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SOUTH
PARK:
BIGGER,
LONGER AND UNCUT
(RATING 7
OUT OF 10)
(1999, DIRECTED BY TREY PARKER)
This is a true success story. Whoever thought that a cable
cartoon show made out of construction paper cut-outs could come this far. Comedy Central
probably thought they had a decent time-waster in their hands when they starting running
South Park a couple of years back and now just like Mecha-Barbra Streisand in one of the
shows infamous episodes, the monster its rampant on the streets. Matt Stone and Trey
Parker hit it BIG with their concept of a cartoon with kitchen-sink production values and
four foul-mouthed dysfunctional kids growing up in a seemingly sleepy mountain town. After
the cult hit of the TV show, a movie was unavoidable. Face it, even if it were to suck, a
movie could have milked the last drop out of the South Park cash cow. But the movie,
doesn't suck and there's plenty of milk in those udders.
The TV show itself has been losing its enchanment of late with
too many reruns and lame-ass new episodes, so the movie had something to prove and a lot
to lose. Stone and Parker had to know they had to unload the goods in this 80-minute-or-so
perverted little movie. And that they do. South Park: B L U is hilarious, a movie
tettering at the edge of censorship and total vulgarity which manages to make you laugh in
spite of the fact it's not good for you.
The plot is actually thought-provoking: The kids come home
uttering obscenities after screening the auspicious film debut of those two flatulence
jokers from Canada, Terrence and Phillip. When the youngster's parents learn of the source
of the vulgarities they mount a campaign againt Terrence and Phillip, and eventually
against Canada itself. The story's absurd and works all the way. South Park B L U comes at
a time when debate has reignited over violence and sexuality in films, and kids sneaking
into R-rated films. Stone and Parker know, like the rest of us who actually think, that
it's all bullshit: Movies, as well as other media, can very easily be made scapegoats for
the lack of parenting in this country. In one scene, Cartman says: "This movie has
traumatized my fragile little mind."
And Cartman himself becomes the first subject for a V-chip that's brain-implanted and
shocks you for any utterance of a "bad" word. If the government and conservative
groups have their way, we all would have such a chip in our heads in the near future.
Not only are the United and Canada at War, but Saddam Hussein,
who's schtooping Satan in Hell, has plans to take over the world. Satan is portrayed as a
big sissy who complains how Saddam only wants to f*ck instead of talking for hours and
taking walks along the infernal beaches of Hades. The film's full of such nonsensical,
shocking lunacy. It's also a musical of sorts. But instead of the mediocre Disney
musical-fare, South Park's numbers are wacked out, being as silly and as crude as
possible, like for example the Terrence and Phillip show-stopper "Uncle F*cker."
And what's more screwy than the anthem "Blame Canada?" Perhaps Cartman's
amped-up rendition of "Kyle's Mom Is A Big Fat Bitch." The few weak points in
the film are a bizarre song about Brian Boitano (a figure-skating celebrity by the way)
and the fact the movie clocks in under 90 minutes (all such short films leave me kinda
cheated).
This film was a surprise, redeeming the lackluster status of the
South Park TV show and daring to ask interesting questions at the same time.
Unfortunately, the blockbuster chances of the film will be clipped by the current R-rated
kid-paranoia sweeping the nation which will keep outside most of the TV show's young
audience. If Stone and Parker's cult days are counted, at least we had a vulgar laugh-riot
in South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut.
Armando Valle
Jul/21/99
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