried, but she's so self-centered like she was a movie star or something. And her groupies, they're like the unused parts of her mind."

Faith grinned at that and Buffy marveled at how pretty her smile was.

"Yeah, they are," Faith agreed and stopped grinning when she saw that Buffy was staring at her.

Buffy blushed when she noticed that Faith saw her staring.

"They totally ruined the Homecoming Dance. Thank god I didn't run for the Queen," she said and sighed.

"What about Riley?" Faith asked.

Buffy smiled a bit.

"He's okay. We're still together," she said and Faith's heart sank. She shook her head. "I wonder what Angel sees in Cordelia. She's so… so…"

"Self-centered?" Faith asked.

"Yeah. And lame and superficial and… Well, you get the picture."

Faith nodded.

"And besides, they keep bad-mouthing you and it got real old real fast."

Faith raised her eyebrows, surprised.

"You're not friends anymore with Cordelia because of me?"

Buffy blushed a bit.

"No, not just because of you." She sighed. "They're not real friends, you know? The sheep just hang out with Cordelia because she's popular and Cordelia tolerates them because they're rich."

"Oh."

Buffy hesitated for a moment.

"I like you better," she then said, trying not to blush.

"Right," Faith said neutrally.

"Really, I do. I mean, you're all tough and stuff, but I think you're okay."

Faith stared at Buffy, surprised, and then looked away, not wanting Buffy to see how much that meant to her.

Since hanging out with Cordelia and her groupies was out of the question now and Faith preferred to be alone, Buffy was forced to find new friends. Fortunately, that was easy. Willow and her friend Xander seemed to be friendly enough, even though they were still nervous about a movie star hanging out with them, especially since Cordelia was now giving them the evil eye more often than usually. Fortunately for Buffy, Riley didn't really care about their high school squabbles and he hung out with her even though Angel was with Cordelia.

And in all the mess, even Faith became less of a loner, and Buffy had a feeling that Faith actually liked hanging out with her. For some reason that made her happy. So when Halloween came up, she decided to try and get Faith to hang out with her for the evening.

"Faith," she said as she walked up to her during a break.

Faith looked up.

"Hey."

"Em, I was wondering. Would you come with me, Riley, Willow and Xander while we take Dawn and her friends trick-or-treating for Halloween?"

Faith raised an eyebrow, surprised. Buffy was asking her to join her and her friends, to hang out with them. That was certainly a first. She wasn't exactly sure what trick-or-treating was, but she had a feeling she knew. And she didn't exactly feel thrilled by dressing in a costume, not that she had the money for it.

"No, I don't think I can." She pretended to think. "No, can't, got work to do."

"Work? On Halloween?" Buffy said, surprised.

"Yeah, at home."

"Oh," Buffy said, disappointed.

"Well, if you can get out of it, come to my house sometimes till seven."

"Yeah, okay," Faith said, although she had no intention of going trick-or-treating.

Buffy smiled.

"Okay. I'll see you around then."

"Yeah."

Buffy hesitated for a moment and then left. Faith stared after her for a few moments, feeling bad for turning her down. Then she shook her head, pushing the thoughts away, and returned to her comics.

When the Halloween eve came, Faith seriously considered going to Buffy, but she finally decided against it. But curiosity got the better of her and she decided to go out and spy on Buffy. She felt bad for spying on Buffy, but she was curious to see how Buffy would dress up. So she went to Buffy's house and waited until Buffy and her friends came out.

Buffy looked truly awesome in her Red Riding Hood outfit. Not that Faith knew it was a Red Riding Hood outfit, never having heard the story. To her, it just looked cute. Riley, of course, was dressed up as a soldier and Faith found that just lame. Though she had to admit that he looked handsome. She briefly glanced over Willow's ghost and Xander's clown and then grinned when she saw that Dawn was wearing a very gothic outfit.

She followed them for a while, watching what they were doing. Her eyes were mostly riveted on Buffy. She realized that she felt more than just attracted to her and it scared her, especially when she realized that she was jealous of Riley, who was fawning all over Buffy. The only thing that made her feel even remotely good about the whole thing was the fact that Buffy looked mildly annoyed by Riley's advances.

Faith finally had enough and decided to go to a bar and get drunk. As usual.

"Hey," Buffy said with a smile when she came across Faith at the Bronze the next evening.

Faith looked at her and she felt butterflies in her stomach when she saw Buffy's smile.

"Hey."

"Too bad you couldn't come yesterday, we had a great time."

"Yeah."

"You should've seen Dawn, she was wearing a gothic outfit, complete with makeup. She looked really cool."

"What did you wear?" Faith asked, even though she knew.

Buffy blushed.

"I was Red Riding Hood."

"Oh. Cute," Faith said, deciding to find out more about Red Riding Hood, just in case.

Buffy smiled, blushing even deeper.

"Yeah." She hesitated for a moment. "And what did you do?"

Faith tensed for a moment and then shrugged.

"I was busy at home."

"Oh." Buffy glanced at her friends. "Wanna join us?"

Faith also glanced at Buffy's friends.

"Nah, I'm fine," she said. "I'll be leaving soon anyway," she added.

"Oh," Buffy said, disappointed. "Well, I'll see you around then."

"Yeah."

Buffy hesitated for a moment and then went off to her friends. Faith stared after Buffy, feeling bad for turning her down. Then she shook her head and returned to her drink. She nursed it for a while and then downed it in one gulp. As she got up to leave, she glanced at Buffy and saw her watching her. When Buffy smiled and waved at her, Faith felt her temperature rise. She briefly waved back and then quickly left, disturbed by the way Buffy made her feel.

Needlessly to say, Faith panicked again when Buffy asked her over for Thanksgiving a month later.

"Thanksgiving?" she said, regretting the fact that she had so little knowledge of holidays.

"Yeah. Mom's making a turkey for dinner and everyone's invited."

Faith considered the offer. On one hand, she didn't want to watch Buffy and Riley making out, but on the other, she wanted to hang out with her, get to know her better. Not to mention the food.

"Just dinner?" she asked.

"Yeah. Nothing special. We eat the turkey and watch a movie later."

Faith hesitated for a moment.

"Okay," she then agreed, hoping she wasn't making a mistake.

Buffy positively beamed when Faith accepted the invitation.

"Cool," she said and Faith's heart started to race. "I'll see you tomorrow at seven then."

"Okay."

"Faith!" Dawn said with a smile when Faith showed up for Thanksgiving dinner the next evening.

"Hey," Faith said nervously.

"Come on in."

Faith entered and Dawn closed the door.

"Em, I heard you wore a gothic outfit on Halloween," Faith then said, awkwardly starting a conversation.

Dawn beamed.

"Yeah. Wanna see the photos?"

Faith shrugged.

"Sure."

"I'll be right back," Dawn said and hurried upstairs, leaving Faith alone.

"Who was it…" Buffy started when she saw her sister run upstairs. "Faith!" she said with a smile when she saw it was Faith. "Hi."

"Hey," Faith said.

"Glad you could come."

"Yeah," Faith said, feeling strange when she saw Buffy so excited over her.

"Come, everyone else has already arrived."

Faith followed Buffy to the living room and was relieved that there weren't any gifts or anything strange.

"Hi, Faith," Willow said with a smile.

"Hey," Faith said.

"Okay, I know you two have seen each other, but anyway. Riley, this is Faith. Faith, Riley."

"Hi, Faith," Riley said.

"Hey," Faith said and waved at him a little, sizing him up.

"Where did Dawn go?" Buffy asked and Faith looked at her.

"Oh. She wanted to show me how she was dressed for Halloween."

"Oh."

Just then Dawn came running down the stars.

"Faith."

Faith looked at her.

"Yeah?"

"I got the photos," Dawn said and gave her the photos.

Faith slowly took a look at them.

"Nice," she said. "Real bad girl," she added with a grin and Dawn beamed.

"Thanks."

Faith winked at her and then looked at Buffy.

"You were cute."

"I was not!" Buffy protested, blushing.

"Sure you were."

"She's right," Riley said with a smile.

Buffy looked at him and smiled.

"What is this, a conspiracy?"

"Too bad you couldn't come," Dawn said as Faith gave her back the photos.

Faith shrugged, feeling uncomfortable.

"Yeah, well, I was busy at home."

"Oh."

"Dawn, go ask Mom when dinner will be ready."

"Okay," Dawn said and hopped off to the kitchen.

"Wanna join us?"

Faith glanced at the table as she slowly approached.

"What are you playing?"

"Poker."

Faith raised an eyebrow.

"And your mom allows it?"

"It's not like we're betting or anything."

"Except the cookies," Xander said.

"Yes."

"Okay," Faith said and followed Buffy.

Buffy sat down and patted the space beside her.

"Come."

Faith hesitated for a moment, nervous, and then sat beside Buffy.

"Here, your money," Xander said and gave Faith a bag of cookies.

"Thanks," Faith said.

"Dinner's in ten," Dawn said as she came from the kitchen.

"Okay," Buffy said.

"Come on, Buffy, I wanna play too," Dawn said, reopening the issue now that Faith was here.

"Dawn, I told you…"

"It's not like you're gambling. I mean, you're only playing for cookies."

"She does have a point, Buffy," Faith said and Dawn smiled.

"She's too young," Buffy said.

"Technically, so are we," Faith pointed out.

"Well, yeah, but we're in high school."

Faith blinked.

"Your point?"

Buffy stared at Faith for a few moments and then sighed.

"Alright," she allowed and Dawn clapped her hands excitedly.

"Thanks, Faith," she said and gave Faith a brief hug.

Faith was completely surprised, but she quickly recovered. She looked around nervously and was relieved that no one was paying attention. Except Buffy. When Faith saw Buffy smiling at her, she felt herself blush. She quickly looked at Dawn beside her.

"Ever played poker before?"

Dawn shook her head.

"No. But I watched them play."

Faith looked around.

"I'm gonna help her out, okay?"

"Okay," Buffy said.

It was Faith's first Thanksgiving dinner and she felt strange. Her family was never big on holidays. The only way her parents celebrated was by getting extra drunk, for which she usually paid the price. She was glad that she wasn't at the head of the table and so had the time to watch what the others were doing before doing it herself. The dinner was delicious and she let Mrs Summers know that after it was over.

"I gotta go now," she said when it was almost ten.

She didn't want to go, or need to, but she didn't feel very comfortable with so many people around. Sure, they more or less considered her their friend and she had to admit to herself that she liked them, but she didn't feel comfortable yet.

"Oh, look at the time," Xander said as she checked his watch. "I should go too."

"What time is it?" Willow asked.

"Nine fifty," Xander said and got up.

"Already?"

"Yes."

"Then I have to go too," Willow said and got up.

"Already?" Buffy asked.

"Yes."

"Oh," Buffy said, disappointed.

"I can stay for a while," Riley said, and Buffy smiled a bit.

She looked at Faith.

"Did you have a good time?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah." She hesitated for a moment. "Best Thanksgiving ever."

Buffy smiled.

"Great."

Faith smiled back a bit.

"I'll see you at school then."

"Yeah, okay."

Christmas was a crazy time, Faith knew. People always seemed so cheerful and full of goodness, as if it would make up for their being assholes the rest of the year. At least there were plenty of parties going on then and she could party for days while her parents got drunk. She knew about Santa and people shopping for gifts, but she had never experienced it before, at least not the part where the family would get together and exchange gifts or whatever it was that they were doing. So when Buffy invited her over for a party, she wasn't quite sure if she wanted to go. On one hand, it was a party and she loved parties, but on the other, it was a private party, a sort of a family get together, and she didn't want to make a fool of herself.

"I don't know," she said. "There are a couple of parties I planned to check out."

"Oh," Buffy said, disappointed.

Faith noticed Buffy's disappointment and she felt bad about it.

"I'll try to come," she said and gulped, hoping she wasn't making a mistake.

Buffy smiled a bit.

"Okay. I'll, em, see you around."

Faith nodded.

"Okay."

Buffy left and Faith stared after her, scared of the way Buffy made her feel. A part of her wanted to go to Buffy, spend time with her, but another part told her to stay away or risk getting hurt and ridiculed.

"Faith!" Buffy said excitedly when Faith showed up after all.

"Hey," Faith said, trying not to be nervous.

"Come in, come in."

Faith entered and Buffy closed the door.

"Em, you mentioned something about a party," Faith said, puzzled that there was no crowd and no music.

Buffy smiled.

"Yes, come on," she said and led the way.

Faith followed her to the living room. She frowned when she saw that there were only Willow, Xander, Dawn and Riley.

"Hi, Faith," Dawn said cheerily while the other three stared at her, obviously surprised that she had come.

"Hey," Faith said. Then she looked at Buffy. "Okay," she said slowly. "This is the party?" she asked.

Buffy nodded.

"Yes. We're having fun."

Faith glanced at her, wondering what the hell Buffy was talking about. This didn't look like a party, more like a mini mall or something with the tree and stuff. It didn't look like fun to her.

"Hello, Faith," Mrs Summers said as she came by.

"Em, hi," Faith said, nervous because the woman was so nice.

"Oh! I got you a present," Buffy suddenly remembered.

Faith looked at her, tensing. Present? She looked around and saw that there were indeed presents lying around. Was she supposed to bring a present? For each of them? She had no idea and she felt like she messed up. She sighed, regretting that she had come.

"Here," Buffy said and gave her a packet.

Faith stared at it for a few moments, surprised. Nobody had ever given her a present before. She hesitated for a moment, not sure if she should open it or wait. But then she remembered that others had apparently opened their presents, so she decided to open hers as well. She carefully started to unwrap it.

"Just tear it off," Dawn said.

Faith looked at her and then around the room. She saw that there was indeed discarded wrapping paper lying around. She felt so stupid. She looked back at the present and tore the paper off. When she saw what it was, her eyes went wide. It was a beautiful leather jacket.

"You like it?" Buffy asked nervously.

Faith nodded, still staring at the present, and Buffy smiled, relieved. Faith hesitated for a moment and then put the jacket on. It fit her like a glove.

"Nice," Xander said and Faith glanced at him.

"Faith, we just started a game of Monopoly," Dawn said. "Wanna join us?"

Faith looked at the girl, startled.

"What?"

"Monopoly. Do you wanna play?"

Faith looked at the game-board.

"Ah, no, that's okay," she said, not wanting to make a fool out of herself again.

"It's no problem," Dawn said, "Only two estates got bought."

Faith had no idea what she was talking about.

"No, really, it's okay."

"It's gonna be kinda boring if you just watch," Dawn pointed out.

"She's right," Buffy agreed. "Come on, it'll be fun."

Faith gulped, knowing that it wouldn't be polite to object.

"Okay," she said, hoping that she wouldn't make a fool out of herself. She went closer. "Em, it's been a while since I've played any game like that," she said. "Tell me the rules," she said and took off the jacket.

"Okay," Dawn said and quickly told her the rules as she counted the fake money for Faith.

Faith carefully listened, hoping that she would get the hang of the game. When she got the money, the game was on again.

Faith was watching what the others did and she quickly understood what to do. Once she got the hang of the game, she frequently glanced at Buffy, who had snuggled up against Riley. Her stomach felt funny, like something heavy was lying in it, as she watched Buffy and Riley snuggle. She realized she wasn't just jealous, she was scared. Jealousy she understood, but fear puzzled her. Sure, she was jealous because Buffy was with Riley, not with her, but fear? It took her a while before she realized she was afraid of losing Buffy. She was confused by the revelation at first. Why would she be afraid of losing something she didn't have in the first place? Then she realized that she wanted to have Buffy, even though she knew that she couldn't, she didn't want to drag her down into her world of violence and abuse. She forced herself to push the thoughts of Buffy away and concentrate on the game.

After the game, which Willow won, they watched a Christmas movie. Faith found the whole thing stupid at first, but then she couldn't help but like it. She felt like crying as the plot unraveled, but she pushed the tears back, she didn't want the others to think that she was a sissy. She did wonder, however, if things like in the movie actually happened in the real world.

Buffy, who was cuddled up against Riley, glanced occasionally Faith. She noticed how she was engrossed in the movie and she couldn't help but smile. In spite of the tough façade, Faith reminded her of a child. She wanted to get to know Faith better, but she just didn't know how to approach her.

After the movie, everyone went home. Willow and Xander went off together and Riley lingered behind, smooching with Buffy. Faith turned away, disgusted, and left, wearing Buffy's jacket.

"Hey," Buffy said as she sat down beside Faith a couple of weeks after the holidays.

"Hey," Faith said and quickly put away the book she was reading.

"Was that Blake?" Buffy asked, curious.

"Yeah," Faith said, embarrassed.

"I think he's good," Buffy said with a smile. "I didn't know you like poetry."

Faith shrugged.

"I don't, I was just bored," she lied.

"Oh." She hesitated for a moment, nervous. "Em, would you come to my birthday party?"

Faith tensed. Another Buffy party?

"When?" she asked.

"Tomorrow. At seven."

Faith pretended to think.

"I don't think I can make it," she lied and flinched when Buffy's face fell.

"Oh," Buffy said.

Faith sighed, angry with herself. On one hand, she wanted to spend time with Buffy, but on the other, she didn't want to get too close to her. And she also didn't want to make a fool of herself like she did for Christmas. She'd never been to a birthday party before and she had no idea of what it meant, never having a birthday party before or even being to one. She had no idea whether to bring a gift or not. And if so, for how many people. She sighed again.

"Willow," Buffy approached her friend a few days after her birthday.

"Yes?" the redhead asked and looked at her.

"Can you find out when Faith's birthday is?"

"Sure." She frowned. "Why don't you ask her?"

"I want to throw her a surprise party and I don't want her to suspect. And besides, she probably wouldn't want to tell me."

"Why not?" Willow asked, puzzled.

"Well, you know how she is, very private."

"Oh. Yeah, I guess." She nodded. "I'll hack into school computer in the afternoon and then call you."

"Okay, thanks."

A couple of weeks later, Buffy was depressed. Two days ago had been Valentine's Day and the next day Riley had left her. It was depressing, but, strangely, a part of her felt relieved. But things still didn't look up. Faith seemed to be avoiding her for some reason. Sure, she acted like everything was normal, but Buffy couldn't shake the feeling that Faith didn't want her around. She couldn't do anything about Riley, he had left Sunnydale, but she could do something about Faith. She hoped.

"Hey," she said as she sat beside her in the Chemistry lab.

Faith looked at her.

"Hey."

"Wanna go to the movies with me tonight?"

Faith's eyes went wide for a moment and her heart started to beat faster.

"What?"

"I asked if you want to go to the movies with me tonight," Buffy repeated.

Faith just stared at her for a few moments, shocked. The word 'date' came to mind, but she pushed it away, knowing that it was dangerous to make assumptions, she could only get hurt.

"Why?" she asked.

Buffy blushed for a moment.

"Because it's fun? They're playing a comedy."

"Why don't you go with Willow?"

"She can't."

"Oh," Faith said, feeling like a cheap substitute.

"So, you wanna go?"

Faith thought about it for a few moments.

"Okay," she then said, surprising herself.

Buffy smiled.

"Great! How about we meet at the Espresso Pump at seven thirty? The movie's at eight."

"Okay," Faith said, having a sinking feeling that she was making a big mistake.

"Hey," Buffy said when Faith came to the Espresso Pump a few minutes after her.

"Hey," Faith said, nervous.

"Wanna grab a bite before we go?"

Faith glanced at Espresso Pump.

"Nah, I'm cool."

"Okay," Buffy said and they started walking.

Since Faith was short on words and Buffy quickly ran out of things to talk about, their walk was mostly quiet. But that didn't bother them.

When they were waiting in line for the tickets, a boy approached them.

"You're Buffy," he said.

Buffy looked at him and smiled.

"Yes."

"Can I have your autograph?" the boy asked and offered her a pen and a piece of paper.

Buffy's smile widened.

"Sure," she said and took the offered items. "What's your name?"

"Josh."

"Okay, Josh," she said and gave him an autograph. "Here."

The boy look the piece of paper and smiled.

"Thank you," he said and rushed off to his mother, excited.

Faith observed the whole thing with a frown.

"What are you, a movie star or something?" she asked, confused.

Buffy looked at her, surprised.

"Yes. You didn't know?"

Faith shrugged.

"I don't watch TV much," she said, feeling strange about going to the movies with a celebrity.

"Oh."

"Hey, Faith," Buffy said as she walked up to Faith during a break a few days later.

Faith looked at her calmly, even though her heart was pounding in her chest.

"Hey," she said.

"Em, I need some help with Biology. Could you come by my house today?"

"When?"

"I don't know. At six?"

"Okay," Faith said.

Buffy smiled.

"Thanks."

Faith shrugged.

"Whatever," she said and turned away.

Buffy's face fell at the cold dismissal. She sighed and slowly left, wondering what was going on with Faith.

"Is she coming?" Willow asked.

Buffy nodded.

"Yes. At six."

"When do you want us to come?" Xander asked.

"Half an hour earlier? I mean, you can come any time you want, just…"

"Okay," Willow said.

Buffy smiled.

"Thanks, guys."

Faith arrived to Buffy's house exactly at six o'clock. She rang the bell and then waited. She was nervous, just like she was nervous every time Buffy was around. It annoyed her. She was startled out of her thoughts by the door opening.

"Hey," Buffy said with a smile.

"Hey," Faith said, her face neutral.

"Come in, come in."

Faith entered and Buffy closed the door behind her.

"Em, could you close your eyes for a few moments?" Buffy then said.

Faith raised an eyebrow.

"Why?" she asked suspiciously.

"Please," Buffy said. "Just for a few moments."

Faith hesitated for a moment, not liking surprises. But she knew that Buffy wouldn't hurt her, so she closed her eyes.

"Now what?" she then asked.

"Just let me guide you."

Faith reluctantly let Buffy guide her. She thought they would go far, but they stopped after a few moments. Buffy then let go of her and walked away. Faith got nervous, but she knew she wasn't in danger.

"Okay, you can open your eyes," Buffy said.

Faith did so.

"Surprise!" Buffy, Dawn, Willow and Xander called in unison.

Faith frowned, puzzled.

"Em, yeah, it is," she said, wondering what the hell was going on.

"Happy birthday, Faith," Buffy said with a smile as she came closer.

Faith frowned again. Birthday? She had a birthday? Well, of course she had a birthday, she just didn't know when it was, never having celebrated it before.

Buffy shook Faith's hand, startling her.

"Em, thanks," Faith said, feeling strange.

"Here," Buffy said and gave her a present.

"A present?" Faith said, surprised.

Buffy nodded, smiling.

Faith gulped, suddenly realizing that birthday parties were important to people and that she had screwed up when she didn't come to Buffy's birthday party. She felt her heart sink. Sure, she didn't want to get too close to Buffy, but… She sighed, she didn't know what she wanted when it came to Buffy.

She unwrapped the present and saw that it was a book. She opened it and saw that it was a book of poems.

"I saw you were fond of Blake, so I decided to get you something similar. At least in my opinion. Christina-Georgina Rossetti is one of the few poets I actually like."

Faith quickly scanned a poem and she liked it.

"Thanks," she said.

"Okay, I'm next," Dawn said and gave Faith her present.

Faith opened it and saw it was a CD.

"Kittie," Dawn said. "Buffy let me read through that book she gave you and I figured you'd like them."

"Thanks," Faith said, moved.

"Okay, we got you this together," Willow said and gave Faith the largest packet.

Faith took it, surprised. She unwrapped it and saw it was another book. This time, a book on advanced Chemistry.

"I know you like Chemistry, so we got you this," Willow said.

"Thanks," Faith said, unused to receiving presents, especially from so many people.

She was moved and it took every ounce of her will not to cry.

"Mom! It's cake time!" Dawn called.

Faith frowned. Cake?

"Right here," Mrs Summers said as she walked in a few moments later.

"Okay," Dawn said excitedly, "make a wish and blow out the candles."

Faith thought for a moment. What to wish for? She had plenty of wishes, but she didn't believe any of them would come true. She sighed.

"I wish…"

"No! Don't say it out loud," Dawn interrupted her.

Faith felt so stupid.

"I wasn't," she lied.

She took a deep breath and blew out the candles, wishing that somehow her life would turn out for the better.

"Okay," Mrs Summers then said, "you get to cut the first slice."

Faith took the knife and panicked for a moment, not knowing how big the slice should be. But then she remembered the slices from the Espresso Pump and she cut out a similar slice.

Everyone clapped, startling Faith. Mrs Summers then put the slice on a plate and gave it to Faith.

"Here you go."

"Thanks," Faith said, wondering what next.

Mrs Summers then took the knife and proceeded to cut out the slices for the others.

"What's it like?" Dawn asked. "Mom made it herself."

"Really?" Faith said, surprised.

Dawn nodded.

"Yes. She likes to cook."

Faith tried the cake.

"It's delicious," she said, liking the cake.

"Thank you," Mrs Summers said with a smile.

"She's right," Xander agreed, "this is great."

"Mhm," Willow said, her mouth full.

"I'm glad you like it," Mrs Summers said. "I've been experimenting a bit and I wasn't sure how it would turn out."

"It's great, Mom," Dawn said. "It's even better than the one you made for Buffy's birthday."

Mrs Summers smiled again.

"Thank you, honey." She cut one last piece for herself. "If you want more, help yourselves," she said and left.

"Let's play Monopoly," Willow suggested when they were alone.

"So you'd win again?" Xander asked with a smirk and Willow blushed.

"What? I can't help it if I'm good at it."

"Uh-huh."

"Faith, what do you want to play?" Buffy asked.

Faith shrugged.

"Doesn't matter," she said. "Monopoly sounds fine," she quickly added so as not to sound hostile.

"Okay."

"I'll get it," Dawn said and hurried away, having wolfed down her slice.

When Faith got home that night, she felt like that day was the best day of her life. She'd had her first birthday party, she got presents, she didn't make a fool out of herself and she spent time with people who actually liked her. The only thing that dampened her mood was the fact that she knew it couldn't last.

A week later they had a test scheduled and Buffy realized she needed some help. It wasn't that urgent, but she wanted to be sure she passed. And besides, she liked hanging out with Faith.

"Faith," she said as she walked up to her during a break.

Faith looked at her.

"Hey."

"Listen, I need some help for that Chemistry test. Do you have time today?"

Faith shrugged.

"Sure."

Buffy smiled.

"Okay. My place, four o'clock?"

"How about the library?" Faith suggested instead.

Buffy frowned.

"Okay."

Faith nodded.

"Good. I'll be there."

"Okay."

As Buffy walked away, she suddenly realized that the reason Faith didn't want to come over to her house was probably the surprise birthday party. She knew Faith didn't have a problem with the fact that it was a birthday party, it was the surprise part that probably bothered her. Buffy sighed, wondering how she could change that.

"Hey, Willow," Buffy said as they met during the lunch break a few days later.

"Hey," Willow said with a smile. "How was the test?"

Buffy rolled her eyes.

"I think I'll pass."

"That's good."

"Yeah. Listen, can you find out where Faith lives?"

"You don't know?"

"No."

"Oh. Okay. I'll call you in the afternoon."

"Okay. Thanks. I'll see you around."

"Okay."

In the afternoon, after Willow had called her and told her where Faith lived, Buffy decided to go check out the place. She consulted a map and then went there. But when she got to the neighborhood, she saw it was poor one. She kept looking over her shoulder, nervous.

When she finally got to Faith's house, she stared at it for a few moments and then quickly left, not wanting Faith to see her.

"How'd it go?" Willow asked Buffy then next day.

"What?"

"Your visit to Faith's house."

"Oh. I didn't go to her."

"But I thought…"

"No, I just went to see where she lives, I didn't go in."

"Oh. And?"

"It's a dump."

"That bad?"

"Yes," Buffy said and sighed.

"What's wrong?" Willow asked, noticing something was on Buffy's mind.

"Nothing." She hesitated for a moment. "It's just that I find myself thinking a lot about… Faith."

"Really?" Willow asked and smiled a little.

Buffy blushed.

"Yes." She sighed. "I'm a bit nervous."

"Why?"

"Well, I find myself thinking about doing… the triple X stuff with her."

Willow blinked.

"What stuff?"

Buffy's blush deepened.

"You know… sex."

"Oh," Willow said and blushed furiously.

Buffy smiled.

"Right. And it's just so… I don’t know." She sighed. "You know how reserved Faith is, right?"

"Yes."

"And I'm an actress. If she becomes a part of my life, people will want to know about her."

"So you want her to become a part of your life?"

Buffy blushed.

"Well, she's already a part of it. It's just… Well, you know… Does that mean I'm gay?"

Willow frowned.

"I don't know. Does it matter?"

Now Buffy frowned.

"Eh, people…"

"To you."

"To me?"

"Yes, to you. Forget about what people might think. Do you love Faith?"

Buffy opened her mouth and then closed it again. She sighed.

"This is all so confusing." She thought for a moment. "I don't know. I mean, sure, I think about… having sex with her and I like spending time with her, a lot, but I've never thought about being in love with her."

Willow thought for a moment.

"I think she likes you too much to just have sex with you," she then said.

Buffy looked at her, curious.

"You think she's gay?"

Willow shrugged.

"I don't know, but I know that she likes to hang out with you."

"Really?"

Willow smiled.

"Yes. You're just about the only person she likes to hang out with. I mean, she tolerates me and Xander, but she doesn't want to hang out with us."

"Oh." She thought for a few moments and then took a deep breath. "I need to think about this."

"Just be careful, you don't want to freak her out."

Buffy smiled.

"I know."

"Look, she's over there."

Buffy looked and smiled.

"Go talk to her," Willow said.

Buffy hesitated for a moment and then went to Faith.

"Hey," she said as she sat down.

Faith looked at her, startled.

"Hey."

They stared at one another for a few moments and then Buffy nodded at the book Faith was reading.

"Blake?"

Faith glanced at the book.

"Yeah."

Buffy smiled. She thought for a moment and then decided to think about loving Faith first. She took out a book of her own and pretended to study.

Faith stared at her for a few moments and then returned to her book.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Mrs Summers asked Buffy a couple of days later when she saw her thinking about something again.

"Huh?" Buffy said, startled, and looked at her.

"You're thinking again," Mrs Summers said as she sat beside her on the sofa. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Buffy took a deep breath.

"I've been thinking about Faith," she then said. She hesitated for a moment. "I think I'm in love with her," she admitted, looking at her hands, nervous.

"I see."

Buffy sighed.

"I talked to Willow about it and I've gotten over my concern about what people might say. I'm not even worried whether that makes me gay or not. It's just… I feel attracted to Faith and not just sexually. I like spending time with her." She took a deep breath. "I don't know." She hesitated for a moment. "I'm scared a bit. I mean, what if she doesn't love me?"

"You won't know unless you ask her."

"But what if she freaks out? What if she won't want to be my friend anymore?"

"I'm sure she'll still want to be your friend," Mrs Summers said and put her hand on Buffy's shoulder.

Buffy sighed.

"This is such a mess." She thought for a moment. "I'll observe her for a while."

A few weeks later, Faith's father was released from jail. When Faith saw him, she just froze.

"Hello, slut," her father leered. "Long time no see."

Faith just stared at him, her eyes wide.

"Aren't you gonna greet your daddy?" her father asked as he came closer.

Faith's mouth opened and closed a few times, but nothing came out.

"Where's your mother?"

Faith blinked.

"O-Out. Shopping."

She swallowed hard and started to tremble, scared.

"Now, now, no need to be afraid," her father said and touched her cheek, causing Faith to jerk away. He grabbed her by the hair. "None of that, bitch," he said and slapped her.

Then he cupped her face and started kissing her.

Outside, Buffy sneaked up to Faith's house. She had secretly sneaked up to the house a couple of times before, trying to find out more about how Faith lived and trying to decide whether to pay her a visit or not as she finally wanted to tell Faith that she loved her. This visit was of a different nature, however, as she was bringing Faith back a book Faith had forgotten at her house.

When she got to Faith's window, she hesitated for a moment and then looked in. Her eyes went wide when she saw Faith kissing an older man. She stared at them, shocked. Then suddenly a cat passed by and startled her. She yelped and accidentally hit the window.

Faith's father let go of Faith when they heard the noise and they both looked toward the window. When Faith saw Buffy, her eyes went wide. They stared at one another for a few moments and then Buffy ran away. Faith suddenly felt very sick and she knew that whatever she and Buffy had going, it was over.

"The fuck?" Faith's father said, surprised. "Who was that?"

"I-I don't know."

He slapped her.

"Don't lie to me, bitch."

"I…"

He grabbed her hair.

"You're still a liar, aren't you?" he said as Faith screamed. "Looks like you need some disciplining."

"No, please, don't," Faith begged, knowing she was about to get beaten up.

"Shut up!"

As Buffy was running home, she felt like crying. She had been hoping that maybe she and Faith could get together and now she saw her kissing an older man. She was shocked and she didn't know what to make of it.

The next day at school, Buffy wanted to talk to Faith, but Faith didn't come. Buffy was confused and she didn't know what to think. Willow tried to talk to her, but she refused, reluctant to tell her what she had seen.

As she, Willow and Xander were going home from the Bronze in the evening, Xander suddenly noticed a familiar person.

"Hey, isn't that Faith?" he asked and pointed at the staggering person across the street.

Buffy and Willow looked.

"Yes," Willow said and looked at Buffy, who was quietly staring at Faith. "Buffy?"

Buffy sighed.

"Did Faith do something?" Xander asked, finally figuring out why Buffy was so upset all day.

Buffy bit her teeth as she remembered. She hesitated for a moment.

"I… I went to her house to return a book and I saw her… kissing someone, an older guy."

"Oh."

"Are you sure it wasn't the other way around?" Willow asked.

Buffy looked at her with a frown.

"What do you mean?"

"Perhaps the guy was kissing Faith."

"So? She didn't exactly put up a fight."

"Maybe she was too scared."

Buffy frowned and thought about it. Then an idea suddenly crossed her mind and her eyes went wide.

"Oh god," she whispered.

"Buffy?" Willow asked.

Buffy shook her head, not wanting to let her friends know that she thought the man was Faith's father.

"Let's take her to my place," she said and went to Faith.

Willow and Xander quickly followed her.

"Faith," Buffy said softly when she reached Faith.

Faith turned, her eyes wide, and staggered.

Buffy quickly caught her, but Faith shook her off.

"Let go of me," she slurred and tried to back off.

"Faith, talk to me," Buffy said.

"Nothing to talk about," Faith slurred and turned away.

"Faith…" Buffy started, but Faith started walking again.

"Leave me alone."

"Faith, please," Buffy pleaded.

Faith suddenly fell to her knees and threw up.

Buffy quickly kneeled beside her and held back Faith's hair.

When Faith was done, she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and got up. Buffy helped her, but once she was standing, Faith shook off her hand and continued to walk away. Her walking became more and more erratic and she finally collapsed.

Buffy barely prevented Faith's head from hitting the ground. She looked at Xander.

"Help me."

Xander quickly approached and together they lifted Faith up.

"Your house?" Xander asked.

"Yes."

When they got to Buffy's house, Willow opened the door and then closed it again when Buffy and Xander brought Faith inside.

"Mom!" Buffy called.

Mrs Summers quickly came from the living room.

"Yes… Oh my god, is that Faith?"

"Yes."

"What happened?"

"She's drunk."

"Take her upstairs to the bathroom."

Buffy and Xander took Faith upstairs and Mrs Summers and Willow followed them.

"Put her on the toilet," Mrs Summers instructed once they got to the bathroom.

Buffy and Xander did so.

"Thanks," Buffy then said to Xander.

"No problem."

"Eh, could you leave? You know, naked girls?"

Xander smiled.

"No problem," he said and went out.

"Do you need help?" Willow asked.

"No, I think we can manage," Mrs Summers said.

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow then, Buffy."

"Okay. Bye."

Willow left and closed the door.

"She's been beaten," Mrs Summers observed.

"What?" Buffy said, surprised, and took a closer look.

"Help me undress her, we need to clean her up."

Buffy helped her mother undress Faith and her eyes became wider and wider when she saw that there were bruises and cuts all over Faith's body, which meant that Faith had been severely beaten. She guessed that Faith's father had done the beating. When they took off Faith's pants, Buffy blushed when she saw that Faith didn't wear any underwear.

After they cleaned Faith and took care of the cuts and bruises, Buffy brought a pair of boxers and a large t-shirt, and then they took her to the spare room. After they tucked her in, Buffy stared at Faith for a few moments and then followed her mother out.

"What are we going to do, Mom?" she asked after she closed the door.

"I don't know, honey, we don't know who beat her up."

"I think I do," Buffy said.

"You do?" Mrs Summers asked, surprised.

"Yes," Buffy said and sighed. "I'll talk to her tomorrow."

"Okay."

"I'll take a shower now and then I'll go to bed."

"Okay, honey. Good night."

"Night, Mom."

When Faith woke up some time during the night, she had a major hangover. She felt sick, especially when she remembered what her father had done to her and that Buffy had seen them kissing. Then she opened her eyes and frowned when she saw that she wasn't in her own bed. She thought for a moment about whether she had screwed anyone, but she couldn't think of anyone.

She tried to sit up and she groaned when she felt pain in her head. She closed her eyes for a few moments and then tried to sit up again, this time more slowly. She made it and she looked around. It was dark, but she spotted the bed lamp and she turned it on. She didn't recognize the room, but it somehow felt familiar. Then she noticed her clothes on a chair. She looked down and saw that she was wearing a pair of boxers and a large t-shirt. She also noticed that her bruises and cuts have been taken care of and that someone had cleaned her up. Again that strange feeling appeared in her stomach.

She took a few deep breaths and then slowly got up. She stood still for a few moments to catch her balance and then dressed in her clothes, which, she noticed, were clean. She turned off the light and slowly walked toward the door. She slowly opened the door and looked out. She recognized the hall and she remembered hearing Buffy's voice the night before, just before passing out. She didn't know what to think, she just wanted to get the hell out of the house.

When she came home, Faith was relieved that her parents were either asleep or passed out. Her head started to hurt again and she felt dizzy. She barely made it to her room, where she soon passed out.

When Faith woke up in the morning, her head didn't hurt so much anymore. She sat up, thirsty, and her eyes went wide when she noticed the state of her clothes. Her hand went between her legs and she felt the sticky wetness there. She shuddered, feeling sick. She tried to control her stomach, but the alcohol she'd drank made that impossible. She went to her knees and vomited.

When she finally stopped, she climbed back on her bed and silently cried. When she calmed a bit, she reached behind the bed and took out a small knife. She rolled up her sleeves and started making cuts on her left upper arm. She cut slowly, trying to make the physical pain stronger than the mental.

She was doing this for a few minutes when she suddenly heard someone approaching. She quickly pulled down her sleeves and hid the knife behind her back. The door opened and her eyes went wide when she saw her father walk in.

"Well, well, I see you're already…" the man trailed off when he saw the pool of vomit on the floor. "You filthy bitch!" he said and slapped her a few times. "Can't you at least clean up after yourself? You're useless. A whore." He thought for a moment. "Well, maybe not completely useless," he said and leered as he unzipped his pants.

Faith tensed and just stared, terrified, as her father pulled out his dick and gave it a quickly wank.

"Make yourself useful, bitch," he said and spread her legs.

Faith silently stared as he leaned over her ready to insert his dick. Then she remembered the knife. She pulled it from behind her back and just held it close to her. And when her father leaned too close, he suddenly found himself with a knife in his stomach.

"What the…" he started, startled.

He looked down and tried to pull away, but his strength quickly left due to the high level of alcohol in his blood and he collapsed on top of Faith.

Faith was too shocked to even move and she just lay there.

When Buffy woke up in the morning, the first thing that came to her mind was Faith. She quickly got up and went to the guest room to check up on her. But when she got up, she saw that Faith was not there. She panicked for a moment, but then she realized that Faith had probably gotten up before her. She quickly went downstairs to ask her mother.

"Mom?"

"Hi, honey," Mrs Summers said.

"Where's Faith?" Buffy asked anxiously, having noticed the look on her mother's face.

"I don't know, honey," Mrs Summers said and sighed. "I went to check up on her when I woke up, but she was gone."

"Oh," Buffy said, disappointed. She thought for a moment. "I'll go to her."

"Breakfast will be ready in five minutes."

"Okay, Mom," Buffy said and ran back upstairs to dress.

"Oh man," Detective Sanchez said, shaking his head, when he saw the mess at the latest crime scene.

He'd been called to a murder scene all too early for his taste. And it wasn't just a murder scene. From what he'd been told by the uniforms, the mother had called. And apparently she hated her daughter. Though from what he'd seen as he walked into the room, it was clear to him that the father wanted to rape his daughter, but she stabbed him. And apparently he stabbed her as well, judging by the blood. He could only see one knife, the daughter's. How she died would have to wait until the father's corpse was removed by the medical examiner.

"Some times I just hate my job," he murmured to a uniform.

"Hey, Jose," his partner, Detective Murphy, said as she arrived. "Sorry I'm late, I got stuck at the DA's office. What have we got?"

Sanchez shook his head.

"Judging by what I saw, I'd say child abuse."

"Oh god," Murphy said when she saw the bodies.

"I'd say he was raping her and the mother knew that. And they were probably beating her as well. He apparently tried to rape her and she stabbed him. Apparently he killed her as well, though I don't know how yet."

"Eh, excuse me, Sir," one of the uniforms helping the medical examiner said.

"Yes?" Sanchez asked.

"I think she's still alive," the uniform said.

"What?"

"I think she's crying." She reached to check the girl's pulse. "She's alive, Sir, she has a pulse."

"Holly…"

The medical examiner checked as well.

"She's alive," he confirmed. "Help me get the body off. Quick."

"Get an ambulance," Murphy ordered when she saw that the girl was starting to tremble.

"Yes, Ma'am," a uniform said and hurried away.

"Looks like he did rape her," the medical examiner said when the father's body was removed.

"God," Murphy said and covered her mouth, trying not to vomit. "Where's the mother now?"

"I had them take her to the station for questioning."

"Oh." She looked at the girl, who then cuddled up, still clutching the knife. "Poor girl."

"Life can be such a bitch sometimes," Sanchez murmured, disgusted.

"Oh damn!" the medical examiner suddenly said and rolled the girl over.

"Oh no," Murphy said when she saw that the girl had stabbed herself.

"Tell that ambulance to hurry!" Sanchez called.

When Buffy approached Faith's house after breakfast, she saw that it was surrounded by the police. And when she noticed the ambulance, she got a really bad feeling. She started to run.

"What happened?" she asked when she got closer.

A uniform stopped her.

"Sorry, Miss, this is a crime scene."

"What happened?" She looked toward the ambulance and her eyes went wide when she saw that Faith was on the gurney. "Faith!" she called and ran past the uniform.

"Miss!" the man called, but Buffy ignored him.

"How is she?" she asked the paramedics.

"She has an abdominal wound," the man said.

"Can I come with her?"

"Are you family?"

"No, but she doesn't have anyone else."

The man hesitated for a moment.

"Very well then," he agreed.

While Faith was in surgery, Buffy called her mother to tell her where she was. After that, she returned to the waiting room and nervously paced around.

"Buffy."

Buffy stopped, startled, and turned.

"Mom," she said and ran to her. "Oh Mom," she said as she hugged her, crying.

Mrs Summers hugged her back.

"Shh, it's okay."

"How is she?" Dawn asked anxiously.

Buffy let go of her mother and looked at her sister.

"She's still in surgery."

"What happened?"

Buffy shrugged.

"I don't know. The police were there when I got there, but I didn't ask questions when I saw them take her to the ambulance."

"I see," Mrs Summers said and sighed. "Come, let's sit down."

She led her daughters to the empty chairs and sat down. The girls sat on either side of her and leaned on her. She put her arms around them and caressed them from time to time.

"Buffy," Dawn said when she saw Faith being wheeled out of the OR.

Buffy looked. When she saw Faith, she quickly got up and followed the nurses. Mrs Summers and Dawn followed her.

"How is she?" Buffy asked when the nurses and the doctor were leaving the room after having attached Faith to machines.

"Are you family?" the doctor asked.

"Ah, yes," Buffy said.

"Well, the knife missed any vital organs and she should recover quickly."

"Knife? What knife?"

The doctor gave her a sympathetic look.

"I don't know. All I know that she was stabbed."

"Oh. Can I see her?"

"You can, but be quiet, she needs to rest."

Buffy nodded and slowly went in.

"Thank you, Doctor," Mrs Summers said.

The doctor nodded and left. Dawn wanted to go in as well, but Mrs Summers held her back.

"Let Buffy first," she said quietly when Dawn gave her a questioning look.

Dawn looked at her sister and then nodded.

Buffy slowly approached the bed. She stared at Faith for a few moments and then took her hand. She hesitated for a moment and then caressed her, tears streaming down her cheeks.

After they were done with the crime scene, Detectives Sanchez and Murphy went to the hospital to check up on the victim and to see if they could find the girl who drove away with her to the hospital. As it turned out they were lucky.

"Eh, excuse me, Miss," Detective Sanchez said quietly from the doorstep.

Buffy turned, startled.

"Yes?"

"I'm Detective Sanchez and this is my partner, Detective Murphy. We'd like to ask you a few questions."

Buffy looked from one detective to the other and then slowly approached them.

"You're Buffy Summers," Detective Murphy recognized her, surprised. "My kids love her Saturday show," she quickly explained to Sanchez when he looked at her, surprised.

"Oh." He turned back to Buffy. "Em, I know this may not be the right time, but we really do need to ask you a few questions."

Buffy nodded.

"Okay."

"You know her? The girl?"

Buffy nodded again.

"She's my friend."

"Do you know her parents?"

Buffy shook her head.

"I've only been to her house a couple of times, and I've only seen her mother once. She was yelling something at Faith. I've never been inside." She frowned. "And I think that was her father."

"Who?" Murphy asked.

Buffy looked at her and sighed.

"Two days ago, she was tutoring me Chemistry and she forgot one of her books at my house. I took it to her house. I went to her window because I didn't want to meet her mother and I saw her kissing someone. I thought she was doing it on purpose, but now I think she was just too scared to move." She paused, shuddering. "And I think it was her father."

"I see."

"Em, you said she was your friend," Sanchez said. Buffy nodded. "But you only went to her a few times?"

"She was a loner and she didn't let people close."

"I see. And why did you go to her today?"

"Me and my friends found her drunk last night and she passed out before I could talk to her. We took her to my house and me and my mom cleaned her up. That's when we noticed that she had been beaten. When I woke up in the morning, she was gone. I went to her to check up on her."

"I see." He thought for a moment. "Has she been acting strangely?"

Buffy frowned, thinking.

"Yes. It started about a week ago. She was finally starting to open up to me, but a week ago, she just clammed up. And she had this haunted look in her eyes."

"Okay. Thank you."

"What happened to her? The doctor said something about a knife wound."

The detectives looked at one another.

"It's not a pretty story," Murphy said and glanced at Dawn.

"Dawn…" Mrs Summers started.

"No, I wanna hear it," Dawn said determinedly.

Mrs Summers hesitated for a moment and then nodded at Murphy.

"Well, we think that her parents have been beating her," Murphy then started. "And we think her father had been raping her," she said and Dawn's eyes went wide. "We think that he raped her some time last night after she got home. Then later, we think she vomited and cut her let upper arm."

"Cut?" Buffy asked, surprised. "Why?"

"We don't know, but we've seen it before. Sometimes people hurt themselves so they don't hurt someone else."

"Oh," Buffy said, tears welling up again.

"Anyway, judging by the freshness of the wounds, the medical examiner said that her father probably interrupted her and she hid the knife. And when he tried to rape her again, she just held the knife and let him stab himself."

"My god," Mrs Summers whispered, covering her mouth with her hand.

Dawn simply stared at the two detectives wide-eyed.

"When we got to the crime scene, she was so still we thought she was dead. She didn't move since she had killed her father. And when we removed his body, she cuddled up and stabbed herself."

Buffy's eyes went wide.

"I'm sorry," Detective Sanchez said quietly.

Buffy just nodded.

"What will happen to her?" Mrs Summers broke the silence that followed.

The detectives glanced at one another.

"Well, she might have to appear in court, we're not sure about that yet," Murphy said and then hesitated. "And she will probably go to a foster home now that her mother will probably be charged with child abuse."

"What?" Buffy said. "You can't be serious!"

"Can she move in with us?" Mrs Summers asked and Buffy looked at her, surprised.

The detectives looked at one another again.

"I think so. I'll talk to the social services and let you know."

"Thank you," Mrs Summers said.

The detectives nodded and left.

"Thanks, Mom," Buffy said and hugged her mother, who caressed her.

After a while, Mrs Summers and Dawn went home. Buffy didn't want to leave Faith alone, but she agreed to go home to eat when her mother promised to stay with Faith while she was gone.

In the afternoon, Willow and Xander arrived.

"Buffy?" Willow said quietly from the doorstep.

Buffy turned.

"Come in," she said and wiped her tears.

"How is she?" Xander asked.

Buffy sighed.

"She'll live."

"What happened?" Willow asked.

Buffy sighed.

"Her father was raping her and she killed him."

Her friends stared at her, shocked.

"And I thought my parents were bad," Xander said quietly.

"What's gonna happen to her?" Willow asked when she recovered.

"She might have to appear in court. Oh, she's moving in with us."

"She is?" Xander said, surprised.

Buffy nodded.

"It was Mom's idea."

"Really? Wow."

They were quiet for a while.

"Are you gonna stay here?" Willow asked. Buffy nodded. "I'll bring you my notes then."

Buffy smiled a bit.

"Thanks."

Faith didn't wake up till the next afternoon and Buffy didn't leave her side except to go home to eat and take a shower.

When Faith opened her eyes, her whole body hurt, her stomach the most, so it took her a few moments to notice where she was.

"Faith? Oh my god, Faith!"

Faith tensed as she fell someone hug her. Then she remembered what happened before she passed out and she shuddered.

"Are you okay? Should I call a doctor?" Buffy asked as she let go of her.

Only then did Faith see who had been hugging her. Buffy. She stared at her, surprised. She didn't want Buffy to see her like that.

"Faith? Talk to me," Buffy said, worried.

"Leave me alone," Faith finally said, already hating herself for having to do this.

"What?" Buffy said, surprised.

"Leave me alone," Faith repeated.

"Faith…"

"Get out! Leave me alone! I don't want you here!"

Buffy stared at her for a few moments and then ran outside, crying.

When she was gone, Faith closed her eyes and cried herself. She was a murderer now and she didn't want Buffy's name tainted. Her hand touched the wound on her stomach. She shuddered as she remembered her father's body lying on top of her, bleeding. She couldn't take that anymore, she just wanted the memories to stop, and the pain.

She looked around and saw a vase of flowers. She stared at it for a few moments and then reached for it. She threw the flowers out and then put it on the bed, covered it with the sheet and then crushed it. She uncovered the remains and picked the sharpest shard.

Willow and Xander were on their way to Faith's room to bring Buffy their notes when they saw Buffy come out, crying.

"Buffy? What's wrong?" Willow asked, worried.

Buffy hugged her and cried. Willow quietly held her, worried.

"She threw me out," Buffy finally said.

Willow frowned.

"Faith?"

Buffy nodded and let go of Willow.

"Yes."

"I think she's just upset," Xander said. "She's not used to people seeing her weak. And I think she knows you know what's been happening to her and she's ashamed."

"Yes," Willow agreed. "That's why she's pushing you away. She's scared of getting hurt again."

"But I don't want to hurt her," Buffy said and wiped her tears. "I love her," she added quietly.

"Then tell her that."

"But…"

"No buts. Go in and tell her that. Don't let her push you away, show her that you'll stand by her."

Buffy thought about it and sighed.

"Yeah, I guess."

Willow smiled encouragingly.

"Go in and talk to her, we'll wait outside."

Buffy nodded.

"Thanks," she said with a small smile.

Then she took a deep breath and went to the door. She opened it and her eyes went wide.

"Oh my god, Faith!" she shouted when she saw the blood, and ran to the bed.

Willow and Xander, having heard her, went after her.

"Go away," Faith struggled against Buffy, who had pulled the shard out of her hand and was holding her wrists now.

"Get a doctor!" Buffy called.

Willow and Xander immediately ran away.

"Faith, look at me," Buffy then said. "Faith!"

Faith flinched and looked at Buffy.

"Don't leave me, Faith, please," Buffy said, fresh tears running down her cheeks. "I don't want to lose you."

Faith stopped struggling and she just stared at Buffy, surprised.

"Please, Faith."

Faith's response was cut off by a nurse's arrival.

"What happened?" she asked as she saw the blood.

"She cut herself," Buffy said.

"Nurse?" the doctor said as he came in a few moments later.

"Wrist wounds."

"Get the bandages." He looked at Buffy. "Keep holding her."

Buffy nodded and looked back at Faith, who was avoiding her eyes.

Willow and Xander, who arrived with the nurse, waited by the doorstep, not wanting to embarrass Faith.

The nurse quickly returned with the bandages and helped the doctor take care of the wounds.

Buffy took the opportunity to wash her hands. She noticed that there was some blood on her skirt, but she didn't care about it, she was too worried about Faith.

"I won't have to tie you down, will I?" the doctor asked Faith after he was done.

Faith hesitated for a few moments, glancing at Buffy, and then shook her head.

"Okay."

"I'll get you some new sheets," the nurse said.

"Can you wait with that?" Buffy asked. "I need to talk to her first."

The nurse glanced at the doctor, who nodded, sensing that it was important.

"I'll come back in an hour, okay?"

Buffy nodded.

"Okay. Thanks."

The nurse nodded and then she and the doctor left.

"We'll wait," Willow mouthed and Buffy nodded at her.

When the door closed, Buffy looked at Faith, who was avoiding looking her. She sighed.

"Look, Faith, there's one thing I want you to know. I love you," she confessed and Faith looked at her, surprised. "I don't know how you feel about me, but I want to be at least your friend. I've been told what happened to you and I want to be there for you, help you deal with it."

Faith stared at her, shocked. She couldn't comprehend that after everything that Buffy knew about her, she still cared for her. No, not just cared, she loved her.

"How can you?" she finally asked, her voice coarse.

Buffy frowned.

"What?"

"How can you love me?"

"How can I not?"

Faith frowned.

"But you're a successful movie star. You're rich and you have a wonderful family. Me, I'm a nobody. Just another statistic. Hell, I'm a murderer," she said and looked away, tears starting to run down her cheeks again.

"Oh Faith," Buffy said and took her hand, trying not to cry. "Listen to me, Faith. It wasn't your fault, you have nothing to be ashamed of, you hear me?"

Faith looked at her and wiped her tears with her free hand.

"But…"

"No buts, Faith. I know he was your father, but he deserved what he got. Hell, he deserved more than he got. But at least the nightmare is almost over."

"Almost?" Faith asked, worried.

Buffy smiled.

"You're not going to be abused anymore, but you still have to deal with it. You have to talk about it, to someone, me, Mom, a shrink, but you have to talk, it's the only way you're going to take your father away the power that he has over you."

Faith stared at her, surprised.

"What, you a shrink now?"

Buffy smiled.

"No, just remembered something from the movie I stared in. And whoever wrote that was right."

Faith took a deep breath.

"I know."

Buffy smiled.

"As for how I can love you, it's simple. I've had a few boyfriends before, but the only one I really liked was Riley. And you know how that turned out. But the way you make me feel… I just can't describe it. I think I was in love with you since I first saw you, but I was too worried about my image back then to actually give it a thought." She took a deep breath. "And as I said, I don't know how you feel about me, but I want us to at least be friends." She hesitated for a moment. "We are friends, right?"

Faith stared at her for a few moments, surprised and moved by Buffy's speech, and then slowly nodded. She was rewarded by Buffy's smile.

"Good." Buffy took a deep breath to relax. "Oh, I have some good news. Since your mom will be charged with child abuse, Mom said you can move in with us."

"What?" Faith said, surprised. "But…"

"It was her idea."

Faith frowned.

"Really?"

Buffy nodded.

"Yes."

Faith sighed.

"I don't wanna be a burden."

Buffy smiled and gently squeezed her hand.

"You're not. Never," she assured her. "Oh, em, Willow and Xander are outside."

"Yeah?" Faith said, worried.

Buffy nodded.

"Yes. They've been bringing me notes."

"Oh."

"They were worried too, you know."

Faith sighed and nodded.

"How many people know?" she then asked.

"Just them and my family."

"Oh."

"Don't worry, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks."

Faith raised an eyebrow.

"Aren't you worried about your reputation?"

"Right now, my reputation is the last thing on my mind," she said and Faith looked away, moved. "Do you want me to tell Willow and Xander to go home?"

Faith looked at her again and took a deep breath.

"No, it's okay."

"Are you sure? I mean, if you don't want to talk to them…"

"It's okay," Faith said.

Buffy smiled a bit.

"Okay," she said and went to the door.

"Buffy?" Faith spoke.

Buffy turned.

"Yes?"

Faith hesitated for a moment.

"Thank you."

Buffy beamed.

"Any time, Faith," she said and continued to the door, elated. "Guys? Come in."

Willow and Xander entered.

"Hi," Willow said as they approached the bed.

"Hey," Faith said nervously.

"How do you feel?" Xander asked.

Faith sighed.

"Okay," she said, relieved when she noticed that there was no disgust in their eyes, only concern.

"Does anyone know what happened?" Buffy asked.

Willow shook her head.

"No," she said and put the notebooks on the bed.

"Good. Keep it that way. And if anyone asks, Faith was stabbed. They don't need to know about her parents or that she's moving in with me."

"Okay. When are you coming back to school?"

Buffy shrugged.

"I don't know. I'll stay here until Faith is released. Oh," she suddenly remembered, "I have to ask Mom if she's excused me…" She trailed off, jumping startled, as her phone rang. "Damn, I forgot I took it with me," she said and answered. "Yes?"

"Hi, Buffy, this is Janice."

"Hey, Janice," Buffy said with a smile.

"Guess what? You got the part of Emily."

"Really?" Buffy said excited. "God, I can't believe…" She trailed off, frowning. "When?"

"Next month."

"Damn, I can't."

"What do you mean, you can't?" Janice said, clearly surprised.

Buffy sighed.

"I can't. My friend's just been through hell and she needs me. I won't be taking any parts for a while. As a matter of fact, can you find a replacement for Saturday?"

"Saturday?"

"Yes. I'm staying at home."

"For how long?"

"I don't know, at least a month, I think. I'll let you know."

There was a slight pause.

"Sure must be special."

Buffy flashed a wide smile as she looked at Faith.

"Yes, she is."

Janice sighed.

"Very well then. What do you want me to tell the press?"

"That I'm taking a break and concentrating on school."

"Okay."

"And tell Francis I'm sorry."

"I will, honey. You take care of your friend then."

"I will. Bye." Buffy terminated the connection and put the phone on mute. "Sorry about this," she said as she put it away.

"Work?" Xander asked.

"Yes."

"What was the good news?" Faith asked.

Buffy waved her hand.

"Ah, nothing. I got some part I wanted."

"Why didn't you take it then?"

Buffy smiled.

"Because you're more important than some part. And besides, there'll be other parts."

"Oh," Faith said, moved that Buffy would give up something just to be with her.

"Who's Francis?" Willow asked, suspecting the answer.

"A director."

"Coppola?"

Buffy nodded.

"Yes."

"You're on a first name basis with Coppola?" Xander said in awe.

Buffy smiled sheepishly.

"Well, yes. He's nice.

"Wow," Willow said.

"Hey, I'm on first name basis with you, guys."

"But we're not famous," Xander said.

"So? There are a lot of famous people I'm not friends with, much less on a first name basis."

"Well…"

"Look, right now, I'm your friend, not a movie star, okay?"

Willow smiled.

"Okay."

Buffy smiled back.

"Good."

There was a knock on the door and then Dawn looked in.

"Faith!" she said, excited to see her awake.

"Hello," Mrs Summers said as she followed her youngest into the room.

"Hi, Mom," Buffy said with a smile while Faith started to feel uncomfortable. Buffy noticed that and looked at her. "Hey, it's okay," she said, gently squeezing her hand.

Faith looked at her and smiled a bit.

"How do…" She trailed off, her eyes wide, when she saw blood. "What happened?" she asked, worried.

"Nothing," Buffy lied, glancing at Willow and Xander.

Faith looked at her, surprised.

"I… I tried to kill myself again," she admitted quietly and looked at her hands, nervous.

"What? You're not gonna try again, are you?" Dawn said, worried.

Faith looked at her, surprised that Dawn was worried about her. She sighed and shook her head.

"No." She glanced at Buffy. "Buffy helped me."

Dawn looked at Buffy, surprised.

"You did?"

Buffy smiled.

"Yes."

"How do you feel?" Mrs Summers asked.

Faith took a deep breath.

"Better than ever," she said and smiled a bit.

Mrs Summers smiled back.

"Good." She glanced at Buffy. "Did Buffy tell you that you can move in with us?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah." She hesitated for a moment. "Thanks."

Mrs Summers nodded.

"No problem, honey."

Faith smiled at her use of an affectionate nickname. It was the first time someone had called her honey.

"Oh, Mom, did you excuse me from school?" Buffy asked.

Mrs Summers nodded.

"I did."

"Good."

"How long do you have to stay here?" Dawn asked Faith.

Faith shrugged.

"I don't know. I'll have to ask the doctor."

"We already got a room ready for you."

"Oh, Mom, Janice called," Buffy said. "I told her to find a replacement for my Saturday show."

"Really?"

"Yes. I also got the part of Emily, but I turned it down. So if anyone from the press calls, I'm taking a break and concentrating on school."

"You turned down Emily?" Mrs Summers said, surprised.

Buffy shrugged.

"There'll be other parts." She glanced at Faith. "Faith needs me."

Mrs Summers raised an eyebrow.

"Okay," she said. "Anyway, lunch is ready."

Buffy groaned.

"Go," Faith said, "I'll be fine."

Buffy smiled at her.

"Okay. I'll be back as soon as I can. Mom and Dawn will keep you company."

Faith nodded.

"Guys, are you coming?" Buffy asked Willow and Xander.

Willow and Xander looked at Faith.

"We can stay, if you want," Willow said.

Faith smiled a bit.

"No, it's okay."

"You sure?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah."

"Okay, we'll see you tomorrow then. Bye."

"Bye."

Willow and Xander then followed Buffy out.

"Who's Emily?" Faith asked when they were gone.

The Summers women looked at her.

"Only the part Buffy wanted more than any other," Dawn said.

"Oh," Faith said, realizing how much she must mean to Buffy if she had given up that part.

"I still can't believe she gave it up."

"Like she said, there will be other parts," Mrs Summers said with a smile.

A week later, Faith was finally released. The detectives had questioned her and the social services had agreed that Mrs Summers be assigned as her legal guardian. There was still a matter of appearing in court, but the detectives had assured her that there would be no problems and that she had nothing to fear.

After having settled in her new home, Faith first took a shower, not only to clean herself, but to try and get rid herself of the dirty feeling she had. It didn't work, so she soon gave up. After she dressed again, this time in Buffy's clothes, and after they at the pizzas Mrs Summers had ordered for them, she and Buffy went to her house to pick up her things. As they approached the house, Buffy noticed that Faith was getting more and more tense. She took her hand and gently squeezed it. Faith looked at her and she smiled at her.

"It'll be alright," Buffy said.

Faith took a deep breath.

"I know," she said and forced herself to smile back.

They finally reached the house and Faith opened the door. She hesitated for a few moments before entering and Buffy didn't pressure her, she just held her hand, reassuring her that she wasn't alone. Faith then took a deep breath and led the way to her room.

When they reached it, Faith shuddered violently and nearly vomited when she saw the scene, the vomit and the bloodstains still there. Buffy quickly hugged her and Faith hugged her back, sobbing. Buffy quietly held her, tears in her eyes, and gently caressed her.

It took Faith a few minutes to calm down and she then let go of Buffy. Since she avoided Buffy's eyes, Buffy cupped her chin and made her look at her.

"It's okay, Faith," she said and smiled softly.

Faith stared at her for a few moments and then nodded.

"I'll get my stuff now," she said in a coarse voice.

Buffy nodded and Faith quickly fetched a bag and started to stuff in the things that were most important to her. As it turned out, there weren't that many things and Buffy barely had the time to carefully look around the room before Faith was done.

"Is that all?" Buffy asked when she saw Faith was done.

"Yeah," Faith said nervously.

"Oh. Okay. Ready to go?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah."

Buffy waited for Faith to pass her. When Faith reached her, she reached out for Buffy's hand. Buffy was surprised, but she smiled.

Faith smiled back and then they left.

"You're fast," Mr Summers said, surprised, when Buffy and Faith returned home.

Faith shrugged.

"Don't own much," she said.

"I see," Mr Summers said, glancing at Faith's bag.

"We'll be upstairs, Dad," Buffy said and led Faith upstairs.

"Okay, honey," Mr Summers said after them.

"Do you need help unpacking?" Buffy asked when they got to Faith's room.

"Ah, no," Faith said.

"Okay. I'll be in my room then."

"Okay."

Buffy smiled and left.

When she was finally alone, Faith looked around her new home. This room was bigger and prettier than her own. She sat on the bed and bounced. The mattress was soft. She lay her head on the pillow and inhaled its scent. It smelled nicely and it was freshly washed. She stared at the ceiling and a few tears rolled down her cheeks. She wiped them and then stared at the wetness on her fingertips. She smiled, understanding that these weren't the tears of misery but the tears of happiness. For the first time in her life she wasn't afraid of being beaten. Or raped.

She shook her head, pushing the bad memories away. But then she remembered what Buffy had told her about talking about it to someone and she sighed. She didn't want to remember, but she understood that it was necessary to say it out loud, no matter how hard. She didn't want Buffy or her family to know what hell she had been through, but at the same time she didn't want to hide it from them. She decided to tell them, all of them, but only because she trusted them that they wouldn't make fun of her or pity her.

She frowned. She trusted them? All of them? She wasn't too sure about Mr Summers, not having met him very often, but she definitely trusted the Summers women, they had proven that they loved her.

She frowned. Love? It was a whole new world to her, especially the fact that Buffy loved her not only as a friend or a member of the family but as a… lover. She just stared at the ceiling, thinking about that little piece of information. Someone loved her, was in love with her. And the funny thing was that she thought she was in love with Buffy as well, judging by how the butterflies in her stomach went wild every time she was near Buffy or even when she was only thinking of her. Like now.

She took a deep breath to calm down. It was overwhelming and she decided to take a break and put away her things. She sat and grabbed her bag. She opened it and turned it upside down, letting everything fall out. She put away everything but her clothes. She examined them and decided that they could all use some washing. She stuffed them back into the bag and went to find Mrs Summers.

"Em, Mrs Summers," she said nervously when she found her in Dawn's room.

"Yes, Faith?" Mrs Summers asked.

"Am I disturbing?"

"No," Dawn said.

"Oh. Em, my clothes could use some washing."

Mrs Summers smiled.

"Come, I'll show where to put the dirty clothes."

After the clothes were taken care of, Faith went to Buffy's room and knocked on the door.

"Come!" Buffy called from the inside.

Faith entered and Buffy smiled.

"Hey."

"Hey," Buffy said.

Faith hesitated for a moment.

"Em, my clothes are all in washing. Could I, em, borrow some for tomorrow?"

Buffy's smile widened.

"Sure," she said and went to her closet.

Faith hesitated for a moment, thinking.

"Em, I've decided to talk about it," she said as Buffy took the clothes out.

"About?" Buffy asked.

"You know," Faith took a deep breath, "about what happened to me."

"Oh!" Buffy realized and her face became serious.

"To all of you."

"You mean my family?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah. I mean, I'm not ready yet. In a few days."

Buffy nodded.

"Whenever you're ready, Faith."

Faith nodded back and then looked around.

"Everything okay?" Buffy asked.

Faith shrugged.

"Just not sure what to do."

Buffy smiled.

"Whatever you did before. I mean, this is your home now too."

Faith smiled involuntary. Her home. A real home.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Buffy said.

Faith jerked, startled, and realized she had zoned out.

"Sorry," she said. "It's just… You said that this is my home."

Buffy nodded.

"It is."

"I know. A real home."

Buffy smiled.

"Yes."

Faith thought for a moment.

"You think I could just crash down in front of the TV and veg out?"

Buffy smiled.

"Absolutely."

Faith smiled as well.

"Cool. I'll, em, see you around then."

"Okay."

After a day of watching TV and doing nothing, Faith took a shower. Then she lay on her bed, thinking. She had been given a whole new life, a home, a family, people who loved her. And strangely enough, she found herself liking them, maybe even loving them. She'd never trusted anyone, yet now she had a whole group of people she felt she could more or less trust. The only thing that bothered her was the fact that she had been given so much and she didn't have anything to give in return.

Then she got an idea, Buffy loved her. Perhaps there was something she could give to her, namely herself.

In her room, Buffy lay on her bed, wondering if she should go check up on Faith or let her be. Her deliberations were interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Come!" she said and sat up. "Hey," she said with a smile when Faith entered.

Faith hesitated for a moment and then closed the door. She took a deep breath and then took a few steps closer to Buffy.

Buffy noticed Faith's serious face and she wondered what was wrong. She was about to ask when Faith suddenly dropped her robe. Buffy's eyes went wide as she took in Faith's naked body, which, now that it wasn't all bruised, looked very beautiful.

Faith noticed how Buffy looked up and down her body and she looked down, feeling dirty.

It took Buffy a few moments to gather her wits again. She looked at Faith's face and saw that Faith was ashamed. She frowned for a moment, but then she recalled that she was staring at her body. She blushed a bit as that fact sank in. But then she frowned again as she tried to figure out why Faith was in her room, naked. It was as though… Her frown deepened at the thought.

"Are… Are you offering yourself to me?" she asked.

Faith's face became red from shame.

"It's the only thing I have," she said quietly, refusing to meet Buffy's eyes.

Buffy stared at her for a few moments and then got up. As she slowly approached Faith, she saw that Faith was tense. She stopped in front of her, paused for a moment, and then leaned down and picked up the robe. She put it around Faith's shoulders and then cupped Faith's face, making Faith look at her.

"I'm not helping you because I'd want something in return, Faith," she then said softly. "I'm helping you because I love you and I love you too much to use you like that. I want to make love to you only when you're ready and only if you love me too. I value our friendship too much to risk losing it like this."

Faith gulped and tears started to well up in her eyes. Buffy caressed her.

"You don't have to be ashamed of crying, Faith," she said softly.

Faith fought her tears for a few moments and then gave up. Buffy immediately hugged her and quietly held her.

"I'm sorry," Faith murmured when she let go of Buffy, and wiped her tears.

"Nothing to be sorry about, Faith," Buffy said.

Faith stared at her for a few moments, feeling incredibly lucky to have found Buffy.

"Thank you," she finally said.

Buffy smiled.

"Any time, Faith."

Faith sniffed, hesitating.

"Em, I'll go back to my room now."

"Faith," Buffy stopped her. "If you don't want to be alone, you're welcome to sleep in my bed."

Faith hesitated for a few moments, thinking. On one hand, she didn't want to intrude upon Buffy, but on the other hand, she didn't want to sleep alone, she feared she'd have a nightmare again.

"Are you sure?" she then asked in a small voice.

Buffy smiled.

"Absolutely." She took Faith's hand. "Come."

"I, em, I should dress first," Faith pointed out.

Buffy looked at her and blushed.

"Em, yes, right." She smiled. "I'll wait," she said and let go of Faith's hand.

Faith hesitated for a moment and then left.

When she got to her room, Faith closed the door and leaned on it, closing her eyes. She felt such a fool. It amazed her how Buffy immediately saw what she was trying to do. She knew she had messed up, and Buffy's reaction surprised her. It was completely unimaginable to her that someone would love her so much and at the same time refuse to have sex with her. And she also had to admit, she wasn't ready to have sex yet, especially not with Buffy. She wanted their first time to be perfect. She also didn't understand that Buffy, and her family, helped her and expected nothing in return. In her world, there was nothing free, not even love. However, ever since Buffy had come into her life, she started to realize that the things that really mattered couldn't be bought, and Buffy's reaction a few minutes before proved it. She had offered Buffy the only thing that she had, the most valuable thing, herself, and Buffy had refused to take it. Not that she didn't want it, no, she wanted it, but only to be given freely, out of love, not out of some sense of obligation or as a payment or something.

Faith realized she had never felt this special in her whole life. A few tears rolled down her cheek and she wiped them. Then she looked at the wetness on her fingertips and smiled, knowing that they were the tears of happiness. She took a deep breath and removed the robe. She quickly put on a pair of boxers and a t-shirt and then went back to Buffy's room.

"Come!" Buffy called when Faith knocked on the door before entering.

Faith entered and closed the door behind her.

"Are you okay?" Buffy asked when she noticed that Faith's face was wet.

Faith smiled.

"I've never been more okay," she said.

Buffy smiled.

"Good." She backed off on the bed and removed the blanket. "Come."

Faith hesitated for a moment and then got in. Buffy covered them and then they stared at one another for a while.

"God, I love you so much," Faith finally whispered.

Buffy's eyes went wide when she heard that an Faith frowned, puzzled. Then, a few moments, later, she realized she'd said that out loud. She panicked.

"Faith…" Buffy started.

Faith quickly interrupted her by covering her mouth with her fingers. Then she realized what she was doing and she quickly removed her hand.

"Faith…" Buffy started again.

"No," Faith interrupted her, deciding to be honest with Buffy. She took a deep breath, nervous. "I know my timing sucks, considering I just offered myself to you a few minutes ago, but I mean it." She took another deep breath. "I think I've been in love with you ever since I first met you. And the longer I know you, the more I love you." She frowned as she thought about something. "And I'm not saying that out of gratitude either, it's not another way of me trying to pay you back for all you've done for me." She sighed. "I do love you," she whispered and a few tears rolled down her cheeks.

Buffy stared at Faith, surprised. Faith loved her? Really loved her? It was… Wow! She was a bit uncertain about it at first, but the look in Faith's eyes spoke volumes and she believed her now. She reached up with her hand and gently wiped Faith's tears.

"I love you too, Faith," she said and Faith smiled. Buffy smiled back. "I know this is hard for you, but I promise I'll stand by you. I can't promise you that I'll never hurt you, but I can promise you that it won't be on purpose and that I'll do my best to make sure that it never happens."

Faith smiled again.

"Me too," she said, her voice coarse.

"Come here," Buffy then said and raised her arm.

Faith hesitated for a moment and then cuddled up to Buffy.

"We'll take it slow, Faith," Buffy said and Faith nodded. "Good night."

"Good night, Buffy."

Buffy hesitated for a moment and then kissed Faith on the forehead. Faith smiled and then they drifted off into sleep, both dreaming happy dreams.

The End