DISCLAIMER AND AUTHOR'S NOTE: All Buffy The Vampire Slayer stuff belongs to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy and Warner Brothers. No copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. All other characters that appear belong to me. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies may be made for private use only and must include this copyright notice and disclaimer. Some of the dialog is from the Buffy episode Who Are You.

Something to Be Proud Of
By Kristjan Brezovnik

"Well, you guys will be safe now," the detective said as the medics lifted Buffy in Faith's body into the ambulance. "We may have a couple of questions in the morning."

"Oh, uh, of course," Joyce said.

"Thank you. Both. I'm glad we finally got the kid."

"She's not a kid!" Faith in Buffy's body snapped. "I just mean that she's very strong," she quickly added.

"Yeah. This Faith chick, definitely dangerous," the detective said and walked away.

Joyce went toward the front door.

"She truly is," Faith murmured and then followed Joyce in.

"Faith," Joyce said after she closed the door, and Faith turned around, surprised. "Why do you think she's like that?"

Faith shrugged, relieved.

"You know. She's a nut job. Heh."

"I just don't understand what could drive a person to that kind of behavior."

"Well, how do you know she got drove? I mean, maybe she likes being that way."

"I'll never believe that. I think she's horribly unhappy."

"Well, could be things are looking up. I mean, a little stint in the pokey, show her the error of her ways. I'm sure there's some big old Bertha just waiting to shower her ripe little self with affection."

"Buffy!" Joyce chided her.

"I'm sorry, Mom," Faith said and sighed. "It's just, eh, when I think about how she might have hurt you, I just, eh, I can't stand it.

Joyce smiled, touched, and hugged her.

Faith grimaced, not accustomed to such mushy affection. She was about to pull away when she heard a baby cry.

"Imagine that," Joyce said as she let go of Faith. "She slept through the whole commotion and now that it's all quiet, she wakes up."

Faith frowned, surprised.

"Yeah, weird," she said. Having no idea who Joyce was talking about.

"Why don't you go check up on her, I'll be right up."

Faith blinked, startled.

"Me?"

"Yes."

Faith gulped.

"Eh, okay," she said and went upstairs.

Upstairs, she listened for a moment and then went to the room from where the crying was coming. It was Buffy's room. She hesitated for a moment and then entered. She saw a crib and she slowly approached it. Inside was a baby girl and Faith stared at her, wondering when Buffy had had a baby. And with whom. With that boy toy she had seen her with at Giles'?

She hesitated for a moment and then picked her up. She felt a bit weird, holding a baby, and she wondered what was wrong with her. She dandled her a bit, trying to calm her down.

"She's probably hungry, right?" Joyce asked as she entered.

Faith sniffed the air.

"She doesn't smell."

Joyce smiled.

"Here," she said and gave Faith the bottle.

Faith took it, startled, and then looked at the baby. She hesitated for a moment and then moved the bottle to the baby's face. The baby immediately started to drink.

Joyce smiled again and caressed her.

"Too bad Faith didn't see her."

"She'd probably just hurt her."

"Her own baby?"

"What?" Faith said, surprised.

Joyce sighed.

"I wish I had told her, it might have made a difference."

"Why… Why didn't you?" Faith asked, still shocked.

Joyce sighed again.

"I forgot, with all the threatening going on."

"Oh."

Joyce thought for a moment.

"Maybe I should go tell her later."

"Probably not a good idea," Faith said, still shaken. "She might break out and kidnap her."

Joyce sighed.

"Perhaps. Still, you should go talk to her."

Faith frowned.

"Why?"

"She was your friend, right?"

"Eh, yeah?"

"Then you should help her find her way."

Faith stared at Joyce, surprised.

"Oh," she finally said.

Joyce smiled.

"I'll be downstairs," she said and left.

Faith stared after her for a few moments, surprised that Joyce still cared. Then she looked at her baby, who was still drinking the milk. She stared at her for a few moments and then looked around. She went to the bed and sat down. Then she stared at the baby again.

The baby was soon done and Faith put the bottle away. Then she watched as the baby yawned and mumbled to herself. She couldn't help but feel awe at the tiny being. And she felt proud that she, a murderer and a worthless whore, as her mother used to call her, could create something so wonderful and precious as the little girl in her arms.

She reached up and gently ran her fingers across Hope's cheek, marveling at how soft her skin was. The baby babbled something when Faith touched her and Faith smiled.

"Mommy's here," she whispered.

She found it strange to call herself Mommy, but it was by far the nicest nickname she'd ever had.

She suddenly felt very unworthy of being a mother. She wanted Hope to be proud of her, but at the moment, she had absolutely nothing to be proud of and a whole lot of things to be ashamed of. She sighed and caressed Hope, who had burped and fallen asleep in the meantime.

"Buffy!"

Faith jerked, startled.

"Huh?"

She looked at Joyce and then realized she was crying. She quickly wiped her tears with her right hand.

"Are you okay?" Joyce asked, worried.

"Yeah, five by five."

Joyce frowned.

"You sound just like Faith."

Faith tensed for a moment.

"I guess she rubbed off on me."

"Oh." Joyce nodded at Hope. "Is she asleep?"

Faith looked at Hope.

"Yeah."

"Then put her back in the crib."

"Okay."

Faith got up and put Hope back in the crib. She covered her and then pushed Mr Gordo, whom Buffy had apparently given to Hope, closer. She hesitated for a moment and then caressed her. Then she sighed and looked at Joyce.

"Come, let's go," Joyce said.

Faith took a deep breath and followed Joyce out of the room.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Joyce asked when Faith closed the room.

Faith frowned.

"What?"

"You were crying."

"Oh," Faith said, tensing a bit. She sighed. "No, I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah." She thought for a moment. "I'm going out now."

"Okay."

Faith walked around for a while, thinking. She had thought it would be easy. She would switch bodies with Buffy and then get the hell out of Dodge. But then things got complicated. She found out she had a daughter, and Joyce still cared about her even though she had held her hostage. It was confusing.

She wanted Hope to be proud of her, but so far Hope could only be ashamed of her. She wanted to do something that would make Hope proud, but the only thing that came to mind was to turn herself in. After giving back Buffy's body, of course. She knew that would mean giving up Hope, at least for a while, but she also knew that Buffy and Joyce would take care of her, so she wasn't worried.

She was reluctant to give up her freedom, but she had to, she wanted Hope to be proud of her. She took a deep breath and decided to see Buffy and tell her about it.

When she came to the police station, Faith was nervous. She took a deep breath and went to the counter.

"Hi. I'm looking for, eh, Faith Spencer?"

The clerk looked at her.

"Spencer. One moment." He consulted his computer and frowned. "Looks like she got away."

Faith tensed.

"She escaped?"

"Or was kidnapped. The officers weren't sure."

Faith quickly guessed it was the Council.

"Thanks," she said and left, worried about Buffy, and her plan.

When she got to Giles' house, she took a deep breath and then entered.

"Giles, we have a problem."

Giles looked at her, surprised.

"Buffy."

Faith sighed, suddenly nervous.

"No, I'm, eh, I'm… Faith."

Giles frowned

"You don't look like Faith."

Faith sighed.

"I switched bodies with her."

Giles' frown deepened.

"How?"

"Some magical gizmo the Mayor left me. But that's not the problem."

"It isn't?" Giles said, confused.

"No. The Council kidnapped Buffy, that's the problem. And they don't know it's her, they think it's me."

Giles stared at her for a few moments, confused.

"This is very…"

"Look, where's Red?" Faith interrupted him.

"Willow? Eh, I think she and, eh, Buffy were supposed to meet at the Bronze."

"Okay." Faith thought for a moment. "Do you know if the Council has any houses around here?"

Giles frowned, thinking.

"Yes, I think so. Why?"

"Because I don't think they can get her on the plane so quickly."

"Oh."

"Can you show me where they could've taken her?"

"Eh, yes, one moment." Giles fetched a map of Sunnydale and spread it on the table. He studied it for a few moments and then pointed. "Here."

Faith looked.

"Got it." She looked at Giles. "I'll drop by the Bronze and tell Red to come here."

"Eh, okay," Giles said, still confused.

Faith left.

"Red!" Faith called when she came to the Bronze and saw Willow. "Eh, Willow!" she called again when Willow didn't respond.

Willow turned and smiled when she saw her.

"Buffy! I didn't expect you yet. Eh, this is my friend Tara."

Faith looked at Tara, who smiled shyly and then frowned.

"H-Hi," Tara said.

"Hey," Faith said. She looked from Tara to Willow, back to Tara and finally back to Willow again. "Shit, Red, I didn't know you played for the home team now," she said and grinned.

Willow frowned.

"Buffy?"

"Eh…" Tara started.

Faith looked at her and guessed that Tara had apparently guessed she wasn't Buffy.

"Wanna tell her?" she asked her, and Tara blushed.

"Tara?" Willow asked, looking at her.

Tara looked at her.

"I-I d-don't think th-this is B-Buffy."

"Ten points for Blondie."

Willow looked at Faith and frowned.

"Faith?" she asked, uncertain.

"And ten points for Red."

Willow's eyes went wide.

"B-But how?"

"Some magic gizmo the Mayor left me." She took a deep breath. "Anyway, I need your help."

Willow crossed her arms.

"And just why should I help you?"

"You do want B to get her body back, right?"

"Eh, yes?" Willow said, confused.

"Good. Then go to Giles' place and see if you can reverse the spell. I'm gonna go save B now."

"From the police?"

"From the Council."

"What?" Willow said, her eyes wide.

"They got her and Giles showed me where she could be."

"He knows you're Faith?"

"Yeah. Now go and do your stuff, I'll be back with B."

Faith left and Willow stared after her, confused.

In the Council van, Buffy was still recovering from the drugs. She didn't throw a tantrum, she quietly gathered her strength and listened. Then she suddenly heard fighting and gunshots. For a moment she wondered if the police had somehow found her, but she realized that it was unlikely, not to mention that she didn't hear anyone order the Council guys to surrender. Which meant it was an enemy, since it was highly unlikely that her friends had already discovered Faith was in her body and not she.

The fighting quickly ended and silence followed. Buffy tensed, getting ready for a fight. Then someone started to unlock the back of the van and Buffy took a deep breath. When the door finally opened, Buffy blinked when she saw herself.

"Faith," she said, surprised.

Faith grinned.

"Hey, B. Missed me?"

"Go to hell."

Faith sighed.

"Guess not. Here," she said and threw her the keys to the cuffs.

Buffy caught them, confused.

"What's going on?" she asked as she quickly unlocked the cuffs.

Faith shrugged.

"I've had a change of heart."

Buffy frowned, surprised.

"And that's supposed to make it okay."

"No. But it's a start."

She backed off and Buffy got out of van.

"Nice work," she commented when she saw the unconscious men.

"Yeah. Come."

"Where?" Buffy asked, suspicious, and followed Faith at a safe distance.

"To Giles."

Buffy frowned.

"Giles?"

"Yeah. I told Red and her girl to go there and see if they can reverse the spell."

"What about that… thing you used at my house?"

Faith sighed.

"I destroyed it."

"Oh." Buffy then frowned. "Wait! What girl?" she asked, puzzled.

Faith grinned. She opened her mouth to respond, but then changed her mind.

"That's up to Red to tell you."

They walked quietly for a few moments.

"Why did you change your mind?" Buffy asked.

Faith sighed.

"Hope."

"Your daughter."

"Yeah."

"You've met her?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah. She woke up after they drove you away."

"Oh." Buffy thought for a moment. "So she made the difference."

Faith sighed.

"Yeah." She hesitated for a moment. "I want her to be proud of me," she admitted quietly.

"So you're doing this for her."

Faith thought for a moment.

"And for me." She hesitated for a moment. "It was a kind of wake up call. I realized I needed to stop running."

Buffy thought for a few moments.

"Okay, suppose Willow can reverse the spell. Then what?"

Faith shrugged.

"I'll turn myself in."

"Just like that?" Buffy said, surprised.

Faith glanced at her.

"Got a better idea?"

"Eh, no."

"Then just like that."

Buffy stared at her for a few moments, wondering if Faith was being honest with her.

"Who's Hope's father?" she finally asked, curious.

Faith glanced at her and shrugged.

"Hell if I know."

"Oh."

"Faith!" Willow said when Buffy and Faith came to Giles' house. Then she frowned and looked at Faith. "Eh…"

"I'm Buffy, she's Faith," Buffy said and Willow looked at her.

"Oh."

"Can you reverse the spell?" Faith asked.

"Eh, yes. Tara and I conjured another katra."

"Tara?" Buffy asked and looked at the blonde witch.

Willow smiled.

"Yes. She's a really powerful witch."

"Not r-really," Tara said shyly.

"Hi," Buffy said with a smile.

"Hi."

Faith rolled her eyes at their cluelessness.

Willow hesitated for a moment and then gave the katra to Buffy.

"Here."

"Thanks," Buffy said and looked at Faith.

"We better sit down," Faith said.

"Oh, right."

They went to the sofa and sat down. Buffy then raised her hand, holding the katra. Faith hesitated for a moment and then slowly reached up and touched it. Both Slayers jerked as if hit by an electric current.

"Buffy?" Willow asked, worried.

Buffy, finally back in her body, looked at her and smiled.

"I'm me again."

"Yeah," Faith said and looked down. She hesitated for a moment and then took a deep breath. "Come, B," she said and got up.

"Where are you going?" Willow asked.

Faith looked at her.

"I need to drop by B's house and then I'm going to the cops."

"Why?"

Faith rolled her eyes.

"What do you think? I'm a wanted murder, remember?"

"Oh." Willow frowned. "You're going to turn yourself in?"

"Smart girl." She looked at Buffy. "You coming?"

"Eh, yes, sure."

Faith looked around.

"I'll see you guys in ten," she said and headed for the door.

Buffy followed her.

"Why are we going to my house?" Buffy asked outside.

Faith glanced at her.

"I need to talk to your mom and thank her."

Buffy frowned.

"Why?"

Faith hesitated for a moment.

"For believing in me."

"Oh," Buffy said, not having a clue as to what Faith was talking about.

"Buffy… Faith!" Joyce said, surprised, when the two Slayers entered the house.

"Mom!" Buffy said and hugged her, relieved.

"Eh, honey?" Joyce said, confused, as she hugged her back.

Buffy let go of her and smiled.

"Nothing. Faith wanted to talk to you."

"Oh?" Joyce looked at Faith, who looked away, nervous. "Oh!" Joyce then remembered. "Faith, you have a daughter."

"I know," Faith said and looked at her.

Joyce frowned.

"You do?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah." She hesitated for a moment. "B and I switched bodies. The girl the cops took away on the stretcher was Buffy, not me. I was the one who fed Hope."

Joyce's eyes went wide.

"You?" she asked. She looked to Buffy, back to Faith and finally at Buffy again. "You're, em…"

"I'm Buffy," Buffy said. "Faith saved me and Willow managed to reverse the spell."

"Oh." Joyce frowned. "Saved you?"

"The Council kidnapped me. They thought I was Faith."

"Oh." Joyce shook her head. "This is so confusing."

Faith hesitated for a moment.

"I just want to thank you," she then said quietly.

Joyce looked at her.

"For what?" she asked, confused.

"For believing in me, even after I held you hostage."

Joyce smiled.

"You're welcome."

Faith hesitated for a moment.

"Em, I'm on my way to the cops now."

"You're going to turn yourself in?"

Faith nodded.

"Yeah." She hesitated again. "Will you… Eh… Will you take care of Hope?"

Joyce smiled.

"Of course."

Faith gulped.

"Thanks." She thought for a moment. "Will… Will you send me photos of her?"

"Yes, of course. In fact… Hold on, I'll get the polaroid and make one right now."

"And one of Faith!" Buffy called after Joyce, who went upstairs.

"Me?" Faith said, surprised.

Buffy looked at her.

"For Hope. So she'll know what her mommy looks like."

"Oh." Faith thought for a moment. "Thanks, B."

Buffy frowned.

"For what?"

"For trying to help me." Faith sighed. "Don't get me wrong, I'm still angry, but I know you tried to help me."

Buffy smiled a bit.

"You're welcome." She thought for a moment. "And don't worry, we'll tell her about you and we'll bring her to visit when she's old enough."

"You will?" Faith said, surprised.

"Yes. And hey, you can write to her. You know, just write down your thoughts and then, when she can read, you can send her the letter."

Faith thought about it.

"Yeah, I guess." She hesitated for a moment. "What are you gonna tell her about me?"

Buffy thought for a moment.

"The truth. I mean, not the whole truth with all the gory details, just enough that she'll understand that you messed up and were now paying for it."

"Oh." Faith sighed. "Thanks."

Buffy smiled.

"You're welcome."

Joyce quickly came downstairs, holding the polaroid camera in one hand and the developing photo in the other.

"Okay, Faith, smile now," she said and got the camera ready.

Faith took a deep breath and looked at the camera. She thought for a moment, trying to think of something worth smiling at, and then smiled when she remembered holding Hope.

Joyce quickly took the photo.

"Wonderful," she said, and Faith blushed. She looked at the photo of Faith. "Here," she said and gave to Faith when she saw that it was developed.

"Thanks," Faith said as she took it.

She looked at the photo and smiled when she saw the sleeping Hope.

"Do you want to go see her?" Joyce asked when she saw Faith run her thumb across the photo.

Faith looked at her and sighed.

"No," she said, shaking her head. "She's asleep, I don't want to disturb her."

"Oh."

Faith took a deep breath and looked at Buffy.

"Wanna escort me?" she asked. "I don't want the Council to get me."

"Sure," Buffy said.

Faith hesitated for a moment and then looked at Joyce.

"Will you tell her that I love her?" she asked quietly.

Joyce smiled.

"Of course."

"Thanks," Faith said, relieved.

She hesitated for a moment and then headed for the door, Buffy following her.

"What are you going to tell them?" Buffy asked when they were outside.

Faith glanced at her.

"The truth. I mean, I'll leave out the demons and stuff. And you, of course." She thought for a moment. "I'll tell them that the Mayor's old business partners wanted to torture me for information but that I escaped."

"Oh." Buffy thought for a moment. "I can tell them I rescued you," she offered. "You know, so you'll have a witness that you had been kidnapped and that you didn't try to escape."

Faith thought for a moment.

"You don't have to."

"I want to."

Faith sighed.

"Thanks."

When they got to the police station, Faith became nervous.

"You okay?" Buffy asked her.

Faith nodded.

"Yeah, just nervous." She nodded at the counter. "See that clerk cop?"

"Yes?"

"I talked to him when I came to see you. Just tell him you found me."

"Okay." They approached the counter. "Excuse me."

The clerk looked up.

"Oh, it's you again."

Buffy smiled.

"Yes. Anyway, I found her."

"Her?" He looked at Faith and frowned, apparently recognizing her. "You look familiar."

"I'm Faith Spencer," Faith said. She hesitated for a moment. "I'd like to turn myself in."

"Oh! That girl! Hold on." He got up and looked around the station. "Detective Stein!" he called.

The Slayers looked and saw the detective.

Stein saw them and frowned as he recognized them. He quickly came over.

"Faith," he said, obviously surprised.

"Hi," Faith said, nervous. "I wanna turn myself in."

"I thought you'd escaped."

"No, I was… I was kidnapped."

Stein raised an eyebrow.

"I saved her," Buffy said.

"Really," Stein said, not convinced.

"There's a warehouse on the outskirts of Sunnydale," Buffy said. "Though they're probably gone by now."

Stein stared at her for a few moments.

"I'm gonna need your statements. This way."

Two years later, Buffy and Joyce took Hope to see Faith for the first time. They hadn't told Faith about their plan, so Faith was surprised and she just stared at her daughter agape. Buffy stood Hope on the table and Hope pressed her palms to the glass separating her from her mother.

"Mommy?"

"Here, honey," Joyce said, picked up the receiver and pressed it to Hope's ear.

Faith quickly picked up her receiver.

"Mommy?" Hope said again.

Faith smiled.

"Hi, honey," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion, and touched the glass where Hope's palm was touching it.

"Why can't I touch you?" Hope asked, confused.

Faith sighed.

"Well, I've been a very bad girl and this is place is for very bad girls like me. The glass is there to keep me in."

"Oh," Hope said, not really comprehending.

Faith smiled.

"How are you, honey?"

Hope smiled and launched into a long account of her adventures. Faith just smiled and quietly listened.

"Okay, honey, let me talk to Mommy for a moment," Buffy said when their time was almost up.

"But I haven't told her everything yet," Hope protested.

Buffy smiled.

"You'll tell her next time."

"We're coming again?"

"Of course."

Hope beamed.

"Okay. Bye, Mommy," she said and gave the receiver to Buffy.

"Faith?"

"Yeah," Faith said and cleared her throat.

"How are you?"

Faith smiled a bit.

"Much better." She hesitated for a moment. "Thanks."

Buffy smiled.

"You're welcome. We'll come visit you again next week."

Faith hesitated again.

"Are you sure Hope can endure the ride?"

"Sure. And besides, I promised her."

"Oh." Faith took a deep breath. "Thank your mom for me, will you?"

Buffy smiled again.

"I will. Bye, Faith."

"Bye."

They hung up their receivers and Buffy looked at Hope.

"Okay, honey, time to go home."

"Bye, Mommy," Hope said and waved at Faith, who waved back.

Faith stared after them until they were gone. A couple of tears slid down her cheek and she quickly wiped them before she was taken back to her cell.

Next year, after helping out Angel and his crew, Faith was taken to Sunnydale by Willow.

"Faith!" Buffy said, surprised.

"Hey," Faith said.

"Hope! Look who came home!"

Hope came from the kitchen and her eyes went wide when she saw Faith.

"Mommy!" she squealed and ran to Faith.

Faith quickly dropped to her knees and hugged her tightly, happy that she was finally able to hold Hope in her arms again.

"Baby," she whispered, forcing herself not to cry.

"Are you staying home now, Mommy?" Hope asked a few moments later, and let go of Faith.

Faith let go of her and then cupped her face.

"For now."

Hope frowned.

"You're leaving?" she asked, her eyes wide.

Faith smiled and caressed her.

"Well, you know where I was, right?"

Hope nodded.

"Uh-huh."

"Well, I escaped from there to help a friend. I may have to go back."

Hope's face fell.

"Oh."

"Actually, you don't," Willow said.

Everyone looked at her.

"What do you mean?" Buffy asked.

"Well, while Faith was out, I did a little hacking, and, eh, well, she doesn't have to go back."

"Oh."

Faith stared at her for a few moments, surprised.

"Thanks."

Willow smiled.

"You're welcome."

Faith looked back at Hope.

"Looks like I'm staying for good, honey," she said and Hope beamed. "Looks like someone is sleepy," she added when Hope yawned.

"Uh-huh," Hope said, nodding.

"Come, let's get her ready for bed," Buffy said. "And I'll show you where you'll sleep."

"Mommy, can I sleep with you tonight?" Hope asked.

Faith looked at her.

"Sure," she said and got up.

Hope quickly took her hand and they followed Buffy upstairs.

"How are the Potentials handling Hope?" Faith asked when they got upstairs.

Buffy looked at her with a smile.

"They adore her. And it makes them more determined."

Faith frowned.

"What do you mean?"

"They want to be able to protect her, so they work hard at their training."

"Oh."

Buffy hesitated for a moment.

"Anyway, if you want, you can share the bed with Hope and me."

Faith looked at her, surprised.

"You sure?"

Buffy smiled.

"Yes, there's enough space." She glanced at Hope with a smile. "And I'm sure Hope would love it."

Faith thought for a few moments.

"Okay."

After they tucked Hope in, Faith grabbed a quick shower and joined her. Hope cuddled up to her.

"Night, Mommy."

"Night, baby," she said and caressed her.

Hope made herself comfortable and then drifted off to sleep.

Faith quietly observed her for a while. A tear slid down her cheek, but she ignored it. She pressed Hope closer to herself and kissed her on the forehead.

"I love you, baby," she whispered.

She took a deep breath to calm down and then closed her eyes and went to sleep, happy that she was finally at home with her daughter.

The End