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Unlike Agnew...

Can they achieve Super Sucker status?

                                                                                       Brian Vinyard

     Interview:

     Unlike Agnew is:Joe Popham John Welch Jaycen Culp

     Site: Armadillo's. Annapolis Maryland, April 18

     "I am not a slut", screams Jaycen Culp, defending himself against his fellow band mates.

     "Every band has a slut," explains Joe Popham, the front man, "and Jaycen is our slut."

     You see, Jaycen is single and can take advantage of being in a rock band. His compatriots say that he won't commit. He says women just complicate his life.

     "Hey, there go some Naval Academy girls."

     There is a long pause in the interview as we all stop to stare.

     R&B: All right, what's it like to be in a rock and roll band?

     Joe Popham: It's a pain in the ass. You have to lug heavy equipment, you don't make any money, you get drunker than you want to 'cause you're stressed out, you smoke more cigarettes than anybody on earth should, you lose track of what you're doing half the time because you've got so much to worry about.

     R&B: Prozac, anybody?

     Joe Popham: I hit an owl last night. I've never been so unhappy and sad in my life and I've never killed ... anything before.

     R&B: Have you eaten chicken? (Rhetorical)

     R&B: What about the girls?

     Jaycen Culp: He [Joe] has a girl friend. He doesn't get any hoochie for the record.

     Joe Popham: The girls are there, the girls are always there, girls like people that are passionate.

     John Welch(in the voice of Animal from the Muppet Show): Play for Pearl Jam, Play for Pearl Jam, Play for Pearl.

     John Welch is a student here at Catonsville, a computer graphics major. He's 25 and deeply committed to his girl friend. John is the drummer of Unlike Agnew. He's my friend and one of the coolest people you ever want to meet. Above all John is a Super Sucker.

     What do the other members of Unlike Agnew think of him? "John's a wild man. You never know what he's gonna do next." John, known to his co-workers as Swany, seems to have a reputation at work as well. I talked to a girl known only as Raine, who said "John's kinda scary. You never know when he's gonna snap.

     R&B: How did he get his nickname Swany?

     Raine: No one knows.

     John is a recent addition to Unlike Agnew, a band based out of Annapolis a band that likes to "get it on."

     Commentary:

     There were three bands scheduled to play at Armadillo's that night. The first played as I conducted my in depth interview. "Smoke" is rock and roll hip hop, according to Jon C. Myers, a friend of the band. To be honest I didn't get to hear much of there stuff but to quote Crazy Horse "Me see'em, smoke'em on horizon."

     Next up was Good Charlotte, the best band on the Annapolis scene, according to Joe Popham of Unlike Agnew. I must admit Good Charlotte blew me away. The one thing that struck me about this band is, they are Tight! With a capital ight.

     This band is headed up by Identical Twin brothers Benj and Joel and I describe them like so: take a blender, add one part Sid Vicious, one part Elvis, run that through a FAX machine and out pops Good Charlotte. Someone in the crowd said they were straight up HFS.

     Patrick J. Thomas, brother of bass player Paul, described them as bubble gum punk, which seems to fit. Punk, but you can understand all the words.

     Speaking of words, their songs have great lyrics. The song titled "Deaf" featured this hook: "No sound is found when you're not around."

     I talked to a girl who claimed the twin rockers as her brothers; she was extremely proud and bragged about the band non-stop. When I said I heard that Good Charlotte was the best band in Annapolis, she said they're the best band anywhere. Later as I was rockin' out she tapped me on the shoulder and said "I told you so."

     They're good real good. Remember the name Good Charlotte-you heard it here first.

     I asked the sister if her brothers had any special abilities, like their own secret language, or if they could read each other's minds. She looked at me like I was retarded and said "They're not aliens." I get that look a lot.

     I asked Kenzie Dyer. a student at Anne Arundel Community College, what she thought of the band. She said "They're really great. If you talk to them, you can tell they're genuine." When asked about her philosophy on life she replied, "I believe you choose your own life." OK?

     Good Charlotte has a deal with Fell Records and their CD should be out in a couple of months. They also do acoustic shows a couple times a week at Acme in Annapolis. They play every Sunday night at Armadillo's.

     It was getting late as Unlike Agnew started to set up and rumors were swirling that there were several record executives in attendance. Unlike Agnew gave a free concert in the Barn a couple weeks ago as part of the Coffee House. You missed it, I know, 'cause I was there and I didn't see you.

     They have a good sound, good lyrics and are a very charismatic band. Following Good Charlotte can't be easy because they play at such a high level.

     The crowd responded well to Unlike Agnew. I heard a guy yell out, "Yeah! Hell, yeah, these guys are good" as the band got into their first song.

     The band has been together only for a couple of months and they're getting better all the time. There is a tremendous up side there, and sky's the limit for these local boys. Go see them while there unknown so you can tell all your friends you've been to an Unlike Agnew show when their songs are in heavy rotation on 99.1 WHFS and MTV's 120 minutes.

     In the middle of the set the boys called Forrest the bartender on stage to buy him a shot of tequila. When he was late to the stage, someone yelled out, "Can I be Forrest?" When he finally arrived on stage, he quickly downed two shots. Drink, Forest, drink.

     When I asked my good friend Mike Kean, 25-year-old senior out of Towson State, what he was thinking he a said, "Can I wait in the car? I'm getting a headache?" Rock on, Mike.

     I almost forgot - Armadillo's is a great place to watch a band and downtown Annapolis adds great atmosphere. The show was free and my tab only came to like $7.50. I had four or five beers, so obviously they screwed up, but hey, who am I to judge?

     To sum everything up, A., you should treat yourself to a trip to Annapolis to see Good Charlotte next Sunday. And B., you must check out Unlike Agnew if you value yourself as a person.

     And finally, to quote a classmate speaking to John

     Welch, "You should change your name to the Super Suckers."

                                                                                 Brian Vinyard

                                                                                  copyright 1999

     Brian has a nifty webpage at:

     http://www.cat.cc.md.us/~bviny547/index.html

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