Ways to Stop a Joel -vs- Mike Debate In Its Tracks:

1. "Who are Mike and Joel?"
2. "Screw 'em both, they just take away from that gorgeous Pearl's airtime."
4. Duct tape participants' mouths shut.
5. "Forget the humans, Crow should've been the host. It's anti-robotism, that's what it is!"
9. Offer 'Soultaker' as a peace offering.
15. "I think Mike and Joel were equally good hosts, but the fact remains that while Mike seems like the sort of guy I'd maybe like to have over for a beer, Joel seems like the sort of guy I'd maybe like to have lick whipped cream off of my naked body."

Send suggestions (and desired method number) to: program4food@yahoo.com